To find what’s happened to Michael Mosley quite anxiety provoking

[Glasto73lover]

It’s that idea of never really knowing what’s going to happen- the idea that we walk such a fine line in life. If you think too much about it, you probably wouldn’t leave the house.!

A close family member died suddenly and tragically a decade ago - literally dropped dead at home age 48 - something went pop in their head. So you genuinely don’t know when your time is up.

It’s that idea of a chain of consequence that can go so horribly wrong too- people always say ‘oh but you could get hit by a bus’ - stuff like this actually makes me really anxious. So many what ifs.

For Michael Moseley - a chain of probably inconsequential decisions may have led to his death- not having a phone on him, choosing to undertake a walk that in the U.K. is nothing but in that heat, was devastating and probably caused his death.

It makes me anxious that I won’t know if I am making those decisions - am I making sense? I think as I have got older, I have become more anxious and risk averse (thanks menopause) and as a result, you could end up not leaving the house. How do you choose a sensible approach? Not too much risk but some!

But I also want to live my life too!! I guess I find incidents like this quite difficult!

I guess always having a phone, not undertaking walks in intense heat in an unfamiliar place etc are the common sense points that will come out of this tragedy.

Aibu to find it anxiety provoking tho?!

A lot of people don’t enjoy walking etc. I actually do, but I also know people who grind out with their pedometers etc and don’t enjoy it but feel that somehow hitting a magic figure will transform their life. And another friend is getting constant headaches as she tries to fast through the morning at work. So some people do grind through things they find really miserable.

It takes time but in couple of years she will be lonely.

Or she won't be 🤷‍♀️ I hate this type of pessimistic outlook. She may be surrounded by good friends who don't fuck off, or shock horror, she may find a new partner.

I agree. I think it’s a bit of a lottery once you get into your 50’s and older. I know 3 women fairly closely who have been diagnosed with cancer in the last 2 years and a man who died after an accident at work. You never know when your time is up.

@MuseKira your DH clearly isn't like some men in my family then who often choose to make their own judgements and can be very stubborn in insistent doing things their way.

I only read news report that said he was feeling unwell so headed back - so no idea no accurate those are but took it to be feeling mildly unwell ie not up for rest of days activities but fine after a nap back at hotel situation - not so bad he needed someone with him - and that he possibly deteriorated on route.

Similarly - the repeated assertions that MM was returning to the friends home where they were staying

All his wife has said is that 'he went for a walk' - nothing more than that

I agree this is an age where fit people misjudge that their body has got older. You are more likely to get heatstroke as you age.

I understand he told people he was heading back to the villa.

No, his wife said he told her and their friends he was going for a walk.

Yes the “ letting him” go for a walk makes me wince as there is no way I could - or would try - to dissuade my DH if he decides to go for a walk. I think that’s all a bit unfair. He was a grown man.

I have found his disappearance and death very saddening. It could have been preventable . What has made a major impact on me was we saw him on “ tour” not that long ago and he talked about his fathers early death - 71 , I think it was . He didn’t even make it to that age . So sorry for his wife and children.

Loads and loads of fit people on MN think sixties is still very young and that your body has not really aged. They think all that matters is fitness. It is a very common belief. That does not make someone stupid. Their body is still fit and strong, they can still go for runs or go hoking so they think everything is as it was.

I understand he told people he was heading back to the villa.

No, his wife said he told her and their friends he was going for a walk

Fair enough, my mistake. I had read in the media and on here he was ' heading back" which I took to mean heading back to the villa.

It’s all very well accusing more cautious people of being holier-than-thou but why do you walk in such potentially dangerous places? If anything happened to you people would have to risk their own well being to find you.

Ageing and heatstroke is more about people in their 80s and 90s, not a fit 67 year old.

Compared to a 30 year old, MM was older.

But compared to an unfit, obese 45 year old he was possibly fitter.

The Times today says he was heading back to the villa.

Then I stand corrected and agree with many PP he should have been better prepared - had his phone, more water and told someone his actual route and roughly expected time back.

We do that in areas we know less well - even where we live we roughly say area and time.

Maybe that's why there such a range of response - felling mildly unwell returning unexpectedly without group taking less good route or taking wrong turn leading to understandably accident or planning an ardours hike/walk and being so ill prepared which is much less understandable.

But he was a doctor and someone very knowledgeable about health, illness, ageing etc. It's harder for older people to regulate body temperature, regardless of how fit they are. Ageing decreases the ability to sweat. He must have had some knowledge of it.

I understand you OP. I am only in my 40's but since having kids am a lot more risk averse - its just not worth the risk, but then you think 'he was only going for a walk on holiday'! However he was very irresponsible in the way he did it - 67 years old, no phone, small bottle of water in 37 degree heat (and the heat in that part of the world is fierce) and on his own. That's a recipe for possible disaster if ever I heard one. The thing is, if we borrow trouble from tomorrow all the time it ruins our todays - I guess we have to try and strike a balance but yes, the unpredictability of life is terrifying frankly.

My ex boyfriend's sister did exactly this and was hit by a car and killed. She was only 21.

But an ageing body depends hugely on all kinds of things.

I have friends in their 60s who are very fit indeed and far fitter than many 40 year olds who are overweight and obese.

I know someone in their mid-60s who runs marathons all over the world each year.

Fitness is a spectrum at all ages.

It's easy to measure fitness with tests for heart and lung health, and muscle strength.

I'm sure MM had done all of those at some point but that doesn't mean he (or most people) wouldn't succumb to heatstroke in those conditions when they didn't have enough water or ways to cool down.

I agree with you that it is a good idea and it is certainly something I encourage with my eldest who is 17 but he is always going off piste and will just text me DW (don’t worry), he must take after my Dad who I mentioned upthread and definitely is characteristically this way inclined. I am already getting worried about his first holiday with his cousin and friend the same age as I am worried about swimming in the sea etc. his cousin is very sporty and I feel he will get swept up with this over confidence. DH tells me that it is ok as he has friends have kids of similar age going abroad, probably drinking in very hot weather so it could be worse. I was similar though and never told my Mum where I was really going, this makes me worry more!

Times subscriber here and that isn't corroborated by any direct quotes, unlike the "he went for a walk" quote from his wife.

There are thousands of car related deaths every year, yet no-one stops driving

I wanted to say the same but was struggling to word it myself. I much rather have greek yog or dark choc than a donut or Twix.

You see it here all the time, that healthy living is dull and something to be endured. But people are ignorant and just assume it means tomato soup and beansprouts. But it’s nothing like that, we eat exceptionally well as a family and I still use many of Clare Bailey’s recipes from Fast800 books. I just make the portions bigger as we are not trying to lose weight anymore. The cook books also have a great selection of puddings and treats, I highly recommend them.

This!

I was very anxious waiting for a hospital procedure. I read somewhere..a coward dies a thousand deaths, a brave man dies but once. That thought at that time helped keep me calm. Not a panacea but works for me sometimes.