Am I about to make a huge financial mistake?

[MaryMaryVeryContrary]

DP and I have 2 children. Unmarried - he proposed but kids came along and can got kicked down the road. Didn’t see the urgency - I have my own career and money, but we keep meaning to as administratively it would tie up a few loose ends.

We have been together 8 years and after 1 year I rented out my flat and moved into his house. Tried to sell my flat during covid but no interest whatsoever so rented it out again. Now it is sold and the time has come to pool our cash and buy the family home we really want.

We found a property, got an offer on his house and all seemed to be going well. 1 week before exchange we discovered our plan - for me to contribute half the funds, and for him to take out a mortgage for the other half - isn’t viable as the bank won’t lend a mortgage to a person where another person jointly owns the property. Either we go on the mortgage together or nothing.

The issue is I have (paid off, from 2014) CCJ from an unpaid parking fine; and (believing I was sensible) have never had a credit card, so my credit rating is being refused for a mortgage.

I’ve been advised to give my (huge as an inheritance - 150k) deposit to DP, he then buys the house as a sole owner and I get a deed of trust to ‘protect my share’.

I feel everyone is trying to rush me into this and while I have an appointment with a solicitor next week, I would be really grateful for any input from others on what they would do. My gut tells me this isn’t a good idea.

If OP remarried it would invalidate her will.

No you don’t.

I wouldn't want to advise about the lump sum issue but I can help with tenants in common & bereavement
We became tenants in common when my late husband was terminally ill, the way it is set up means that they have 25% each inherited from him but this is in trust with me until I choose to give it to them. They could never force me to sell the house etc. I can sell the house & buy a new one if I want. It was good we did this as subsequently our youngest was diagnosed with SEN & they are unlikely to have financial responsibility as an adult - his share of the property will therefore stay in trust all his life

Can you get a credit card and pay for your basics and pay it off in full each month? This is what I had to do when I was getting a mortgage with now DH. He had crap credit but it was better than mine as I had just paid for everything cash. This is what the bank advised me to do.

Why didn’t he just leave it to you and then you could have left it to the kids? I don’t understand the advantage. It just makes you subject to the trust when managing your finances.

You can give £3000 away in gifts per annum tax free. Above that amount, inheritance tax is due.

@SackofSweets
There are multiple reasons - care home fees & inheritance tax to start with

Don’t do this. Listen to your gut instincts.

It’s not. Only if the person dies within 7 years. People need to stop giving incorrect advice. A cash gift is not subject to tax unless is accrued interest or is used for dividends. Op could give it all away and it’s subject to 0 tax unless she dies within 7 years.

I didn't think you could gift that amount without tax implications anyway?

Nooooooo!

@MaryMaryVeryContrary sorry if this has been said before. Too long to read it all. But even if you get married you should protect your £150k deposit. It’s not true that he can claim 50% if you make sure that the deeds reflect an unequal ownership in your favour. This is money you are bringing prior to the ?marriage. You can protect it all legally. Your solicitor can tell you how. Do it! You then will own 75% of the house which is correct if you pay half the mortgage or not if you get married because that money is in the future therefore all marital asset. You must protect your initial investment though. If you were to split it would be that you receive your £150k then half the profit from sale. That’s reasonable. Your partner has only reached equal equity to you once his mortgage is paid off. Until then. You deserve a higher split of the profit.

There are lenders who will lend to you whilst you credit repair, they aren’t your high street big banks but they are still legit mortgage lenders. You need to speak to a broker. Giving someone 150k isn’t the solution

A deed of trust is a legally binding document that would ensure should something happen, you would get your entire deposit back and then any remaining profit would be shared.
i don’t think this is controversial at all?
sounds totally reasonable as long as you’ve had it all signed off by a solicitor !

Have you tried other lenders, such as a credit union. We got out first mortgage with a credit union as they use different lending criteria and will meet with you to discuss any issues before making a decision. My husband had an issue with his credit report and this is why we used this option. It worked out well for us and we’ve since remortgaged with a bank 2 years on.

YANBU. A deed of trust can be argued in court if things got ugly. Trust your gut on this on. Source: ex family law paralegal who has seen it all!

Roles reversed I think most would agree it would be reasonable for him to contribute the money for the security of the family.

@MaryMaryVeryContrary

''My gut tells me this isn’t a good idea.''

~Please listen to your 'Gut'.~

Presumably you had a mortgage for your Flat?

I too haven't had a credit card for decades, but have a paid off mortgage- presumably my credit rating too would be non existent, despite paying off a mortgage?!

Please don't go 'giving' your £150,000 to anyone.

Get good legal advice.

EVERY time I over-rode a gut feeling {to do with men and money} my gut was proven right.

Good luck, OP.

Doesn't a ccj get removed from your credit record after 6 years. The bank wouldn't be able to see it or have I just misunderstood.

Don't do it OP! Listen to your gut feeling.

Incorrect.

https://www.crane-staples.co.uk/news/what-is-a-declaration-of-trust-and-why-is-it-so-important/

She can’t go on the mortgage jointly.

Nope, the estate of the person that gifted it had to pay IHT, the recipient of a gift is not liable.

You need legal advice, but (for example) if you can write your will so if one of you dies and you are tenants in common then you can leave your half to whoever you like, but establish a will trust (just means that the implementation of the will establishes the trust) so that the remaining person can continue to live there.

DON'T do it.. you're being put under pressure and told to just agree
A CCJ of 10 years shouldn't be an issue for a mortgage if it's paid off and I believe you can get it removed.
I'm wondering if DP Is just saying this to make you agree to his plan
See your solicitor but ensure he's not one DP uses/ has used
The most simple way to ensure you're treated fairly is to book an appointment to get married.. You could even do it during your lunch break!

Please do NOT be naive.

The house should be 50/50
So you get yourself on the deeds.

He's being underhanded and is using you.

He will be in control with a huge growing asset (off your back).

He hasn't got your best interests at heart, only his own.

It's absolute codswallop about the CCJ. It's been resolved and it was a decade ago!

Time to grow a pair and speak up for yourself. This is a very important moment in your life.