Embarrassing Doctor Stories

[OooSorryDoctor]

Lighthearted….. I went for a 4 mile walk the other week (5 weeks postpartum and not 100% my idea) and could barely walk the next day. Cue painkillers and a day in bed, until a mysterious rash appeared in the exact spot my knee was throbbing. Husband was concerned and said he’d never seen a rash like it, so better submit a picture to our local GP practice.

Long story short they called me in for an urgent appointment and within seconds I was diagnosed with a heat rash from using a hot water bottle 😆 cue a very embarrassed me apologizing for wasting her time 🙈🙈

Make me feel less embarrassed, what’s your best facepalm doctor story?

Many many years ago my Mum and Dad were on a motorcycle and were involved in an accident due to an elderly man stepping out in front of them. They were ok but had to be medically assessed. The doc asked my Mum if she was on the pillion at the time of the accident to which she replied she wasn’t taking contraception 😂😂😂

Crying actual tears at this! 🤣

Oh no I can definitely see how you would do it in those circumstances! Glad your DD was ok! I get so paranoid it'll happen to me one day when I'm in a rush or something.

I’m paranoid about my moles and developing skin cancer so went to the doctor’s about a new, slightly raised one that had appeared on the back of my shoulder. The doctor prodded it a bit and confirmed my worst fears - I’d just made a complete tit of myself by presenting her with a large blackhead to squeeze.

This one killed me too! 😅😅😅

Probably a horse rider, we develop very strong pelvic floor muscles . . .

Went for smear, nurse said, "have you hit something up there," me,"err...no!" turns out it was an ancient tampon.,she removed it and ti say it was malodorous is an understatement. I just used ti always forget I had tampons in and would sometimes find three strings and be rather surprised.

Took dd2 to the doctors when she was about 18 months and poorly. During the consult the doctor went to put his hand on her head just as I leaned down to kiss her on the top of her head ended up kissing his hand. He couldn't stop apologising. I couldn't stop laughing 😩

Drug names are generally made up words or based in ancient latin or greek, or a combination of all those things, and don't really have a proper pronunciation (or if they actually do, most folk wouldn't know it!). I wouldn't worry about it!

Tears spurting out my eyes at panpipe rash. It's absolutely fantastic. Also love the coco pops one. Would have been so tempted to sing the song if I was the Doctor 😂

It happens if you forget there's already one in, and put another in, so the first one gets pushed up along with its string.

I’m howling 🤣🤣🤣

When the midwife came to do our post discharge checks, she wanted to check my c section incision.

At the time I was wearing a dressing gown and some of those disposable sanitary pants.

What I did in my sleep deprived state was stand up and fully strip off, but it was a bit clunky because I was tired and achey and stiff. She looked at me a bit puzzled, and said "you could have just lifted up your gown but its healing nicely" and suddenly I realised that I'd just strip teased this poor midwife, and then I had to get dressed again, so I picked everything up and took myself to the bathroom and she tried to save it by saying "don't worry I've seen everything now".

I wanted to walk into the bathroom and never come out again.

Ouch that sounds painful. You poor thing, very impressive though! When people say bowl I automatically think of like a bowl you do the washing up in 😱I hope it was no where near that size!

Mine aren’t too bad, when I had gallstones removed and I was coming out of GA I kept saying “five more minties pwease” like a toddler when I didn’t want to wake up.

the doctor mentioned it when he came to check on me later although I think part of it is that minties for minutes is Aberdonian/Scottish and I was down in England at the time

During a doctors appointment to talk about stomach issues, my stomach made a huge squelchy gurgling noise that sounded just like a loud fart.
I was mortified and tried to explain to the dr that I hadn't farted and it was just my stomach but she didn't look like she believed me 🙈

DD managed to get a piece of wood in her eye when she was about 3 years old. She would not let me near it to try and get it out and I eventually called our local minor injuries (sadly now closed) and asked if I could take her in for them to try. We arrived I explained how distressed she had been when I tried. DD hopped up on the bed with a smile when the nurse asked, lay back calmly and kept her eyes wide open and let the nurse remove the tiny piece of wood with no problem at all.

A few years later XH called me in a panic one morning when DD had been staying at his. He had noticed a lump on her side and was taking her to the GP later for an urgent appointment. I was at work, asked him a few questions; no it wasn’t painful, yes she had gone to school happily until her appointment, lump was hard not soft. I suggested it might be DD’s lower rib, which has always stuck out a bit more on one side. Nope, he was sure it wasn’t that and it must be something serious. He called after her appointment to update me that the GP had indeed diagnosed it as her perfectly normal rib.

Omg this made me lol! 😂😂😂

During a smear
Nurse talking to ‘it’
‘Come on dont hide from me, turn around, thats it, tilt this way for me’

I was like, is there a baby in there that i dont know about

This reminds me of a thread quite a few years ago, where a heavily pregnant lady with young kids chatted out of the women’s changing women’s into the pool area for her horrified husband to point at her and shout out “your minge! “
She couldn’t see below her bump and had forgotten to put her bikini bottoms on

Its happened to me too. Iv broke several

I was newly married and all of a sudden had terrible burning when I peed & frequent urination & was just miserable all together.
I lived three hours from home so I called my kindly older doctor and explained all my symptoms.
He said, “You’ve got ‘honeymoon cystitis’ my dear - slow down and sit in a warm tub.”
I had to ask him what honeymoon cystitis was.
I was so embarrassed. I’d been going to him since I was a teen.

That's awful and it's so hard to get a new dentist too.

That's lovely 🥰

I once saw my gp for a serious of health issues. She had been great. Happened to bump into her in Tesco, went to say thank you for all your support. She looked at me, lifted her head up to look the opposite way and totally blanked me. Reminded me of my dd saying'I'm not talking to you!' When she was little.

I used to love that cream! It made your skin all luscious and yes, quite shimmery.

PMSL at the shimmery glowing baby at the doctors 😆