Page 10 | Embarrassing Doctor Stories

OooSorryDoctor · 2024-06-04T19:55:27+00:00

Lighthearted….. I went for a 4 mile walk the other week (5 weeks postpartum and not 100% my idea) and could barely walk the next day. Cue painkillers and a day in bed, until a mysterious rash appeared in the exact spot my knee was throbbing. Husband was concerned and said he’d never seen a rash like it, so better submit a picture to our local GP practice. Long story short they called me in for an urgent appointment and within seconds I was diagnosed with a heat rash from using a hot water bottle 😆 cue a very embarrassed me apologizing for wasting her time 🙈🙈 Make me feel less embarrassed, what’s your best facepalm doctor story?

Calliopespa · 05/06/2024 13:49

hookiewookie29 · 05/06/2024 13:44

Not me but read this elsewhere.....
Woman went to the doctors for a smear- first one, was very nervous. Went to the loo beforehand, there was no loo roll so she found an old tissue in her bag and used that.
Goes for the smear,halfway through the nurse stops and says " Well that's something I've never seen before !"
The woman starts panicking, fearing the worst.....and the nurse produces a first class stamp that had been stuck to her public hair! It must have been stuck to the tissue she used!

I think you read that on this thread actually 🧐

Cattyisbatty · 05/06/2024 13:52

blue345 · 05/06/2024 06:27

I wasn't sure if I'd pulled out my tampax overnight, GP surgery refused to help and sent me to A&E.

Eventually the poisoned chalice fell to a (very friendly) 6 foot four giant that wheeled the gynae trolley past us all with trays of unpleasant looking devices. He decided to use this episode as a teach in for a junior doctor so I had two faces plus a large light pointed up my fanny.

He described it as this: you start at the top of the cul de sac then you go down the cul de sac, checking as you go. Because it's a cul de sac, it can't go anywhere else. He must have said that word at least 10 times.

To top it off, the cul de sac was empty. I slunk off home making a mental note to never live in a cul de sac.

Edited

I was going to say similar. A few years ago I thought I hadn’t removed my last tampon for some reason (I have don’t this before when I’ve taken one out and there still the previous one up there 🤦‍♀️). Anyway I had a good feel around but read online the tampon could be hiding in the folds or something. So off I go to the local walk-in but of course there’s nothing up there at all. Thankfully there was no mention of cul-de-sacs and no junior doctors, and I’m now menopausal so that will never happen again.

Verite1 · 05/06/2024 13:52

MudandParsnips · 05/06/2024 07:19

About 10 years ago I started getting a red, dry rash all over my face. I started taking photos of it in different lights to show the doc for when I booked an appointment, but to save having horrible rash selfies, I saved into into a different folder on my camera phone. It was about this time that phones started to self make little montages with tacky music and weird colour filters. Lo and behold, when I opened the folder to show the doctor, my phone started playing a pre-reocrded video of my rashy face spinning into focus with some gentle pan-pipe music playing. I immediately tried to stop it it, but the lovely doctor didn't even laugh, he probably thought i had deliberately done it and just said 'aww, that looks really sore!'. Mortifying 🤦

And this one too!

LakieLady · 05/06/2024 14:06

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 12:17

Oh no!

A friend lost her sense of smell after a head injury {she was wearing a helmet} when her horse landed on her during a Cross Country course.

She says it's a sense she really misses.

After Covid, I met a woman who said she lost her sense of small...I had a bag of smelly dog treats to train my young dog with, and the woman couldn't smell those at all, despite getting her nose close to the bag and inhaling deeply.

Pic...Dogs randomly sniffing treets.

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Gorgeous whippets! I'm very jealous, I love whippets.

And if the blue coat on one of them is an Equafleece, my last lakeland terrier had an identical one, so that brought back some memories.

Spidey66 · 05/06/2024 14:08

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

How can you forget to wear underwear? 😮

starfishmummy · 05/06/2024 14:09

I toddled off down to his room when he called me, sat down and began describing in intricate detail the pain and how I couldn’t have sex in certain positions as it “was painful, I think because it’s deep…”
The receptionist came bursting in saying “Dr, you’ve left the intercom on”.

One of our GPs once left the intercom on, so the waiting room was treated to part of the consultation before the receptionist managed to stop him. However it was nowhere near as I threshing as this!!

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:11

CrotchetyQuaver · 05/06/2024 11:59

Had a very painful boil in the crease where your knickers sit, had to lie down on the bed so the nice young male doctor could have a look. All fine or so I thought. Got home, went for a wee and realised there was a 2p piece sized hole in my knickers where the gusset starts 😱 I nearly died of shame. Holey knickers now get thrown straight in the bin, not washed first as obviously I can't trust myself not to forget which ones have the hole in before I put them back in the drawer.

HOW does that happen?~~ I too notice occasional small holes in pure cotton knickers in the exact place you describe.
I laughed out loud reading your story.

FTMaz · 05/06/2024 14:12

CharlotteBog · 05/06/2024 13:34

I was about to reply that I often see the nurse that's done my smears because she lives and works in the village where we have a GP surgery*
Then I read your last sentence! Yeah....I never said that 😂

now closed.

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I mean just to clarify not one of the neighbours have actually seen my vagina…well except for her 😂

Calliopespa · 05/06/2024 14:13

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:11

HOW does that happen?~~ I too notice occasional small holes in pure cotton knickers in the exact place you describe.
I laughed out loud reading your story.

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Hate to say it but I think it’s from having the occasional itch!

CharlotteBog · 05/06/2024 14:18

Spidey66 · 05/06/2024 14:08

How can you forget to wear underwear? 😮

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Maybe it was a case of out of sight (bump hiding everything below) and out of mind!
I've forgotten to take knickers to the pool when I've gone in my swimsuit, and then done the school run commando (tracksuit on thankfully).

LakieLady · 05/06/2024 14:19

katseyes7 · 05/06/2024 13:40

Many years ago, my ex husband announced that he'd made a doctor's appointment because he'd found some 'weird red marks' on his body.
I had a look, told him they were stretch marks. Fairly new ones, by the look of them. I should know, l've had plenty of them over the years.
He was scathing and dismissive and said he'd 'listen to the doctor, thanks!'
Off he went. Came back.
Stretch marks because he'd put a lot of weight on..... 🙄

I hoped you laughed and said "I told you so".

My friend spared my ex an embarrassing trip to the doctor. She and I were discussing ovarian cancer, after another friend had been diagnosed with it. Friend was saying how awful it was that it was so often not diagnosed promptly and that women were brushed off and told their symptoms were IBS etc, when the Idiot Ex piped up "I might have that, the doctor says my gutache is IBS."

I couldn't say anything because it was taking every ounce of my self-control not to laugh, but my friend quickly explained that he couldn't possibly have ovarian cancer, due to not being in possession of any ovaries.

I was gutted, I was planning on encouraging him to go and speak to the GP about it. I'd have enjoyed ripping the piss out of him for the next few years.

Itsallfunngamesuntil · 05/06/2024 14:19

SteveMcqueensJeans · 04/06/2024 22:25

in my experience you can always tell how long a tampon has been in situ. anything more than 3 days and they tend to smell like the bottom of a wheelie bin in high summer. i hope the practice nurse was the consummate professional and never let on 😉

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I did this.....left tampon in and had no idea.....had gone to GP about an unpleasant discharge.

Let's just say she opened all the windows wide to let fresh air in

I was mortified!!!

Itsallfunngamesuntil · 05/06/2024 14:20

Itsallfunngamesuntil · 05/06/2024 14:19

I did this.....left tampon in and had no idea.....had gone to GP about an unpleasant discharge.

Let's just say she opened all the windows wide to let fresh air in

I was mortified!!!

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And v relieved I didn't get sepsis

idrinkandiknowthings · 05/06/2024 14:22

Before the menopause I went to change my tampon and couldn't find the string. I'd heard horror stories about tampons getting lodged in the vagina and causing fatal shock.

I went to the walk-in centre and the nurse there couldn't find anything. She sent me to A&E and I had to hand-write a note to the receptionist because the waiting area was full and I was so embarrassed.

I was examined again there and there was no tampon in sight. I was told that it must have just fallen out. Hugely embarrassing, not least because my period at the time was like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:24

LakieLady · 05/06/2024 14:06

Gorgeous whippets! I'm very jealous, I love whippets.

And if the blue coat on one of them is an Equafleece, my last lakeland terrier had an identical one, so that brought back some memories.

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Lakeland Terriers are lovely!
A really ''Old Fashioned'' type dog.

Equafleece are a great make- not cheap, but in my mind the best of the fleece dog clothings. {Don't wash with fabric conditioner is a top tip }

Yes...The Whippet in the Blue is mine- and she is wearing an Equafleece- the little Iggy {Italian Greyhound} is not mine, but has only three legs {missing a foreleg} after an irresponsible ''Dog walker'' subcontracted, and the man she subcontracted to took a huge pack out and let the little Iggy off- and he ran from the pack into traffic.

More Equafleece - {I have tried other makes- and the cheaper Ebay ones are only suitable as indoor house coats in winter}

hookiewookie29 · 05/06/2024 14:24

Calliopespa · 05/06/2024 13:49

I think you read that on this thread actually 🧐

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Nope....haven't read the full thread,but it may be the same story!

MrBallensWife · 05/06/2024 14:25

Beautifulbythebay · 04/06/2024 20:59

Went for a routine smear.. The nurse mentioned my - ahem- scar... Never even knew I had one there!!

This happened to me too,apparently my cervix tore during labour and is now a weird M shape?!,so I've been told every time I have a smear test!
Saying that though every nurse since has struggled to get a sample and 9/10 they refer me to the GP to do it.I should have a doughnut shaped cervix like normal people,whereas mine is in the shape of a bloody M 🤣.

Bagpuss1200 · 05/06/2024 14:26

An old colleague of mine who had a habit of talking non stop when nervous, asked the dr in the middle of a colonoscopy what made him want to be a bum doctor!

CaptainOliviaBenson · 05/06/2024 14:26

litlleseahorse · 05/06/2024 05:41

When my kids were toddlers and at nursery (I was in my 30s) we were all constantly getting ill- it was a relentless round of colds, flu, throat infections etc After my 4th or 5th cold in a row I started to develop what I thought was an ear infection, it was really painful. I couldn't face another round of anti biotics as they cause upset stomach and I saw on social media that if you put a clove of garlic in your ear it would cure an ear infection and was a natural remedy for infection. So I did. Unfortunately, I promptly fell asleep and it fell into my ear canal. It was agony.

I rang my GP and after some suppressed mirth, she told me to go to A&E. When I got there I told the receptionist in a quiet voice that I had garlic in my ear. She looked puzzled and repeated in a loud bemused voice "you have GARLIC in your ear????" causing everyone in the waiting room to look up in interest. I said yes and then had to wait for 2 hours whilst everyone stared at me as if I was mad. Finally, they called me through to be seen by a doctor- they told me I would be seen by a paediatrician as they had the necessary equipment for removing things from ears. I was then ushered through to the children's department, had to lay on a bed surrounded by Mickey Mouse pictures whilst the doctor suctioned it out of my ear. The doctor could barely contain his laughter. I have never been so embarrassed in my entire life and I do wonder what on earth they wrote on my medical records to this day.

OMG I'm crying! 😂😂

Dartwarbler · 05/06/2024 14:29

Curlygirl06 · 04/06/2024 22:47

After I had my twins via cs, I was bed bound for a day or so and when I had my first shower the midwife told me to keep an eye out for blood clots, as I'd not been upright for a while. I was having a shower and to be fair I didn't have my glasses on. I looked down and there was a massive big red lump in the shower tray. I called the midwife, she got her gloves and carefully picked the lump up, only to discover it was my strawberry soap that I'd dropped and hasn't realised.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
as someone who did leak blood clot in shower😐

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:30

hookiewookie29 · 05/06/2024 14:24

Nope....haven't read the full thread,but it may be the same story!

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The apocryphal urban myth?

Or ''FOAF~lore'' {Friend of a friend lore}

It's astonishing how Foaf~lore stories abound- in various iterations.

There was one that got me 20 odd years ago {before internet was universal for most people} about a little girl who had been abducted in a shopping centre.

Security had automatically closed all exterior entry/exits

They found the little girl dressed as a boy with her hair sheared off with the man in the public toilets, her own clothes in a bin.

Does anyone else remember this one?

Edit...seems they have! {2009}

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parenting/861958-kidnap-attempt-in-shop-is-it-true

katepilar · 05/06/2024 14:33

FTMaz · 05/06/2024 13:01

Had to work myself up to my first smear…stupid I know but never been great about anyone looking ‘down there’

anyway talked myself up saying you’ll never see this nurse in public blah blah blah. So I’m lying on the bed with my bits out ready to go and she says ‘oh sorry can I just confirm your address’ reads it out and it’s incorrect so I say oh no that’s wrong and give her the new one. She then says ‘oh have you got the white Mercedes? I live opposite you’ she then asks if I’d prefer someone else to do the smear so I say….in a state of panic and social anxiety ‘no don’t worry you won’t be the first of the neighbours to see me vagina’ WHAT THE FUCK 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ honestly I wanted the floor to swallow me up.

Its not stupid! Its natural we feel shy etc. I really hate when women are made to feel embarrased for something so natural. Plus often we have less than ideal treatment so no wonder we dont like getting naked in front of doctors and nurses and get procedures done on our private parts.

katepilar · 05/06/2024 14:42

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:11

HOW does that happen?~~ I too notice occasional small holes in pure cotton knickers in the exact place you describe.
I laughed out loud reading your story.

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I would love to know, too. Multiple of my knicker also have holes in the gusset, from the inside, and have no idea how that happens.

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:49

katepilar · 05/06/2024 14:42

I would love to know, too. Multiple of my knicker also have holes in the gusset, from the inside, and have no idea how that happens.

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It's really bizarre..I used to put it down to riding a lot {Horses and bikes}.

I had a knicker cull recently, buying a load of new cotton ones, from M&S chucking out the ones with the holes-
I think laundering has a lot to do with it- It's never new knickers that develop these holes.

LakieLady · 05/06/2024 14:51

oakleaffy · 05/06/2024 14:24

Lakeland Terriers are lovely!
A really ''Old Fashioned'' type dog.

Equafleece are a great make- not cheap, but in my mind the best of the fleece dog clothings. {Don't wash with fabric conditioner is a top tip }

Yes...The Whippet in the Blue is mine- and she is wearing an Equafleece- the little Iggy {Italian Greyhound} is not mine, but has only three legs {missing a foreleg} after an irresponsible ''Dog walker'' subcontracted, and the man she subcontracted to took a huge pack out and let the little Iggy off- and he ran from the pack into traffic.

More Equafleece - {I have tried other makes- and the cheaper Ebay ones are only suitable as indoor house coats in winter}

Show quote history

Lakeland terriers are cracking little dogs, but they can be ... challenging. One of mine could open doors really well (even if they had round door knobs) and the other was a very talented climber. Between the pair of them, there was a shortage of safe places to put things. They are born thieves.

Whippets are fabulous imo. I dogsit one from time to time, and she is so easy in the house, and mostly perfect when out, except for when she takes off after rabbits (or deer - no prey too large, in her mind). She's a beautiful blue and looks as though she's made out of pewter.