Page 11 | Embarrassing Doctor Stories

OooSorryDoctor · 2024-06-04T19:55:27+00:00

Lighthearted….. I went for a 4 mile walk the other week (5 weeks postpartum and not 100% my idea) and could barely walk the next day. Cue painkillers and a day in bed, until a mysterious rash appeared in the exact spot my knee was throbbing. Husband was concerned and said he’d never seen a rash like it, so better submit a picture to our local GP practice. Long story short they called me in for an urgent appointment and within seconds I was diagnosed with a heat rash from using a hot water bottle 😆 cue a very embarrassed me apologizing for wasting her time 🙈🙈 Make me feel less embarrassed, what’s your best facepalm doctor story?

WittyMcAdder · 05/06/2024 14:54

A friend of mine who went to the Dr very alarmed because her legs appeared to be turning blue through lack of oxygen.

Or (as it turns out), through the transference of blue dye from her new jeans

Umanresources · 05/06/2024 14:54

I had my babies at a teaching hospital. During an ante natal exam, I had several students in with me. A very young student was giving me an internal and inserted a speculum. The consultant asked why she had put it in the way she did. Consultant looked at me and asked, "Does your husband usually put his penis in sideways and then swivel?" I could truthfully answer no to that one. Students and I all had very red faces.

Another time I had my coccyx removed and the health visitor came to change my dressing. A few weeks later she came and asked me how I was. I was the teacher on duty in the playground and she was collecting her grandchildren!

katseyes7 · 05/06/2024 14:55

LakieLady Oh my god. You couldn't make it up, could you?!
I so wish he'd gone. You could have had so much fun with that! 😂

Lemonyyy · 05/06/2024 14:57

My doctor's kids briefly overlapped with my eldest at primary school. He was nothing but an absolute professional (still is, brilliant family doctor) but it was very confronting to serve him Pimms at the summer fete when a few weeks previously I'd been sat in his office with my top off having my mastitis diagnosed!

YourPinkDog · 05/06/2024 15:01

Deathraystare · 05/06/2024 08:02

Not half as bad as some of these! Anyway.......

I was at the GP. Forget what for - normally high BP/Diabetes or something. Anyway she was asking about what medication I was on (dunno why, just look at the screen!). I blurted out something in my head. She moved her chair back from me so fast it screeched across the floor ! "So you have schizophrenia? " "Er no" "That drug is used in Schizophrenia!". I then told her I worked in Psychiatry and would often photocopy stuff for junior doctors and it always seemed to mention this drug and for some reason it was in my head!!!

She took some convincing and I suggested she look on the screen for details of what drugs I do take..... High BP/Diabetes/ High Cholesterol/Heart failure.. nothing for mental health!

A disgusting reaction from the Dr.

FTMaz · 05/06/2024 15:06

katepilar · 05/06/2024 14:33

Its not stupid! Its natural we feel shy etc. I really hate when women are made to feel embarrased for something so natural. Plus often we have less than ideal treatment so no wonder we dont like getting naked in front of doctors and nurses and get procedures done on our private parts.

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Thanks for the kind words! When I was pregnant everyone kept telling me you don’t care about what goes on down there but I still did and still do!

LunaMay · 05/06/2024 15:11

A little bit different but... I hit 40 and it was literally like my body started falling apart.

I had an appointment booked with gp about an issue with my foot. A few days beforehand I'm eating lunch when my front tooth literally snaps In half. It's not able to be saved and I need to save to fix it. blah blah. I'm mortified and so embarrassed walking around with the gap. Anyway you guessed it, walk into gp appointment sit down and start going on about my foot while he's just staring at me then he pipes up with 'yes so what about your tooth is giving you trouble?'

I don't know who was more embarrassed when my mum piped that I was there about my foot...

Pppppplease · 05/06/2024 15:15

MarvellousMidgeMaisel · 05/06/2024 11:06

Had caesarian with DS, in recovery room afterwards cooing over our beautiful new baby, I remember getting really grumpy with the couple in the next bay because the baby had pood and it absolutely stank and was spoiling our magical moment. I called the nurse over all stroppy to ask them to change the nappy.... Nope- the baby hadn't shit herself... I HAD!!! obviously couldn't feel anything from waist down and had no idea it had happened.

god I almost choked on my coffee at this one 😂

KarenOH · 05/06/2024 15:18

Pppppplease · 05/06/2024 15:15

god I almost choked on my coffee at this one 😂

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omg SAME THING happened to me- I called the nurse to accuse the person next to me of shitting themselves (in a diplomatic way) and it was, indeed, ME.

GinandGingerBeer · 05/06/2024 15:20

pbdr · 05/06/2024 05:11

When I was 20 I attended an appointment with the practice nurse at my GP surgery for my first ever smear test. At the time I was a medical student, who ultimately planned to become a GP.
The nurse started the appointment by asking the usual sexual health questions, and one of them was "Do you have a regular partner?".

Now, in retrospect it could not be more obvious that she was asking about a sexual partner, but at the time I think just because we were in a GP surgery, and I was an aspiring GP, when she said the word "partner" I immediately thought GP partner. I thought she was asking if I saw the same GP whenever I would come to the practice. So I replied "No one in particular, just whoever is available." She was wonderfully non-judgemental and just noted a little something on my record.
It was about 5 minutes later that, mid procedure and legs akimbo, I realised. I explained what had happened to the nurse and she had to pause the procedure, she was laughing so much.

Not my finest moment.

Love this so much. Just the kind of thing I'd do

LongSinceGotUpAndGone · 05/06/2024 15:22

Getting dressed after I notice a sign in small font on a piece of white paper on a white wall saying “please use paper towels to cover yourself”.

I hope that doesn't happen to me, I'd never be able to cover my horrible great boulders with something the size of a paper towel.

mumda · 05/06/2024 15:24

Things I have learnt from this thread:

Before going to the doctor with something check your body symmetry. If you've got a lump in the same place on both sides it's probably normal.
Before you got to the doctors give it a wash. But not with a glittery flannel or a stamp encrusted tissue.
If you're excreting red ask "did I eat beetroot recently"?
Give it a good poke. Dried on coco-pops come off with a good poke.

Having sent moley-husband to the doctor over a particularly new flakey edged mole the doctor picked it off for him. Just a spot. I should have given it a good poke!

GinandGingerBeer · 05/06/2024 15:25

MudandParsnips · 05/06/2024 07:19

About 10 years ago I started getting a red, dry rash all over my face. I started taking photos of it in different lights to show the doc for when I booked an appointment, but to save having horrible rash selfies, I saved into into a different folder on my camera phone. It was about this time that phones started to self make little montages with tacky music and weird colour filters. Lo and behold, when I opened the folder to show the doctor, my phone started playing a pre-reocrded video of my rashy face spinning into focus with some gentle pan-pipe music playing. I immediately tried to stop it it, but the lovely doctor didn't even laugh, he probably thought i had deliberately done it and just said 'aww, that looks really sore!'. Mortifying 🤦

Omg I am howling here. Fantastic! The panpipe rash music

LongSinceGotUpAndGone · 05/06/2024 15:27

katepilar · 05/06/2024 14:42

I would love to know, too. Multiple of my knicker also have holes in the gusset, from the inside, and have no idea how that happens.

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It's caused by the natural acids your body produces gradually corroding the material. After I had a hysterectomy, it stopped happening to my pants (unexpected bonus).

Pppppplease · 05/06/2024 15:29

Had an epidural during my first labour not realising I would lose all ability downstairs so I was just farting constantly, then when the midwife examined me I literally farted in her hand, like a reverse cupcake. Mortifying.
After my 2nd C section I'd definitely shit myself, it stunk, they took baby and my partner through to recovery and they kept me back in theatre and were all rolling me on my sides and holding me there whilst the others sorted me out💩nothing was said, but I knew...

Pppppplease · 05/06/2024 15:36

FTMaz · 05/06/2024 13:01

Had to work myself up to my first smear…stupid I know but never been great about anyone looking ‘down there’

anyway talked myself up saying you’ll never see this nurse in public blah blah blah. So I’m lying on the bed with my bits out ready to go and she says ‘oh sorry can I just confirm your address’ reads it out and it’s incorrect so I say oh no that’s wrong and give her the new one. She then says ‘oh have you got the white Mercedes? I live opposite you’ she then asks if I’d prefer someone else to do the smear so I say….in a state of panic and social anxiety ‘no don’t worry you won’t be the first of the neighbours to see me vagina’ WHAT THE FUCK 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ honestly I wanted the floor to swallow me up.

😂crying

buffyslayer · 05/06/2024 15:39

One which was probably mortifying for my mum

A horse stood on my foot when I was about 6, and I kept moaning it hurt and was a funny colour
Mum being an ex nurse wasn't interested as no limbs hanging off and I wasn't gushing blood. Had to go to the doctor for something else and take my socks off, the doctor paused and said "did you know her foot is black with bruising?"

Yep. Broken

Age 17 she told me my ankle wasn't broken and my dad was "it's facing the wrong way?!"

Calliopespa · 05/06/2024 15:40

Itsallfunngamesuntil · 05/06/2024 14:19

I did this.....left tampon in and had no idea.....had gone to GP about an unpleasant discharge.

Let's just say she opened all the windows wide to let fresh air in

I was mortified!!!

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Opened all the windows!🤣

Voerendaal · 05/06/2024 15:43

butterpuffed · 05/06/2024 08:27

This is similar but I was embarrassed on behalf of the doctor who kept pronouncing my tablets as Clop~i~DOG~rel . They're pronounced Clo~PID~ogrel . I got the giggles and he asked if I was nervous
😄

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It can be pronounced either way - it is clop-it- dog- rel for me ( nurse with 40 years experience(

DontShow · 05/06/2024 15:54

LongSinceGotUpAndGone · 05/06/2024 15:27

It's caused by the natural acids your body produces gradually corroding the material. After I had a hysterectomy, it stopped happening to my pants (unexpected bonus).

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I only had this one on 6 month stay in Israel
Ants were getting in to my dirty washing pile and munching through the discharge I think 🤢

ShinyPebble32 · 05/06/2024 16:13

lemons44 · 04/06/2024 21:38

I'm having IVF and had a particularly difficult embryo transfer. I have a high up cervix that was kind of hiding to the side, and very strong muscles which kept pushing the speculum out. The doctor tried to get good access to my cervix for about 30-45 minutes before calling time for a break. An hour later, after the doctor had spoken to other doctors on the phone for advice about difficult transfers, we tried again. This time they sat me upright with the hope a different angle would work. In the room was the doctor, my husband, the embryologist and four nurses. I was high off my face on gas and air which they gave me to relax my muscles. After another few minutes in the new position the doctor announced 'I'VE GOT IT.. I'VE FOUND THE CERVIX' and THE ENTIRE ROOM STARTED CLAPPING. It's made even more embarrassing by me slurring out some 'woop woops!!'s and 'yeaaahhhhhs' in my high as a kite state because I was so relieved they finally found it.

I’ve got a very shy cervix too! I’ve always had to do lots of reassuring of red faced, mortified staff who have puggled around in there for ages before calling for backup!

Farcis · 05/06/2024 16:15

lemons44 · 04/06/2024 21:38

I'm having IVF and had a particularly difficult embryo transfer. I have a high up cervix that was kind of hiding to the side, and very strong muscles which kept pushing the speculum out. The doctor tried to get good access to my cervix for about 30-45 minutes before calling time for a break. An hour later, after the doctor had spoken to other doctors on the phone for advice about difficult transfers, we tried again. This time they sat me upright with the hope a different angle would work. In the room was the doctor, my husband, the embryologist and four nurses. I was high off my face on gas and air which they gave me to relax my muscles. After another few minutes in the new position the doctor announced 'I'VE GOT IT.. I'VE FOUND THE CERVIX' and THE ENTIRE ROOM STARTED CLAPPING. It's made even more embarrassing by me slurring out some 'woop woops!!'s and 'yeaaahhhhhs' in my high as a kite state because I was so relieved they finally found it.

This gave me a flashback to the embryologist popping her head through a hatch from the lab to watch my transfer....literally watch my transfer....as the doctor and two nurses were down there too!

DH sensibly sat by my head.

I was mortified - 13 years ago now and I still don't know why I didn't tell her to bugger off!

Alltheyearround · 05/06/2024 16:17

Mum said that right after she'd had me, the midwives rang for a doctor to stitch her tear. When he arrived he was the dishiest doctor she had ever seen in her life.

She said she wished she could have met him in different circumstances! 😂

Chocolatelight · 05/06/2024 16:19

I had an internal pregnancy scan with DS. The student sonographer attempted to inserted the wand blindly and went for the wrong hole - I eeked and she realised her mistake, red faces all round!

DungareesAndTrombones · 05/06/2024 16:19

Had 10 pound 1 ounce DS at home but had to go in for some stitches as his massive head tore me a bit. This tiny lady doctor was doing the stitching and just as sat down in front of me in stirrups she suddenly said when did you last do a wee? I said oh god dunno definitely during labour but not since.

Off she went to get a catheter and cardboard bowl to catch the wee. Which started coming and coming and coming and coming (I was so thirsty in labour) that she started to look panicked that the bowl would over flow. I was on gas and air so already sniggering but when she verrrrrrrrrrrrry slowly walked to the sink to empty it me and DH were howling!