Mum talking about other people's illnesses

[CheeseDreamsTonight]

God I sound so unkind even typing this out. I chat to my mum daily, nice chit chats about all sorts, daily check in etc. Lately however she has started telling me about other people's illnesses in detail every time I speak to her. I don't know any of these people. I don't think she even knows most of them.

AIBU to find this quite draining? I am sad for the families of these people but I don't know any of them. Nor does she. I don't know what I want from this thread really.

Do people do this as they get older? I suppose so many people they know are ill. I think she likes telling me about it but it's so hard to listen to.

Give us oldies a break. Just be glad you are young (ish) and healthy!

@Vitriolinsanity I already like a souvenir or novelty tea towel!!!

See! The end Cometh.

My mother does this. We have to hear all about the dicky tickers and dodgy knees of everyone in her village, and her sister’s village. And worst of all the village in France they grew up in (with a neat segue into the superior French health service.) I always assumed it was a French thing, except my Irish sister in law insists it’s an Irish thing too, and her mum’s even worse.

In contrast, MIL is currently being treated for tuberculosis and insists it’s all very boring to talk about and she’d rather discuss the interesting things in life. She’s one hell of a trooper!

Nobody needs to use Dr. Google . Just go to my mother's hairdresser on a Friday afternoon . Full of medical experts . And if that fails they can advice you which undertakers do a naice funeral .😀

@Soonenough oh yes the diagnosing is rife! 🤣

The older you get the more important illness is. We're all going to die of something and the closer you get to that, stands to reason the more thought you'll give to it. Other people's heart attacks, cancers, strokes and so on become far less something that happens to other people in older generations and far more what happens to people like you. Obviously not everyone dwells on this as they age, but it doesn't take a huge leap of imagination to understand why some do. Just try to change the subject to more positive things.

And competitive Wake spread.

Jean nailed it again,

@5128gap yes you're spot on here, I hadn't framed it like that.

My gran did this. Always telling us about a funeral she’d been to, or the infinite details of someone’s diagnosis of a terrible illness that meant it was curtains for them. She wasn’t a miserable person really, but that was what was going on in her life in old age: people dying. My mum would take the piss out of her endlessly for this (behind her back) at the time but now she’s in her 70s herself she bloody does it too. I tune out. My turn for this morbid fascination with other people’s deaths will come too one day.

My grandmother did this but much worse was finding out that she would tell not only her friends and neighbours but also complete strangers she got chatting to anything and everything of my private business which she knew. She was a horrible old cow though so hopefully other people’s mums/ grans don’t go this far.

My dad does this, I think it's an older person thing - I haven't heard of them half the time! I have asked him to start telling me about weddings and births, not divorces and deaths!

I’m only 43 and unfortunately have found myself talking about these kind of things a lot lately, a few of my friends have had people die and I’ve been to too many funerals myself in the last year. I also know a few people who have had heart issues, long term illnesses and cancer. So when I’m chatting to other people I automatically find myself talking about death and sickness and colonoscopies and all the things I never thought I would unfortunately. Am hoping it’ll pass and we’ll all catch a break

edited to add: also divorces- never knew people getting divorced before and in the last year I know of 4 so talk turns to that as well as you’re worried how people are