What’s up with the ‘out and about’ brigade?

[Nayouknow]

You know the ones. ‘I like to be out and about’ brigade. The ‘I’d be climbing the walls if I didn’t leave the house every day’ crew. The people who view time spent in their homes to be ‘wasted’ and time spent outside it to somehow automatically be more rewarding/interesting/energising/virtuous/insert positive.

I’ve only really come across this sort of mentality on MN and I find it fascinating. What’s their deal? Do they not like their homes? Do they have no indoor pursuits that they enjoy enough to be occupied for one day? Is it the actual outside air (not to be confused with the air in their gardens, as those of them who have gardens are generally very clear that hanging out in the garden isn’t sufficient)? Are they hardcore extroverts?

Like everyone else I know, I like to go out and I like to stay in. Walks are nice. Activities are nice. Spending a weekend at home cooking/reading/watching box sets/playing with DS is also nice. Based on their comments, the aforementioned crew would consider the latter a ‘wasted weekend’.

My house is small, my child is non verbal and has significant disabilities he can't play with toys because he doesn't know how but he does love going for a walk, his face lights up when we are in the woods or by the sea. My DH died so there are just the two of us here, if I didn't get out most days I wouldn't speak to another soul for days on end. I live rurally with very few neighbours so popping to the village for a walk or to the town for some shopping helps to ease the loneliness.

I have more of an issue with people who seem to think it's morally superior to get up really early!

I like to pretend (not in a showing off way) that I think it's great to get up early. It makes me feel better about the fact that I can't sleep past 6:30 a.m.!

It’s not that they’re out and about, it’s the comments about others not being that is the issue.... ‘Oh I couldn’t possibly stay in all day’ and ‘oh what a waste of a lovely day’ etc. Yes we know how you feel, you’ve told us multiple times. I’m still going to binge watch Bridgerton and snooze on my comfortable sofa with the dog’s. 😅

I wonder how many of the "out and about" folks go to where they want to go by driving there in their own car.
Monday to Friday I spend a LOT of the day on public transport.
By the weekend I might actually want to go somewhere but the thought of public transport again - I just need a break from it 😂
It's tedious, noisy, full of anti social behaviour. Urrgh.
Inside my flat is where my stuff is. Stuff I enjoy doing.
Outside is people !
I need a break from that.

It's the same type who place a value judgement on certain leisure activities - so it's fine for my son to read for an hour, but playing Spider-Man on the playstation for an hour is definitely not.

Those are the ones who couldn't possibly spend all day indoors, don't you feel you've wasted the day?!

It's like, just let people live.

Yeah it's exactly this. I couldn't give a toss if people want to spend 24 hours in the garden or outside- I hope people do what they enjoy. But its the snarky comments about wasting the day or looking aghast at your indoor plans thats irritating AF

I read this as
looking aghast at your indoor plants
....and was wondering what was wrong with indoor plants
(Tbf people probably would look aghast at any indoor plant I was in charge of because it would have died!🤣)

I honestly honestly couldn’t stay in my house all day, I’d feel so lazy BUT after a dog walk, swim and workout this morning, I was home by midday and have done very little other than clean the kitchen and chill. We’ve cancelled our plans for the evening, ordered in a Chinese and I cannot wait.
Balance I call it 😀

I like being in the house, but I only like it when I’m on my own, otherwise I feel claustrophobic because somebody always wants me for something. DC are very much outdoorsy children, and huge extroverts (much more than me!) They get bored being around the same people, they like to get out and interact. So by default, I go out, because otherwise they’re unbearable 🤣

I am a very restless person. I have to leave the house most days or I go crazy - covid Isolation was not a good time.

I am that person on holiday who has got up, showered, eaten breakfast, walked around the town, gone to tourist information and found three restaurants for later by the time everyone else is just contemplating getting up.

Yes. I am annoying.

I have long since known I am very annoying. I am very restless.

Different people like doing different thing things 🤷‍♀️ HTH

You’re not annoying as long as you’re not telling everyone else that they’re wrong for not living like you, which includes the comments like ‘what a waste of a lovely morning’.

There are two types of outside people.

The first is the everyone is different category. It's just their thing, you have your thing and you can talk about both and many other things and everything is fine.

The second is the one that acts like you're somehow defective or less or wrong because you're not an outside person. No, Margaret , I'm not depressed or ill or lazy . There's nothing wrong with me.it's just that home is my happy place. You can shove your concern up your arse(and run around the block with it) and if you keep tilting your head that way you might get stuck in that position.

I live in an apartment and like DD to be out of it because she’ll trash the place. Tbf pre DC we liked to slowly get ourselves out for brunch. We still get up and go out for lunch on weekends because yeah we can’t be arsed to make it ourselves. Tbh I just seem to spend my weekends doing child oriented activities. I do think though DD could do with an afternoon at home at some point.

Couldn't agree more, I cannot understand for the life of me why people would want to leave their house. It's bonkers to me.

Some people have no garden?

That's exactly how it is for me too.

I pay for my home - I quite like actually being in it sometimes where it's not in my bed 😂

I absolutely do feel like I have ‘wasted my weekend’ if I don’t get out. I would go for at least a walk as I walk every day. I get cabin fever from being home too much.

We kinda have a lovely home. I say kinda because with two toddlers it often looks like a tornado passed through it. We also have a lovely garden that I enjoy being in especially this time of year when all our hard work in the garden pays off and there is loads of colour and bees in the flowers and birds singing.
However, when we are out then I don’t feel like I have to be cleaning. At home I couldn’t just relax until the evening when the small ones are upstairs asleep.

If I don't get out the house at some point in the day , I end up feeling quite lethargic. It isn't necessarily about the company of other people, I am very introverted. I just need a bit of a walk/exposure to some fresh air and day light. I suppose I could do laps around the garden but it is only small and I imagine it'd get a bit repetitive quite quickly. Also, if I'm alone I don't mind chilling at home. Or sitting in the garden with a cup of tea. If I have a day with my toddler, it is a million times easier to spend the day out and about. It passes the time quicker, and he has fewer tantrums and sleeps better at night if we leave the house during the day.

Aren't they just Extraverts?...

I'm not an extrovert or outdoorsy but I find my toddler is much easier when there's some novelty (even if that's just a new supermarket or park). At home he plays nicely for 20 minutes maximum and then just trashes his toys so we spent time tidying up for him to trash them again. He's not yet able to play by himself for long and so we're both generally happier out of the house!

I liked to get out before having children but imagine we'll spend more time at home once he plays more independently and I can do something like read a book for 20 minutes - rather than just supervise and tidy up after him.

I also do a lot of wfh so I'm here plenty during the week. I also can't get out of an evening much as his bedtime is 6.30 but I am happy at home in the evenings!

@CloudDog only Mr Monkey if he is in "watching football in his pants" mode 😄

I do like my house (well flat) but basically it is somewhere to sleep and keep my stuff.

I think it's meant to rewire the brain positively to have a change of scenery.
I remember when my children were small being desperate to stay in and recharge; THEY are on the other hand were desperate from toddlers to go "out" the front door...that front door signified to them gateway to exercise and refreshment...rather like dogs now that I think of it (I didn't get one till my children were 17, but I recognise that same "instinct")

But trips and outings, no, very overrated as a daily diet. Exercise, walking every single day, seeing beyond your nose etc, but I've no desire to rush around making arrangements 24/7.

But I do think pastures new, on occasion, very important. It's a basic need. We are nomadic by instinct, wired to roam at least SOME of the time.

I have seen snotty comments on MN about people being happy to "sit at home" and what a waste of life it is. They are the sort of posters who would tell a severely depressed teenager to "get some exercise" or an obese person that it's their own fault they're miserable. Some people have a baked-in sense of their own superiority and very little empathy.