11 year old wants ear piercing

[Kira4]

My 11yo has really got a bee in her bonnet about wanting new ear piercings. She had had her ears pierced (lobes) when she was 8 (she’d been asking for ages) and now she wants a second lobe piercing and to get a piercing further up her ear (she said it’s called a helix).

Her dad initially told her a resounding no but that we’d discuss it because she keeps on about it. There was a suspicion that some of her friends (and maybe her) were planning to sneakily go and get pierced without telling anyone (don’t think/hope they'd have been successful) so I’m a bit relieved she’s openly asking and wanting to discuss it with us (she can be quite charming and persuasive when she wants to be!)

I’m inclined to compromise and use the second lobe piercing as a carrot/reward over the summer but do think the higher up ear piercing is something she’s way too young for. Would they even do that on a kid even with parental permission? Her dad and I will have to agree and suspect he won’t budge on either.

My (22 year old) daughter has a helix. It takes a lot longer to heal than a lobe and she may struggle with school depending on their uniform/PE policy as even if you get it done at the start of the holidays it won’t be healed in time.

I let my DD get a second lobe piercing at 11 (end of yr 6 treat), she had the first one at 8. I don't think there's much difference between having one or two lobe piercings.
I have said nothing else until she's older though, she would love a bellybutton piercing and more higher up her ear, I think 16 is more appropriate for them but I might let her have the ears done at 14.

I’d say yes to the second lobe ones and then helix at 13.

Helix piercings are notoriously difficult to heal and are prone to getting infected and knocked easily. Mine was a nightmare for a good year.

Dd had 1sts at 11, 2nds at 13

Then more from 16 onwards
She's 18 now & got 20 including nipples, belly button, nose and 16 various ear ones. Some are fine but she's had a few healing issues, all were done at a pro studio with a needle

I would say ok to 2nd lobes at start of summer, but then nothing else until 14/16 which the piercing studio will total back you up on

You’re v lucky then!! I have 12 cartilage piercings and helix’s were the worst ones to heal every single time. Conch was best because I could sleep on that ear after 6 months 😅

I really want my conch done.

I have 10 piercings, nine of which are in my ears, including three helixes.

Second lobe for a 11-year-old, fine. But any cartilage piercings (which is what a helix piercing is) really need to wait until she’s at least 13 or 14, preferably older.

A cartilage piercing of any kind is a bigger deal than a lobe piercing. They take much longer to heal (it can be many, many months), require more diligent aftercare, and MUST be done with a needle by a proper piercer. Even lobes are much better done with a needle, but it’s doubly important for a cartilage piercing - with a gun, there’s far more risk of the cartilage shattering or infection setting in, which could see your child end up with an unfixable cauliflower ear.

If your daughter’s school doesn’t allow multiple ear piercings, and she has to keep taking a helix piercing out, it will never heal properly and will just keep getting infected - even if she had it done at the start of the holidays, it wouldn’t be anywhere near healed by the time term starts again.

Me too Wheel that photo you posted with all the sites - I'm looking at my ear with one lobe and a small daith hoop (other one has 4 ) and thinking "Ooooh there's room for a new piece ....."

@70isaLimitNotaTarget i want my daith done too! Is that as bad to heal? I’ve also got my tragus done and that’s not been easy either.

I would say no. Most schools won't allow it anyway.

If your daughter’s school doesn’t allow multiple ear piercings, and she has to keep taking a helix piercing out, it will never heal properly and will just keep getting infected - even if she had it done at the start of the holidays, it wouldn’t be anywhere near healed by the time term starts again

This x100
You don't even touch a cartilige piercing beyond gentle cleaning and drying . No twisting or fiddling and certainly no removing . .Some sites suggest 6-12 months to heal a helix so there's a lot of differing advice and a lot deoends on the individual self care .

Thanks

The daith was my first cartilidge , it heals nicely because its tucked away and it really wasn;t painful .
I don't wear ear-pods , you'd have to consider how they fit .

I just had it changed after 2.6 years (so I was happy it had healed )

New tragus is ok but tender , the forward helix is still a little git!

It doesn’t sound like the helix would be practical for anyone who is serious about sport regardless of age as you can’t take it regularly for a very long time? Not a runner for her ever if that’s the case I think

My daughter had no problem as a dancer. She does have to cover it (but not her industrial) at work though for food hygiene reasons.

I'd say yes to the second lobe but probably no to the helix at this age. I have a lot of piercings and was young when I had them done but I didn't get anything other than earlobes until I was 14.

I have a fair few ear piercing, my girls had their lobes done at 8/9.

I've told them both I'm not particularly bothered about what else they want - I feel like I can hardly say no with all my holes! They know they will hurt and have to heal so it's their choice imo. I have said I don't like face piercings though, bar a tiny nose stud.

2 girls in my daughter's year 6 class had their belly button pierced at Easter which I was shocked about tbh, I think body piercing is completely different to ears and would definitely not allow that at 11.

My helix has been absolutely fine - it can be uncomfortable to sleep on but I can live with that!

I definitely wouldn’t let my daughter get a helix piercing at 11. Like others on this thread, I had to be very careful not to knock it when hair washing/brushing hair for a while and couldn’t sleep on it for a month or two. My cousin had one this year and almost had to go to A&E as it became infected after 6 months. Luckily, out of hours managed to get it out and it calmed down after a while but they did seem worried for a bit.

I’m not sure how to explain it really but it just doesn’t look right to me for a young girl to have it. A bit like seeing her in high heels, make up etc, a helix piercing just seems too grown up to me for someone in primary school/lower secondary.

Mine (when I was 31 ish) healed pretty easily too, which surprised me after hearing all the stories about how troublesome they can be! Maybe I was just lucky though, as I don’t recall doing anything specific to get it to heal other than just leaving it alone?

@Kira4 I doubt very much that any piercer will do it for her! I, a granny, took my very tall 15 year old grandaughter to get a second piercing and I had to provide passport at 69 years old for id!! that was just in January!! I told my grandaughter that the helix is actually really sore being done!!

I'd offer a compromise and take her for her nose pierced instead of the helix.

Seriously , if the school at at all strict about piercings then you might be ok with the 2nd lobes but there's every chance she'll have to remove them at least for PE . DD Secondary was far less strict than Primary . She didn't get her first lobes done till she finished Yr 6 .

Primary School wouldn't allow any piercings at any time . Not even taped .

If you say "OK you can have your helix done" then it could be academic if the schools say "No" and the piercers won;t do it ,

Years ago I was out somewhere I'd never been before , three girls (about 12yo) came up and said "Can you go with us to get her bellybutton pierced , her Mum says its ok"

I'd never seen these girls , so the Hell was I being their Consenting Adult (before you needed photo ID).
I said "If your Mum says its ok get your Mum to take you"

I'm going to go against the grain here and say let her do it.

I have piercings and I love them, plus ear piercing is relatively low risk. She's old enough to understand the importance of cleaning etc.

There are many lovely ear cuffs /fake helix rings to buy until she's old enough to take care of a helix piercing.