Is this friend just not a friend?

[Friendornot]

Things she has said:

If I had a pantry in my house like you it would be much tidier than yours. (When visiting)

hmm I wouldn’t have decorated like that

shall we tidy up? (I had just tidied up and cleaned before she got here)

says shes popping in for a coffee and turns up with a load of kids she’s babysitting (I don’t know them) one breaks my kids stuff and the others laugh about special needs kids- she doesn’t say anything to kid

also gets really odd and off with me when I spend time with any other friends

I’ve known her less than a year.

also frequently explains things to me in a patronising way

we have things in common I just feel a bit baffled by her comments

She sounds like a nasty piece of work.

Never have her in your home again. If you have things in common or kids get on etc then meet in park or somewhere in short doses where you can get away easily. If that doesn't work then ditch her, you don't need people making you feel bad

She’s jealous of you. Ditch her!

@ohthejoys21 you'd be better to say "you look amazing", rather than commenting directly on weight. Weight is such a sensitive topic for many people

It sounds like you need to learn the difference between knowing someone, having thngs in common with someone and a friend!

You don't have to be friends with everyone you meet/get talking to/have things in common with any more than you need to enter into a romantic relationship with someone who ticks your boxes.

If you don't enjoy someone's company or like how they behave or what they say, don't spend time with them. It's that simple.

She is using you to help her look after these kids. She doesn't give a shit if they break stuff in your house because it isn't (a) her house or (b) the house of the kids that she is minding, so their parents would be getting pissed off by the breakages.

Dump her!

I’m having the same problem at the moment.

The issue is it’s easy enough to dodge meeting up, but how do you diplomatically end all communication?

I know she will message me soon to say “How are you going?”. It seems a bit dramatic to ghost her, but I have no desire to let her know about my life.

We also have a lot of mutual friends and I know it’s not going to go down well if I ghost her as they won’t get it.

The "Taking a break from your phone" excuse and leaving it longer and longer to reply, with brief boring, noncommittal answers usually works.

I went though something like this with a friend and as harsh as it sounds, I ended up messaging her and saying, sorry, we can't be friends. You make me feel rubbish, your snide comments are too much for me and it's time to part ways.
Something to that fashion... She just replied basically saying suit yourself, bye... I blocked and unfriended and I've never looked back!
It needed to be cut and dry....

Ah, I didn't see the mutual friends bit
.. that makes things a bit trickier... But, with this type of person, you need to be clear!