175k salary and all gone

[175allgone]

This will ruffle some feathers, but after tax, mortgage , childcare, living expenses….there doesn’t seem much left. SE London, commuting, wrap around care. Whilst I appreciate I’m not having to watch my bills I’m hardly living an extravagant lifestyle.

@celestinegeode

If you can’t afford to live in the area you are bringing them up in and have no family support, then yes.

What a bizarre post. I was awake and reading Mumsnet at 2.30 am this morning, as I often am. I live in London, not overseas, and Im clearly not alone in using Mumsnet at this time, given the number of posts that are made late at night or early in the morning.

Consider living outside of London and you will be rolling in it.

If you can’t afford to live in the area you are bringing them up in and have no family support, then yes.

So all the young people priced out of their hometowns eg Cornwall, London etc should not have dc? And anyone who doesn’t have family support shouldn’t have dc? That’s a great idea!

It is not rocket science. It is the nursery bill. Have you considered a nanny?

In Islington, and many other parts of London, you would be lucky to get a house at all for £1m. I was confused by the OP's first post, however, where she said she lived in SE London but then talked about Islington.

My thoughts entirely!

I think it's bizarre anyone using the internet in the early hours when most people are sound asleep. Especially to keep posting till 3am but I guess it takes all sorts.

Ive reported the thread anyway as I have doubts.
Apologies in advance if it's genuine.

You only really have two options if you want to reduce your outgoings each month:

1. take out a loan or increase mortgage to cover childcare to spread it over a longer term.

2. reduce hours for whoever earns over 100k (or put the extra into pension etc. So that you qualify for the free hours and tax free childcare).

the lack of tax free childcare and free hours is probably your clincher.

fwiw we have 5 kids and only earn 65k between us but up north and with cheap childcare (£330 for the baby per month) and a 1.5k mortgage, we’re left with nearly 1k a month left over after putting some in savings. I think we’re comfy but no we can’t necessarily splurge on big holidays or treats, we’re saving up for those.

Who in earth are you paying to look after your kids, Supernanny???

I’d cut that bill ASAP - maybe drop down to 4 days per parent …

Don't know where she works from a commuting PoV but you can get more for your money even moving 5 miles outside Islington, and I think the areas are equally 'naice'

Easy, you just need to redefine extravagant.

The entitlement of many in London and the southeast is breathtaking, assuming the way in which they are accustomed to living is “the norm”.

Boggles the mind in all honesty.

Your lifestyle IS extravagant, even if you think it isn’t. Time to cut back dear. Cancel some subscriptions, shop somewhere cheaper, get fewer beauty and wellbeing treatments or take fewer and cheaper holidays.

Once you deduct childcare, you have £4.5k/month to play with. This is about what someone earning 75-80k would take home. So the top £100k of your salary is paying your nursery bill.

And you don’t see many people earning 75k with a house in Islington.

£4 k per month is not forever, though I'm guessing you'd like private school for your children? My childcare is currently nearly as much as my mortgage, it's just how it is.

Yes, childcare costs are the killer for so many people.

Is a nanny a cheaper option?
Ask for a payrise- even 5 percent when taxed will go someway to covering the childcare.
Have your kids adopted?

Oh yes, I am familiar with this. I had to take over my mum's mortgage before I had moved out, which was obviously very tough financially. When I suggested she downsized* she was outraged and found it astonishing that my DH and I would happily have lived in the smaller terraced 3 bed house that we were proposing for her. She quite often asked me whether I would send my DD to private school and was baffled when I said "with what?" as in her mind people who earn what we earn should have no problem paying mortgages on two houses plus funding private school from 5 🙄

*this was after I'd moved out with my DH and at a point when I'd begun to wonder why the vast majority of my income was going on my mum after I'd got married and had my own daughter, I should explain

Surely you make your life choices on what you can afford.

Most people may move out of London and perhaps not have had a second child if money is so tight (on £175,000)!!!!

When you say £4k childcare for two children, are they both in nursery? If so, would a day nanny not work out cheaper? If you already have a live-in nanny, again could you manage with a day nanny?

@Nanny0gg I completely agree. There are still lots of areas a few miles out don't be centre thst are lovely and still have character. Personally I hate the areas that have gentrified over recent years, and would never live in an area like that out of choice. It's happening in my area of south London and what has been a lovely working class area for the 50 years I've lived here has been overtaken by people buying up what were reasonably priced Victorian houses, sticking soulless extension boxes on the back, making the whole ground floor open plan, and destroying any character.

@175allgone is talking bollocks

If they were really earning £175k, 1 they would be hoofing loads into a pension right now, and 2 would have a nanny/hlhome help/ other

@CarterBeatsTheDevil sometimes I want to throttle mine but you win! 😆

Genuinely, what are the jobs that let people just “drop” down to four days a week? I work for an American company. It’s non-optional and I’d be fired. We asked to move to a different more affordable city with an office and we were told “no”. It was London or quit.

Living costs in London are what they are. Looking for a rental this summer was atrocious. Nursery costs are atrocious. Yes, you can move out of the city, but not everyone wants that commute to cut into family time.

Nursery should not cost anyone 4,000 pcm. It should be subsidized for everyone. The reaction to this should not be to tell people to leave London, work less, or quit jobs. This is a systemic problem in western societies that needs addressing.

Go on, do a list of how much you spend on what.

I sympathise with the gentrification argument but I'm not really sure what people are supposed to do. Not buy a house where they can afford because it might be considered gentrification?