Dd4 getting work wrong at school

[MelThomas1]

Hi,

Just wanted to know if anyone has been in a situation where their child can do the work at home but isn't doing it at school.

My daughter is 4 years old and she's been struggling with her phonics. She's in the higher ability group but the teacher said she isn't keeping up with the pace of the group. She has a spelling test twice a week with two different lots of spellings. She's been getting 1 or 2 or 0. But we haven't been practicing, tbh, as reading and other homework takes up enough time. But the teacher says she's getting simple spellings wrong like black, crab, train, etc. But at home she writes these words in a sentence with me just emphasising the letter that she can't hear, c-r-ab, b-l-ack.... She's writing amazing sentences at home using her phonics knowledge. But at school the teacher says she's not hearing the sounds and I've told them she has glue ear and is under a consultant for this, in the meantime she needs to lip read as well as hear.

What makes a child do the work at home but not in school? They keep saying they can't help her more. They've already put her next to the teacher and she's still getting the words wrong! I've uploaded photos on class dojo of the work she's done at home but they haven't said anything back.

What do I do?!

My dd says she doesn't want to make her teacher sad because her teacher gets sad if she gets her words wrong and she has a panic in the morning saying we didn't practice our words enough. And I have to tell her that it's okay to make mistakes and nobody should be getting sad by you getting your words wrong. We learn through mistakes.

I feel so sad for her. She's a capable girl and I know she has trouble with distinguishing between th and f and if a w word begins with wh or w and she will ask me to repeat again but aside from that I don't see the problems at home that they're mentioning.

OP when my child at 4 was diagnosed with glue ear, she was unable to hear almost all consonants and was missing a huge chunk of spoken speech. Poor little duck. It can be really significant.

Agree with everything said about doing all you can to stop any more pressure being put on your 4 year old!

My dd is the same. For the longest time I've been blaming myself and thinking what am I doing wrong with her speech. And it's taken a year and a half to get an ent appointment with a cancellation in between and the consultant diagnosed it. Did you get grommets? How did you support her in speech in the meantime?

In teaching communication is absolutely key. Putting this down to just 'words' and someone needing to point this out is astonishing. Surely by this point it should have been pointed out multiple times. Having 'a million and one things happening at once' is absolutely no excuse for the dreadful performance of this teacher, it really isn't. Are you a teacher may I ask?

Just do what she enjoys at home. No pressure. DD was an early reader but that's because we read a lot at home and she enjoys the stories. She wasn't doing the same at school at 4 - despite it being independent - but she could read. Follow her lead. 4 is far too early to worry about that she needs to be rolling in her mud kitchen outside.

Of course she'll make friends if she moves!

Firstly, look at the National Deaf Children's Society NDCS information about glue ear and how to have deaf-friendly classrooms. Your daughter does not need speech therapy; she needs to be able to hear.

Classrooms are noisy places. It's entirely possible that she can just hear better at home than at school. About 25-30% of under 5s have some degree of glue ear. It should be something that early years teachers know more about and they can make a difference.

It's increasingly common for audiologists to give low power hearing aids to children with glue ear. Ask your Audiologist or ENT if they would provide a bone conduction aid so that your daughter can hear now not in 6 months time. It's ridiculous for a child this age to be held back by hearing difficulties when a temporary hearing aid will allow her to hear everything.

Have you tried Otovent? It's one of the few evidence-based treatments for glue ear. It's available over the counter and is a balloon which the child blows up with their nose, opening up the eustachian tubes and ventilating the middle ear allowing the glue to clear.

Don't worry about discriminating th/f. It's the last minimal pair that most English-speaking children can discriminate and lots haven't resolved the difference until they are 5-6.

she has a hearing impairment - there is probably more background noise, and she can lip read at home because you are working with her 1:1 and probably closer than the teacher would be

& she's 4 FFS

If she can read and write at the right level for a 4 year old when she's at home it doesn't really matter how she does in school. You know she can do it.

Christ. Please tell me this is a joke.

Christ on a bike - she’s 4!!!!

Most kids are learning how to pick up/hold a pencil at that age!
I’ll have a word with the teacher and ask her to lay off the being sa bit. Too much pressure on child.

Don’t worry too much. Glue ear can make those high frequency sounds difficult to distinguish. That’s all x

Calm down. Let her just be four. Structured play and socialising well are the only things that really matter at that age. Enjoy her being four.

Sounds like hell. Your baby is only 4 years old!!! Ridiculous expectations

If she has seen an Audiologist as part of the glue ear referral, take the report
In.to school as evidence of the degree of her current hearing impairment. Ask for a referral to the support service for
hearing impaired children. They will also have a helpine the school can contact to gain additional support regarding her situation. Speech and language won't help with hearing impairment.

Wow that sounds like a lot of homework for reception, homework, reading learning spellings…

My DDs 6 & 10 do spellings once a week, never in reception.

Homework is half tremly and optional. Reading encouraged daily. As they progress through the school things like TTRS are introduced and extra learning activities, again all optional.

This sounds way too much. And as for the marks your dd is getting, I wouldn’t worry at all. You know she’s got glue ear, things will get better after her grommets are put in. Also don’t allow the school to put pressure on scores. My DDs regularly come home telling me they only got one spelling right, my response is oopppsss sorry I guess that’s my fault for not practicing with you. Because, yes I’m a crap mummy who regularly forgets to practice spellings with my DDs, it’s not stopping them doing well and being happy at school though.

Tell your daughter that the Teacher isn’t sad. The teacher is very proud of her of doing her very best. I found some children find it helpful to put their hand in front of their mouth when they can’t differentiate between two words that sound same to them - they may not hear the difference but they can feel the difference

My sons school teachers phonics based on ability so there is no class distinction. Reception, y1 and y2 all work together .

No tests until y2 phonics screening which I think they start mocks for at end of y1.

I'd definitely raise it, firstly she needs additional support in school as she probably can't hear the sound clearly so she needs a scribe.

Secondly the sad teacher reaction is inappropriate and definitely needs raising.

Phonics screening is Y1. Children who don't pass do it again in Y2.

Children with the type of hearing loss caused by glue ear can do phonics with everyone else as they are able to hear/discriminate/produce most sounds. They don't need to read and write through other methods.

I just wish audiology/ENT services had a sense of urgency about young children's hearing and didn't leave them unable to hear clearly. At the point where they are spending all day in busy, noisy classrooms and schools are putting so much effort into phonics, children need to be able to hear.

She's 4 with glue ear.

That effectively makes her deaf some of the time. Deaf people cannot listen and write at the same time. What the teacher can do is make sure your DD is looking at her/him when they say the word.

That's why she is writing at home but not at school, she is not hearing the word she needs to write down.

Also lip reading isn't easy with an unfamiliar face or someone that puts a book or a hand in front of their mouth.

Get yourself in front of a mirror and try mouthing the words, "beans" and "meat" they look identical.

Then mouth 'Van Gough' and see what it looks like.

That seems like a LOT of homework! My DS is in year 1 and has never had spellings brought home to learn. In reception the only homework was reading books and now he also has 1 worksheet a week given on a Friday and normally some sort of craft project in the holidays.
If you don't think this scool is a good fit gor your daugther and want to move her, after reception would be the best time!

Absolutely agree a discussion should be had with the head. Everytime parents see evidence of schools pushing for or teachers being under pressure to get results at the detriment to the children, they should speak up. It’s damaging.

I am a teacher. I'm not making excuses for the teacher at all. Of course it's not OK. I was actually just trying to be constructive for the sake of the op, in how to get something to change. Communication is key, of course it is, but teachers, like everyone else, have to learn their craft, and they will sometimes get it wrong and need support to improve.

I was a Reception teacher and I can quite imagine the pressure this teacher has been put under to do this. I don't think it's made up. The approach is wrong and its clearly not working if the SATs results aren't good but I believe it happens.

Most kids are able to pick up a pencil by the end of Reception and most can read and spell some cvc words. They don't just play all day in Reception although good planning can make them feel like they are i.e. not the pressure this child is getting.

I'm not excusing the teacher but at this time of year she will be preparing her 'data' to be put into the system and she will have been set targets herself by the Head. It's stinks but that's how it is.

She’s getting those words because she’s in the higher ability set. Get the teacher to give you the words she goes through everyday and spend 10mins a day doing a timed test with your DD.