To think I shouldn't have to justify my annual leave to my manager?

[Bubblegumtea]

Or anyone for that matter. I'm moving house and I had booked leave because I have some routine health appointments this week ( nothing work needs to know about ) and I didn't want any more medical appointments or sick pay to show on my payslips after I was ill in the new year as I know the mortgage companies look at these from when my mum had to supply loads more than the usual three to her work after she had a hysterectomy, just to confirm she was back at work basically and earning. Anyway, I've not made any mention of this at work and taken annual leave instead to cover these appointments to ensure I don't have any sick pay or anything showing up on my payslips and my god, the amount of people asking why I'm on leave this week ( this is fine if it's normal 'got any plans?' sort of chat ) and when I don't want to lie but also don't mention said appointments and say oh I just want to relax etc I get loads of responses 'you'll waste your leave', 'no point taking it', 'you are the worst for taking leave when you don't need to'... erm shutup? You have no idea what I'm taking leave for and it's none of your business. My manager even suggested I cancel it! I'm a part of a big team we, quite a lot of responsibility on me but we all do a similar job on the whole so no major impact by me being off. Aibu or is what someone does with their annual leave none of anyone's business? I never pry over colleagues lives like this!

Yanbu - none of their business
Yabu - they own your time outside of work aswell as inside of it

Omg yes I'd love a week off to sleep tbh lol

I normally tell them I've got a great life outside of work and am looking forward to not rushing for the week. Getting to sleep in and enjoy my life.

Just say you have some home stuff, may think about decorating & doing minor renovations.

I often take leave to just do nothing. Why the hell would that be a waste? They are rude and over stepping.

Perfect a slightly off-kilter stare and just shout “side quests!” whenever people ask.

I take two weeks off every Wimbledon when I just watch tennis the whole time. Leave is leave. It's no one's business what you do with it. If anyone asks I tell them "I'm off for a dirty fortnight with Hugh Jackman".

Leave is leave, its fine if its "doing anything nice?" but when they are suggeting you cancel it then thats a bit far.

"Just some personal business" or "having a break".

Not everyone is great with socialising and small talk. The way it’s going no one will feel comfortable striking up a conversation with anyone in case it somehow gets interpreted as offensive. And then theyll be a mumsnet thread about how someone took a lot of time off because they were being abused at home and not one colleague asked any questions how terrible is that.

I’d just say “Some personal stuff.” If they pushed for more, I’d let them know I wasn’t comfortable discussing it. You’re absolutely right that it’s none of their beeswax.

We book annual leave on an app. If we need a specific day/days/week/whatever time off, we put it on the comments. If more colleagues than required have booked the time off, those who put a reason - get it over those who book a random few days off.

Ah one of those teams lol

Who are these people you work with who think just relaxing is a waste of your leave?!

I'd very happily have a week off and do nothing.

I’ve never heard of medical appointments showing on pay slips, only statutory sick pay if you’ve gone over a week and had to get a GP note. I’d query this with your HR, as (going to be annoying) you really shouldn’t have to use annual leave but I do get your point. If you’re selling snd buying again, if you stay with same mortgage company it’s unlikely you’d need to even show payslips. If I was your manager I would be suggesting you use sick leave. But it’s no one else’s business. If someone in my team was using annual leave for medical stuff I’d start getting concern it was a precedent for others

Any time paid leave on my payslip is listed as annual leave if I booked time off. Medical and other authorised time off is listed as authorised leave. As the day I had off for DGM funeral was listed as authorised leave. But on the app for schedules, booking time off listed as bereavement

Normal office chat, I wouldn't get offended.

I would just say I need time off to catch up with home jobs, family and friends.

I’d always say I had big plans; need to go stay with my parents as have special occasions on, redecorating the house, going to Devon etc. That way you can’t be roped into coming back if they are short staffed.

This bank holiday week is one that lots of people will want off, because kids are off school. And it's a sort week so you xan have an entire week for 4 days leave.
Are they trying to work out if there is a reason for you wanting school holidays off?

I hear you. I work in the NHS where that stupid bloody Bradford score has made life incredibly difficult for at least the last 20 years. (This is the one where three absences in a rolling year triggers questioning, it has us all terrified to be off even when we are really sick as it can trigger dismissal and several people in my department are sole breadwinners.) University of Bradford denies all knowledge of ever having come up with it, I was once asked to track down the origin and had to give up.

We also have a new manager who has made it clear from the start that all annual leave requests will be scrutinised and debated in management meetings before being granted. I have some medical tests I am entitled to under Trust policy as they are to help manage a long term condition and I am having to justify every request with the appropriate policy.

From now on I'll be asking the specialist if they can make sure they send me confirmation of appointments as that will be next (manager can ask for this under the policy to be fair but my last Trust had a higher level of trust in its staff. This one has been quite a shock and I'm not sure how long I'll last).

New manager is keen to not only know everything people are doing but encourage others to question intrusively. I'm actually missing my last place of work where at least my manager knew the policies and abided by them. We also had a brilliant Equality and Diversity group that was excellent at supporting staff and WFH was much better supported. I do think this Trust is on dodgy legal ground in a few areas so am brushing up on my law.

It's all a bad joke when you have a long term health condition or disability, especially in the wake of COVID and all the vaccines so close together. No wonder the NHS is haemorrhaging staff.

Definitely better than our manager taking people into the office so show proof of their holiday plans because we were busy and he wanted them to cancel. HR we not aware he was doing this. Luckily he is now managing another department, unfortunately it's one that crosses over with ours so not far enough away for me

That's just normal office chatter. All you need to say is, ‘Getting things sorted to move house’. Which is true.

Do you think that because you don't want to tell them (perfectly understandable) and you don't like the question, your response sounds negative to them? Most people are delighted to talk about holiday plans so you perhaps sound hesitant compared to the normal flow of these conversations..

If it sounds like you don't really want to take it then they are perhaps responding to that.

Give a much firmer answer with a smile. 'yes really looking forward to sorting out all the house things we haven't had time to do and if we get through that we might have a couple of days out. Can't wait '.

You shouldn't have to tell them but it is a staple of office chat so being vague draws more attention. They probably think you have job interviews lined up and are fishing!

Do mortgage companies want to be informed whenever you're off sick these days?

It'll be the pattern of it that's confusing them. People like to put context in, and odds and sods of leave doesn't fit so triggers their spidey senses.

Sounds like office small talk. People are precious about their leave and if you are acting all mysterious about it you are making it sound like a bigger deal than it is.
In your shoes I'd be saying, ' oh I'm so ready for a break! Looking forward to having nothing to think about.'

No one really cares what you are going to be doing so just play the game to stop people asking more questions.

If you are salaried & take time off sick or for an appointment and you only get SSP then the days you take off can show as a deduction it happened with my husband (a teacher) when he was given a day off to attend an important event.