Team building days- do you hate them?

[Stressedgiraffe]

Inspire by a thread.
Why is there so much hate about team building days?
I've attended loads and organised some.
Usually they are ok, even fun sometimes but I've been lucky and generally like the people I work with. Some when I don't really like the team have been horrible.
I've got a team building event next week and will be doing everything that everyone seems to hate : travelling on the bank holiday to get there. 6 hours travel time. Staying in a hotel for 2 nights. 2 day team building . Travel 6 hours back.
But I'm looking forward to it. Hopefully it'll be fun.
So I guess my aibu
Aibu- team building is ok even fun!
Ainbu- team building is the spawn of the devil and all should be banned!

Old company used to do these and they were horrendous. Activities chosen for the few by the many that had nothing to do with work and actually caused more team divide than team building. New company has the right idea - quarterly meeting somewhere (not too far) away from the office where we get the chance to learn what others are doing, chat to those we might not see much and have a nice catered lunch with an early finish. Regular social events during work time throughout the year but these are optional.

Like Hell would I do this on a bank holiday though. YOU might not have much on but others will. If it’s typically a non-working day then you don’t agree to work on it without significant compensation and you should have the option to decline altogether. Anything else is madness.

My favorite team building story is one where senior management mandated that each team have a team building event, and my friend who is a team leader and an introvert organized hers at a coffee shop where each of the team, also mostly introverts, brought a book to read, which they did silently for most of the morning, then had a communal lunch and went home.

Fucking hate them, I'd rather have the portion of money you'd be spending on my travel, hotel, exercise, food/drink in an Amazon voucher as I'll still be exactly the same after an exercise, but I'd be happier as I could have bought something useful instead.

I've been on a couple of teambuildings that were basically just a day away hanging out, which I still hated because they were on a weekend eating into my free time, and sleazy behaviour from male colleagues was rampant. Once I decided I won't go anymore... well, it hasn't made any difference to my working life, nothing bad happened. Since then I just get to hear the post-mortem reports on who hooked up with who, or who groped and harassed who. I think if more people who hate these events had the guts to refuse, they would die a swift death.

The activities described in this thread though are shocking to me. Pasta towers? Den building? It sounds so childish. Why would anyone over the age of 12 put up with being forced into such silly behaviour?

It depends what it's like.

I've been on team-building days that were within working hours that I didn't have to travel for, and at which we got a nice lunch and most of us went for drinks afterwards. The activities were just fun stuff - creative things, quizzes with prizes, a Belbin/Myers-Brigg type personality analysis sort of thing. Everyone genuinely enjoyed it, as far as I'm aware. I work with really nice people and we generally get on well and have a laugh anyway and it was nice to be out of the office and use different bits of our brains for a day.

I've also been on team-building events that required tedious shit involving flipcharts and then having an awkward meal with a bunch of people I didn't like very much, while also having to try and keep up with all my emails and calls that I'd get on a normal day. That was fucking awful.

If I had to spend six hours travelling on a bank holiday to get to a team building event, I would be telling my employer to fuck right off.

I once did one where our boss hired a barge and we all just sunbathed, chatted, had a picnic and got pissed in glorious sunshine as we pootled down the canal.

yep hate them

don’t hate the folk I work with per say but I’d rather just be given the time off

I’ll be honest the people on here saying the ones they’ve done have been fun might be fine if that’s your idea of fun but for many of us days out with a group to theme park, bowling, salsa lessons, cocktail making, quiz nights, fancy dress etc are a long long long way from my idea of a fun activity.

I like the people I work with and happy to have a meal out a few times of year but any kind of activity day I’d rather Pull my own teeth out with pliers.

And no I’m not an anti social introvert, I just don’t enjoy activity days of enforced fun. A few drinks yes - team paddle boarding - fuck off

Belbin/Myers-Brigg type personality analysis sort of thing

And the results shared with the team? I think this is very questionable, and I doubt it's even legal where I live.

One firm I worked at held a 2 day personal development workshop for a number of employees across a number of offices. We had to do Myers Brigg test beforehand.

One of the tasks involved all of us being brought into a room, sitting at random tables. The leaders then waffled on about something and then left the room without giving clear instructions. The idea was (and we were meant to work this out ourselves) that everyone would get into their personality types and complete the task. Instead, we all sat there wondering what was going on and then chatted with the other people on our tables about where we were going on holiday and similar type of conversations. Leaders weren’t impressed when they came back!

This. Awkwardness on steroids.

I like the people I work with and socialise with them but I hate team building days unless it's just a meal out somewhere. I'm in my 50's, overweight, have very painful joints and am terrified of any water based activities. I find any sport related activities embarassing and am universally crap at any crafts. I'm good at quizzes but other people hate those.

Most team building stuff is humiliating to at least part of the team and this is something most organisers fail to take into account.

I'm rolling my eyes at the number of companies still using the discredited Myers-Briggs test. What an absolute waste of time and money.

**

We don’t do team building days at all for which I’m very grateful.
Work would just pile up not being done if we all buggered off for the day and we don’t have enough staff to cover the actual workload as it is.
We have 3 staff conferences a year which are all at head office, there’s a couple of hours of general updates and a bit of filler in the morning and then in the afternoon we can all go to the pub: that’s really appreciated by everyone, you can go home if you want or you can stay and socialise so it fits everyone’s wants and needs.
I like my colleagues and get on well with them and I’m not one of these people who thinks every spare second not working should be dedicated to family time, my circle is wide and I enjoy catching up with my friends but i don’t especially want to dedicate my own time to anything colleague based.

Only been on one and tbh I hated it. . No one seemed to be enjoying themselves and it added a further 30 minutes to my already long commute.

A pointless waste of time when I had a desk full of work with deadlines approaching fast. I managed to avoid the subsequent ones by "accidentally" scheduling client visits on the dates and then saying that was the only date the client's could do.

@tanstaafl Oh god! Ugh. I am cringing. Also he must've smelt lovely!
I am now thinking perhaps they did go into that theory at the time-in a way, I agree with the principle-of course morale is important. But their means of delivering that to us as a department was NOT successful at all as per this thread, I remember it, but for ALLLLL The wrong reasons! I have done various training positions at work since, and if I ever do again I would never ever use that!

I hate team-building days. I hate the people who plan them, who are usually infantile, self-important idiots.

My theory is that people who plan and enjoy these things don't have actual friends in real life.

I like them and think they are helpful. At the moment we have an unengaged new leader who has stopped all team meetings and my morale has plummeted. Feeling part of a bigger unit is important to me at work. Also, team bonding days make me feel valued. If you don’t stop the daily grind once in a while to reflect, it is counterproductive.

I agree team meetings are very important. And small gestures to build team morale are fine but whole days playing games and doing bonding exercises usually make most people cringe.

When I read that first I read 'doing bondage' 😂

My former workplace had loads of team building/away days etc. Always mandatory, usually involving hours of travel/overnight stay and usually with an evening where plenty of people drank heavily (with loads of encouragement).

In my early 20s I quite enjoyed them- there were a group of young colleagues who were friends anyway and everything was paid for. In my 30s/40s I felt that I had little enough time for fun stuff with my children, DH and actual friends. It was also a logistical nightmare to organise child care. Not to mention the fact that work was piling up so I had to work later before and after the away day to get on top of things.

What would really have helped build bonds in the team would have been leadership not taking on work that we didn't have capacity for, not expecting everyone to work silly hours and rewarding managers who took time to properly mentor junior staff. But all that stuff would have cut in to their profits more than a few quid for a weekend building rafts and getting pissed.

I've noticed that the sort of businesses that love 'team building days' also seem to make a lot of noise about diversity and inclusivity. I think that the typical team building event is the opposite of inclusive (in the true sense, not the 'wear a rainbow lanyard' sense). For example:

• They make life really difficult if you have caring responsibilities (most likely to be women) unless you have a stay at home partner who sorts all of that (most likely to be middle class men).
• They frequently involve alcohol which is problematic for some religions and for anyone who has overcome addiction. Also lots of free alcohol makes inappropriate behaviour from other colleagues more likely.
• Loads of the activities are not suitable for people with disabilities
• They often involve long days with travel, activities and staying in an unfamiliar place. Totally exhausting for people living with health conditions
• Some involve sharing rooms (or paying for your own room) which can be an issue for many people- eg. anyone with body image issues, health issues, hidden disabilities etc
• They take no account of the differences in people's personalities or the fact that some people really need quiet alone time to recharge and function

All of this. And also there is never effective management or facilitation at these events, so all that ends up happening is that it gives the loudest members of the group carte blanche to be even louder and more obnoxious with absolutely no respite for anybody else. And people come away feeling more disillusioned not to mention exhausted from having to deal with these characters for 16 hours a day rather than 8 hours a day.

And I'm no shrinking violet by any means and I do enjoy socialising at work when it happens naturally.

DH works for a business which spends literally thousands on lavish, glamorous, extravagant team building days.
He still won't go. And neither would I.

There you go - your next team building adventure sorted. Nice little place in Soho. Cocktails afterwards.

Mercifully I'm not working ATM 😂😂😂😂