Team building days- do you hate them?

[Stressedgiraffe]

Inspire by a thread.
Why is there so much hate about team building days?
I've attended loads and organised some.
Usually they are ok, even fun sometimes but I've been lucky and generally like the people I work with. Some when I don't really like the team have been horrible.
I've got a team building event next week and will be doing everything that everyone seems to hate : travelling on the bank holiday to get there. 6 hours travel time. Staying in a hotel for 2 nights. 2 day team building . Travel 6 hours back.
But I'm looking forward to it. Hopefully it'll be fun.
So I guess my aibu
Aibu- team building is ok even fun!
Ainbu- team building is the spawn of the devil and all should be banned!

No thanks, I have enough trouble wirh a full time workload pushed into my part time hours.
There's absolutely no way I'd be giving up my own free time to travel 6 hours for a work event.

@crumblingschools absolutely not! At the end we all had to give feedback and literally everyone told this guy he needed to chill. His response was « But we won! » so I suppose there was no point arguing with him.

what's your situation, OP? Partner? Kids? How old are they? Are you keen on a career or are you working to pay the rent/keep NI contributions up/childminder?
What kind of work do you do? does it really depend on actual good teamwork, or just everyone knowing their job/role and doing it?

I used to be in the Army. Basically a permanent team-building exercise. I loved it for the most part. Even the bits other people hated. It wasn't just a job to me though.

I worked for a manufacturing company (EMEA office, HQ in Asia) They flippin' LOVED team building. I also wanted to get on (promotions etc) but i wasn't necessarily wedded to the fact that i needed to team build with the finance and logistics departments, outside that we needed to work together and when everyone did their jobs, that was enough. However. Some of the days were good and combined with the annual summer party (so those "go ape" type things, sometimes, canooeing down a river - you were always in 4 person canoes and not with anyone from your team - etc etc. And they were great fun. Others, organised by HQ folks were more... esoteric and although we made the best out of them (building a table catapult from Chopsticks, elastics and a spoon and then shooting a projectile at a target - fun but i really didn't need to do that one. And the teams from other EMEA countries who travelled in? also not so much.

Am i travelling 6 hours on a bank holiday? I want 1 day TOIL and i will be in first class on a train or I'm not going. and i will have a single hotel room or i won't be there. Otherwise? sure, why not. When my DCs were smaller that would have been more difficult but if it would have been easy for DH to get time off? sure, otherwise: no thank you.

Team building day with just my immediate team, great. We’ve worked together for years & get on.

Team-building day with the whole department, I could stand it.

Going away for a weekend, god no. And if we were expected to share bedrooms I’d find a dozen different reasons why I couldn’t.

Just highlights how team building events are organised by people who don’t have a fucking clue. You are part of the team, no more/less than your team mates, the event should have been organised for the whole team.

If I was in your department and knew about this I would have refused to go and told them exactly why.

Sorry you manager did this to you.

And that’s fine if that’s your thing but your whole list is things that are the complete opposite to my idea of fun and to compel people to take part in those sorts of activities is my version of torture.

I'm going to do our first one ever in a few weeks..it's a day off work..what's not to like👍🏼

there is a big between a team day and a three day endurance trial

'This means team building isn't just a frothy nice to have. If I didnt make sure of constantly checking in, mental health plummeted. Nothing got done.'

Tbh that seems a problem with a toxic work culture, not team building.

DH has an 'escape rooms' work event at the end of the month, 6 hour round trip. He's reeeeeealllly looking forward to it . As it's on a Friday I would have usually gone with him and we'd have made a weekend of it but hotels are so expensive now it's not worth it.

I'm horrified that this has happened to you, definitely heads should roll over this! Our day would not go ahead if we could not accommodate a colleague in this (or any other compromising) position.

Can't stand overnight stays and activities. It's seldom adequately compensated (i.e. if you want me to travel on a bank holiday and stay overnight you should pay overtime for every single hour of that) because companies are cheeky enough to try and sell it as a perk. It's a money making scheme for the companies that run them, often based on outmoded theories of leadership and how teams work. A well-run team can bond during the working day. Want to reward people? Pay them more, offer flexibility, spend on more day to day perks like free coffee or subsidised travel. Don't make them make small talk with colleagues over a breakfast buffet before going bouldering/doing awkward party games.

And PLEASE don't assume everyone likes fucking sports! I once faked a dentist appointment to get out of a lunchtime rounders game but would happily have had a real one to be quite honest.

They a silly idea. Luckily seen be in NHS no team building events unless it's us eating chocolate given by patients in the staff room which looks like a stock room when we can grab 5 minutes...I've had more laughter and team building over that with my colleagues than any team building events prior to NHS.

I could have written this word for word. I've handed in my notice for this reason from a well paid leadership position. Just can't take the emotional pressure of being in a whole self, nurturing, purpose led org anymore. Everyone I work with is lovely, but so involved and like yours, constantly overthinking and questioning everything. I worry about them! I just want colleagues who are polite but crack on with their jobs and then go home. Did you change industries?

For me it really depends on the team and the management. I've largely hated them but started a new job last year and had our first one in December which was great. I think the reason it worked was because the compulsory stuff was all business relevant and anyone was able to sit out the 'fun' stuff if they wanted.
The day started with an icebreaker which was a dance class. Lots of people loved it, those who weren't into it grabbed a coffee and watched and supported those joining in - so no one was made to feel uncomfortable.
Lots of short snappy business updates from different departments, 'ted' talks from team members on any topic of their choosing (so some were work related some about hobbies or interests), Q&A with the board and excellent food bought in.
No building crap, no revealing anything about yourself, no forced fun.

These things are irrelevant, cringeworthy bullshit. Ego-massaging wank for incompetent management. If a business is well run and considerate of its employees, none of this bullshit is necessary. If it's badly run, this bullshit just emphasises it - especially when it's the "you are expected to attend on your day off" variety.

My dad is in hospital with a bleed to the brain. I have to navigate that, manage my step mum and mum, relay information to both as they don't speak english and don't really have any clue what's going on. Who will pay for the funeral? Half sister is going off the rails, dropped out of uni, dating a pothead, spending all day and night getting high.

Yet this Thursday I have to drag my arse to a 4 hour trauma informed workshop where I have to learn how to be respectful to those in the workplace who are having a bad time coping with their mental health. Organised by the JEDI (Justice, Equality, Diversity and Inclusion) "Lived Experience Producer" who recently felt her mental health needs were being unmet by her colleagues.

Shake my fucking head.

Depends on what you’re doing I think. I like a day out of the office doing something different and it does help you get to know people better. Some of the activities haven’t been up my street but you make the best of it.

I can do my job effectively without team building, it's a load of old shite. I don't need or want to be friends with my colleagues we already have a good working relationship without any team building. I find they actually do the opposite of team building. Someone who irritates you a bit ends up really pissing you off, team leaders get under your skin with all the over the top positivity and I'm just ready to get home and away from them all. The area managers were generally the worst and I lost respect for them completely.

I'm so glad the role I'm in doesn't have them now. I actually quit my role two before this one due to the over the top, excessive team building.

You know you’re not going to get a cross-section of opinions on here don’t you? MN is heavily skewed towards the introvert.

I don’t mind some team building activities and actually I’m lucky that I do genuinely like many of my colleagues.

but there is absolutely no way you’d get me happily travelling on a bank holiday to do a team building trip - and I work in travel and travel intensively for work.

Early 80's, the concept was quit new. Bank I worked for introduced this big plan for sending people off to Wales for an activity weekend in small groups.
Someone came back from the first one with a broken arm & cracked ribs,
The plan was quietly shelved.

They're a total waste of time and money.

Im both a private person and quite introverted and once I've stated that overtly I would prefer that it was respected rather than being bullied to pretend that extroversion was the "norm" and that I ought to be able to behave that way and learn to enjoy it.
It would be interesting to see a team building day where extroverts were forced to behave like introverts and being berated for not doing so. However it may just be my limited experience of the 15 or so I have been forced to attend.

Are you being paid for your travel time or receiving TOIL? With at least 1.5x for travelling on a BH?

Travelling 6hrs on a bank holiday?! No way. Fortunately my job (teaching) doesn't have team building days (although some schools do just for SLT, I think). I'm not an introvert, but I definitely don't like the sound of them. I imagine them as enforced fun, peppered with management-speak jargon.