if I HATE my cats?!

[bohemianbint]

Ok, yeah, probably. But they left the bottom half of a mouse on my kitchen floor this morning and I've spent the whole day in fear of finding (or worse, of DS finding) the top half. I had to get rid of it myself because DP had already gone and it was a nightmare; DS wouldn't be put down and I had to hold him and stop the cat escaping from the kitchen into the rest of the house with dismembered rodent in tow.

Disgusting creatures.

this thread has made me laugh! my cat drives me nuts now, i used to treat him like a pfb He's useless at hunting so that's one less thing to worry about, but he's very demanding, in/out all day long, constant demands for food, and generally gets under everyon's feet until he gets what he's after. And woe betide the dc if they get in his way, he's really volatile. Not forgetting that his favourite place to sleep is ds's cot if he manages to slip in unseen, and the regular throwing up.... I feel like i've fallen out of love with him!

belgianchoc - it sounds like we have the same cat!!!! mines a big, fat demading persian.

I particularly enjoy when you see them convulsing and pick them up and they are sick as you are carrying them out the door so trail of sick to clean OR they do that thing where they aren't sick in the one place (no far too easy) they have to walk backwards whilst being sick to ensure a trail!

Or you are just sitting down to dinner and the biggest one goes and does the smelliest poo in the litter tray and even though he's covered it it is something a Great Dane would be proud of and it stinks the whole house out (also very good if you have guests in).

this is a secret from dh. i also hate our cat. i have sympathy for her - he found her in a box at a bus stop at 11pm on a friday night when i was away working.

she wont eat food out of a bowl but drags it onto the middle of the floor. she splatters it everywhere - walls, chairs, cupboards. she wont use her litter box again after 2 uses. she takes notions for food - currently we can only use 3 packets out of a 12 pack. she mews and yowls constantly and when we do play with her, she sits and looks in a disinterested fashion. any clothing, towel, sleepsuit is henceforth a bed. she smells alot. she doesnt permit adults sleeping - no napping while baby naps in this house! we never get to stroke or pat her. her head is too small for her body and her belly sags on the ground. i think she looks plain, dh insists there is a bit of bengal in her.

dh fawns over her. he has a facebook album of her. she avoids him.

I hurt dh's feelings by not putting her pictures in nice new frames. I avoid her. she follows me round like a puppy but still stays out of petting reach.

i often mention "cat box, bus stop and a late night" to her. it seems to have no effect!

my 3 have bells on their collars now...they didn't used to have, and i used to leave the dining room window wide open for them to get in or out all day and one day i went into the dining room and saw a half eaten bird on the floor!!! I was horrified!! called DH at work in tears, and had to clean it myself before Ds came in and saw it!!....they've never been able to catch anything since they got bells on their collars!!

Oh how this thread has cheered me up. Thought I was the only one who thought "right, when we go away this weekend, wonder if (hope) our cat will find a new home"

Its that noise when he has a furball, starts retching in the kitchen (easy cleanable floor) but then rushes into the hall at the last minute and chucks up on the carpet.

And the complete inabilty to hit the litter tray. He's managed it perfectly well for 14 years but for the past fortnight has been overshooting and p**sing all over the floor.

I am seriously fed up with him

our cat has a strange fascination with water (arent they supposed to hate the stuff!!! ) She knocks down every glass of water in the house and bolts to the tap like a bat of hell when we turn them on!!! She rarely drinks water from her bowl, preferring fresh stuff direct from the tap!

Wish we had got a dog now!

sweetkitty you do know that its a cats perrogative to always be on the wrong side of the door/window don't you?

i've been pestering my DP to get a cat but he is very anti-pet and doesn't want one but after reading all of your experiences (PML) i think i will have a re-think!

my mother's cat, Billy, is hilarious! He lives with the most miserable cat in the history of cat, Molly. She is an older cat who likes to be left in piece. she is set in her ways and she hates to be moved from where she is sleeping (usually where you are about to sit) and will think nothing of giving you a well aimed swipe with her claw if you get in her way.

we call this the Billy Bash. now billy times his moment well. he waits patiently until molly has got herself nice and settled and has drifted off into a deep sleep. then ever so nonchalantly billy saunters over to where molly is snoozing and glances around (making sure the coast is clear) he sits and just watch her for a few minutes, then, with the skills of a professional he boxes the living daylights out of her head.. and legs it.

it is so funny to watch! poor molly looks so dazed and furious she really doesn't have a clue whats just happened! (although i don't have much sympathy for her, vicious piece of work that she is) god help you if you are siting next to her when the billy bash happens!

sorry for the long post, had to share!

See my thread

my cat won't sleep throught the night

Why do we put up with them and we love them at the same time.

mine sleeps through the night alright, unfortunately it just has to be on our bed, ini between us, and as he weighs in at 7kg, he's a PITA to try to move! when he does finally move the brown patch of hairs is horrible. He also has a really annoying habit - he masturbates, i mean really, that just drives me bonkers, he's castrated fgs, i don't get it at all. And when he does this it's as though he's in a trance. I've never heard of anyone else's cat doing this, reassure me i'm not alone, please?

my cat gets on my nerves too. She used to be like pfb, as someone else said, then dd came along she is a lovely cat but just when you think all is quite, dcs in bed, she starts meowing she leaves many many half mice/birds ocassional frogs lying around. Thankfully when we moved we did not put in a catflap. In our old house we had a lockable one but she worked out how to hit it at the right angle so it'd open problem was then other cats would come in but couldn't get out as it'd be stuck in the open from the outside position

WE got our cats when we weren't planning to have kids (at least for forseeable future).

Then ds arrived (a few years later).

Now they drive me up the wall.

The constant (and I mean 24/7) yowling.
The half eaten mice left lying around.
The cat shit.
The cat piss.
The stealing any food left out (even stuff cooking in saucepan).
The claw marks in the furniture.

Unfortunately dp and ds adore them. And the neurotic girl would never cope wtih leaving us.

SO I am stuck.

Glad to know I am not the only one.

oh and they smashed my food processor adn some of my nice pyrex stuff.

But yowling is the stuff that really gets to me.

It wouldn#t be so bad if they were quiet.

And if I ever find a cat swimming in my bath again I will go ballastic.

There is enough cat hair in this place as it is. I have a bath to wash it off - not collect more

Also sodden cat on MY bed is not a good thing.

Oh adn one is the heaviest footed creature you have ever met. Seriously sounds like a half-ton elephant wondering around the house.

ime, they've eaten the top half of the mouse. they like those bits.

Mine always leave the nose, tail and purple/green wobbly bits.

Lovely to step on first thing in the morning - really wakes you up!

I hate my cats at the moment too because they keep spraying so I live in a pig shit hole that stinks of rotting piss.

I have fantasies of killing them but then I remember the children.

They haven't started bringing in mice and birds yet but I'd sooner that than the piss.

One of mine sprayed up my computer screen this morning.

It still smells of piss, despite liberal use of "Urine Off"

I love my cat. I hate her too. She is an indoor cat, so no hunting, but she makes up for this by shredding every toilet roll that omes into the house, pissing on plastic bags, and shitting under the sofa in one of her two litter trays (in my two up two down terrace ffs) is fuller than she would like, or inexplicably sideways, or more than 7/16 of and inch too far to the left.

She will not eat chicken, she will not eat fish, salmon, ham, cheese, scrambled egg, anything a normal cat goes wild for. She will eat supermarket brand chunks in jelly, and Gocat crunchies.

She would prefer, above ALL things, to eat earwax straight of of my son's ear. She attacks my kids in the morning, scratching and leaping - ds2 is covered!

But she looks like little bengal leopard - given her origins, I suspect someone's pedigree bengal male got out and rogered the local brown tabby! She looks just like this

vulgar, try using biological washing liquid in warm water to remove the urine smell.

My cat is a beautiful beautiful long haired cat who loves cuddles and affection. For this we love him.

Unfortunately every time he manages to eat anything other than his own cat food he gets violent diarrhoea which dribbles down his long fur and gets stuck there. Then he walks around the house sitting down leaving poo everywhere.

Occasionally he likes to climb on top of me when I am asleep and widdle on me or my husband.

At these times we hate him. With a passion.

I love my cats dearly - but right now I'm not loving their fur everywhere! With baby on its way, I'm nesting and whereas I used to love having the cats sleep on our bed with us, I now hate it because they leave fur everywhere! They are now banned from the bedrooms! (And they know it and hate it!)

My cat also goes by the name of Shit Head.
She has wrecked our newly carpeted stairs using them as the scratch post from heaven, brings loads of shite in and sneaks into the kids beds at night.
Wanders past me in the kitchen, carrying a pair of ds's underpants in her mouth.
We have found a pile of little undies and odd socks stashed behind a cupboard.
Stands on her hind legs furiously scratching the window growling.
Has left 3 mice this week. 2 of them headless but the kids love her even though she attacks them on a daily basis I'd love to get rid of the Shit Head but i cant bring myself to do it.
This thread has made me laugh...glad its not just me then

smug - yr cat is like ours!! wonder if that bengal did a tour while he was out and about!!

Do any of yours try to kill you on a daily basis? We have 2 atm, but an earlier cat (who packed her bags and left one night so chin up, there's hope for you all yet) used to run from side to side across each stair as I was coming down, making sure she was always going sideways one stair ahead of me.

She only ever tried to kill me, never Dh or the DCs. I don't think DD has ever fully accepted that I didn't pack the cat's bag for her and send her on her way.
Now we're left with old, stupid cat and annoyingly chirpy kitten - they'll never be as good as my old old cat who lived to 17.

neurotic one used to steal knickers (always mine, pref dirty) and occasionally teatowels and socks.

She used to wait till someone was at the door, and then drop a pair of my dirty kecks in the hallway