I've been with my husband for 20 years. We have a 10 year old and for the most part we've had a great relationship. He really is my best friend. I don't know if he's getting more gross with age or I'm getting more intolerant in my perimenopausal age, but he's starting to really gross me out and I'm losing attraction for him fast.
He's some recent things I've noticed him doing over the past year:
- Hands always down his trousers. The bathroom is littered with pubes but now all around the house. I've found a pube on the water jug in the fridge and even once on my plate.
- Rubs his nose then doesn't wash his hands. He's got a lot of allergies so itches his nose a lot. I have to tell him to wash his hands or he doesn't do it.
- Shit stain in the bed. This has only happened once, but it's once too many.
- He sneezed phlegm onto his arm and then licked it up. Yes, I'm serious.
I've pulled him up on this many times and he just days "I'm a gross man, what do you expect".
He didn't used to be like this so I don't know what's happening. He gets defensive when I pull him up on it.
Other than that, we get on so well mostly. We share the load pretty equally, he's a great cook and terrific father. But I'm finding his habits hard to live. It's hard enough to keep the fire going after 20 years without this.
Am I being unreasonable? Any advice? Anyone else relate?