4 year old getting pierced ears at Superdrug

[Childpiercinggate]

I was browsing in Superdrug this lunchtime and saw a small child getting their ears pierced. It was awful, the mother was holding the child down and she was yelling at the top of her lungs. I was in the makeup section at the other end of the shop and stopped in my tracks as I’ve never heard anything like it.

I asked to speak to the manager as I was so shocked that they do this in store. The manager told me it was nothing to do with me and the mother had given consent.

Ive written to the head office although I know nothing will be done.

Yes you were unreasonable - mind your own business
No you’re not unreasonable - you’re right, children of that age shouldn’t be getting piercings

My mum just said no. I could have them done at 16 and that was the end of it
I didn't dare ask again as I knew what the answer would be
I held off until a week before my 16th birthday and was terrified she would go mad

You absolutely did the correct thing. It is a disgusting practice and I will write to Head Office in solidarity asking why children that are not old enough to consent are allowed to be subjected to this barbaric abuse in the name of profit.

Anyone who gets their kids ears pierced (without the kids asking for it to be done) is awful imo. Even worse for babies! Only people I know who did it are chavs.

I don’t think it should be done until age 8 earliest ideally 10.

I doubt anyone would be ok to hold down a small child to get a small cute tattoo yet it’s ok to put permanent holes in their ears?

I love how people are acting so superior over other cultures who pierce their babies ears, like their own culture is perfect.

In my country, dropping off a baby to nursery for 8 hours a day would be looked at with disgust. Some of you are just so ignorant that you can't open your mind up to other ways of living.

This is actually quite thought provoking. I don't think banning piercing up to a particular age is the answer. Likewise its not the same as vaccination as benefits outweigh bad etc, but I don't think its child abuse either. There also may be negative consequences for not getting piercing done, depending on the culture. However I 100% agree the procedure needed to stop there until the child was calmed down, whether that was 10 mins later with lollipop in mouth or 2 days or even a year later. That responsibility lies both with the parent and the shop, the shop should have a duty to the child if the parent doesn't do the right thing.

I worked in a shoe shop and toddlers would scream blue murder getting feet measured or putting on shoes. I was asked to hold a child down once. My own child screamed when restrained in a buggy, literally pulling hair out and scratching his face. I gave up leaving the house with him unless by car, most people thought I was being soft but they hadn't witnessed the severity of his reaction. I left a hairdressers twice, he had an aversion to people touching his hair or head. However I strapped him down while he screamed and clawed when getting anaesthetic for a procedure. These are my own examples but all could be debated at to what response was right.

A person does not have to live in a culture that is perfect in every way in order to hold an opinion on child assault. That is an irrelevance.

Dont be ridiculous it doesn't even compare iv spent most of my life in therapy because of childhood sexual abuse/rape I assure you I have never discussed my piercings with a mh worker as its just not that big a deal or had any impact on my life whatsoever. I also can't imagine their is anyone having years of trauma therapy because they had their ears pierced as a young child.

Well, dropping babies off at nursery for the majority of their toddler hood, or underage sex, drinking or smoking don't cause half as much damage as baby ear piercing perhaps

I'm sure all the people with real- life examples on this thread of the life -altering trauma they've experienced due to ear piercing would beg to differ! I'm sure a few will be along soon to tell you how much deep-seated trauma they have and counselling they've had to undergo. I'm sorry for what you've had to go through and hope the therapy is helping🙏

I'm not sure anyone is really comparing the seriousness of FGM to ear piercing it's just when people start using 'its a cultural thing' as a reason for doing things to young babies who have no choice, it's not unreasonable to point out that for many reasons that's not an excuse.

Precisely @Jc2001
Why is it culturally acceptable to pierce a baby's ears? What is the history behind it?

I'd love to hear stories from other mumsnetters who have had years of trauma therapy on the nhs for having their ears pierced at such a young age. Like you say il wait for them all to start rolling in on this thread as I'm really interested to hear about it

I'm sorry for what you've been through and I'm sorry that anyone thinks that they can lump rape and ear piercing in together.

Hysterical nonsense on their part. I'm so appalled about what that poster said that at first I thought it was satire.

@SeeBeMe can you take a moment to reflect on your post please. For the murdered children and survivors out there whose pain and suffering you are minimising as a point if comparison to win an argument.

Quite right! And we shouldn't at all be swayed by the "straw man debate" that there are other actual deeply painful and damaging examples of child assault that will affect people's lives everyday. I'm sure many people will agree with you that ear piercing is just as bad

@CommentNow hopefully people on the thread will see from what you've said (and others) that there are many many more damaging things done to children and perhaps, just perhaps ear piercing doesn't rank anywhere as highly as other things that are rightly classified as actual crimes

It sickens me that parents do this to young children and now I am appalled to learn that Superdrug carry out the procedure.

How can any parent willingly inflict pain and suffering on their children for fashions sake. I know it is common in some cultures but I do not get it. It should be illegal. I feel sick thinking about it.

Well done for having a go. Would be interesting to see what you response you get from Superdrug.

You sound completely unhinged.

Ear piercing ranks up there with other forms of child abuse like beating, starvation and rape that you see it in the media all the time with children ending up losing their lives. I was honestly expecting this to be sarcasm!!

And yes, smoking is definitely not as damaging as ear piercing... Lung diease and cancer is clearly nothing compared to a pierced ear. (<= now that was actual sarcasm)...

Apologies, I definitely need to work on my sarcasm, yes I was trying ( and obviously failing) to be sarcastic!

I think it depends on the child.

I wouldn't want my child to get them done if they were screaming or upset about it. My daughter got hers done when she was 5, at the beginning of the school holiday between the end of reception and the start of year 1. She'd been asking for ages (since the start of reception) and I told her that it would hurt and there would be aftercare for a few weeks after. She was very sensible and understood all this and I told her she could change her mind. But she didn't. She had them pierced and didn't cry. She did say after that it hurt but not enough to put her off having the other one done.

I initially assumed you were but after your second update...

Maybe I just didn´t pick up on it. Apologies on my part as well.

No worries at all, I didn't help by adding the dropping babies at nursery bit, I didn't mean that but couldn't edit it out!

If you read the thread you'll see that many of us are objecting to knowingly and will fully subjecting a child to pain. So they can wear a fucking earring. And especially in very young kids they get no benefit whatsoever

Other than that (and the awful practices of FGM) we've not commented on other cultural practices? So massive generalisation there.

Although comparisons to use of nursery are very bloody weird. This harms a child how?!!

People calling it ‘pearl-clutching’ and a UK thing ti dislike the piercing gun, not the case at all. The APP has been spreading the word of why guns are not good for years now, they’re an USA-based organisation. There’s a UK branch of the organisation too, and professional piercers worldwide who try to encourage people to make good choices and get their piercings done safely.
Sure, you may have had your ears done at Claire’s in the 90s and they look great and healed fine, good for you. I had mine pierced at Claire’s aged 6 and they healed okay but they’re both off centre. You might think differently about if the risk is worth it if you’ve ever had to try and remove a disgusting cheap mystery metal back from a crying child’s ear, and had to send them to go and get checked at the hospital as it looks infected. This is something I have, as a piercer, had to do. It sucks.
If you have the knowledge which is easily accessible it’s just irresponsible using outdated techniques because you know a real piercer won’t go near a young child but the 18 year-old shop assistance at Claire’s will. Does my head in.

Thanks for this input. I was accused on here of being a pearl clutcher; I don’t know what a pearl clutcher looks like in life but l am a bi-sexual 40 something female with 3 ear piercings, a pierced nose and due to have my nipples pierced shortly (needle of course). I don’t think l subscribe to the definition in the pearl clutching handbook. 🤣 The big difference is that l am an adult making my own choices about my body!

Back to the issue in question, surely if a gun is used the residue from the hole has to go somewhere which can’t be hygienic.

And for those saying they had piercings as a child without a problem, there is another issue; what about in her teens if she decides she didn’t want pierced ears?

I got mine pierced for the first time just before I was 21, it was in a local shop with a gun. It was ok, not great, I stopped wearing earrings when my children were babies as they would pull on them, and the holes closed up, but I could still push goo out of one of them.

I always said to my girls that they would have to wait until they were 18 and could sign their own paperwork, but when DD1 was 15 she asked if she could have it done. We talked about it, and agreed that she could after her GCSEs, as that would give her ears a long time to heal before she had to removed them for school, and also 6 months to change her mind.

We researched it and I took her to the local tattoo shop and the qualified piercer did her ears and repierced mine. It worked out cheaper than Claires as we didn't have to buy fancy cleaning packs, just clean cotton wool, boiled water and time.

It was a whole better experience than the first time and I am really glad we waited. It was hard when they were younger as in Primary school it seemed that all the girls were getting their ears pierced, and of course they didn't like being the odd one out.