Vegan and work night out

[ChockysChimichanga]

Genuinely a bit unsure if I’m being unreasonable here, hence the thread!

I’m organising dinner and drinks for a group of work colleagues. Nothing fancy, just food and drinks. The venue we chose is a local pub with a decent menu. However, one colleague has said he doesn’t like either of the vegan options and wants to go to a very different restaurant. No-one else wants to go there. Colleague has now announced he’s not coming and is annoyed with me.

I felt quite guilty initially and spent some time trying to find another pub/restaurant with more vegan food but there aren’t really any suitable and having slept on it, I now feel that he’s being a bit of a twat about it.

I get that he wants to have a nice meal (and in fact I’m vegetarian so I do understand) but there is vegan food there, he just doesn’t fancy it.

AIBU to stick with the original venue or should I try and accommodate him more?

How many of you are there, how many veggies or others who might be interested in a nice veggie option? If there's sufficient numbers, check with the pub if they'd agree to doing a special if there's a guaranteed number of eaters.

As a vegan, I’d just go with it. I’d eat before or after if it was that bad.

Out of interest, what are the options. Some pub chain vegan food is horrendous in fairness. 😅

We usually go somewhere that suits everyone though.

As they have two vegan options he’s being really unreasonable. He just doesn’t fancy it is being really crap - others obviously don’t fancy his choice! Why does he trump everyone else?

Fussy eater AND vegan - what a nightmare combination.

I'm veggie too and voted YANBU. It's acceptance really, most pubs etc do appalling vegan and veggie food but they're all as bad as each other. If I go out in a group I've resigned myself to not enjoying the food but enjoying the company. And will often just order chips and salad. If it were a steak house or something like that you would be unreasonable as that would be actively excluding him but you're a veggie yourself and have chosen a place with options. Good idea for them to organise the next one.

I’m veggie and one of our works meals was at Miller and Carter! I like the baked cheese mushroom starter so just asked for a larger portion of it for a main. I’m sure if he asked they’d accommodate him somehow.

Not enough to warrant a special dinner unfortunately! I think it’ll probably end up being 8-10 people and no others have dietary preferences apart from me but I’m happy with the things on the menu.

Thank you all, this has been really helpful. His reaction made me think I was being unreasonable and you’ve all basically confirmed my burgeoning feeling that he’s being a twat.

He can have beer and crisp

You know what every Easter our work goes out for an India, I don't like India so I don't go. I don't make big deal of it and I don't make them change their plans. He doesn't want to go so don't worry about it.

You can't start asking people ahead of the day if they want to"a nice veggie option", I will decide on the day what I want to eat, be it veggie or a sirloin steak! 🥩

He's being a sulky twat.

I am vegan and would be grateful there was more than one option tbh.

Miller & Carter’s pretty rubbish as a meat eater TBH so you’re not really missing out 😁

Miller and Carter is all hype Ithink,

we got a voucher for Christmas and I was really underwhelmed, I mean it was fine but not worth the hype imo.

Yep, mediocre at best. I quite like their onion loaf though.

He can organise the evening next time 👍

There was someone on the Internet making the onion loaf I watched a reel today looked delicious.

You say he suggested somewhere, why was that not suitable? Different price point? Vegan exclusive? Or just not a pub

What are the 2 vegan options and what was his issue with them?

I am veggie and if I can't find anything can make do with chips and a salad.

Vegan for a LONG time and the option used to be chips - happy with anything tbh

How do you know someone’s a vegan?…..

His diet is a personal choice, not a medical requirement. As the venue actually provides a meal that complies with his personal choice, you have made perfectly suitable arrangements.

as someone who has to follow a very strict medical diet, I often have little to no choice in food. I have been in restaurants or at work meals where there was not a single allergen free item available. That is what it means to be excluded.

The place he suggested is more expensive and not near public transport. It’s also an Asian restaurant and other people wanted pub food this time because we’ve always previously been to curry or Turkish places.

I’ll never forget the time I went on a date in the 90s and ordered the veggie lasagne - usually that was the only thing on the menu!

It arrived and they’d clearly microwaved it to death as I couldn’t even get a fork into it. It was solid. I called the server over to explain and they basically blamed me for being vegetarian and said ‘well, our kitchen is used to cooking meat’.

I had a bowl of chips instead. 😂

He can organise the next one then...

I honestly thought this was going to involve you saying there was no proper vegan option and you were going with the majority. Also think he's being unreasonable and I'm vegan too. One option for a works meal is survivable. Two is absolutely fine