To find that going to the doctors doesn't resolve the issue

[Mairzydotes]

I've recently had an appointment and it's got me thinking that I always feel fobbed off ( I feel a bit fobbed off with this one too)and they never solve the issue.

Once I had been referred for a scan , and when I spoke to a clinician for a follow up, I was told the nurse who referred me was working their notice and was referring everyone , and they wouldn't be doing anything further.

The only time I've ever felt like my issues have been taken seriously, and dealt with was in pregnancy, when my pre-eclampsia showed up in my ante- natal check up.

Some people make appointments and it seems like the health care professionals bend over backwards to help them and I feel dismissed. And these are about physical things , that can be seen . I dread to think what mental health would be like.

Does anyone else find this happens to them?

It took me 3 years to convince the GPs that I did, in fact, have a chronic illness that needed medication.

Every. Single. Time. I have been to the drs in my adult life I have been robbed off and found my own solutions.

It's shit.

Trying to get an appointment for 2 months only to get one on the app for mid June at a sister surgery a few miles away. I email to let my surgery know that I have done this and will bring up issues then as I can't get through to them (Dr phone numbers all have a recorded message saying the surgery is busy and they cannot take call, if an emergency call 999, then hangs up). I get an email back saying my appointment isn't even with a Dr but an Assistant, who won't be able to help with what I've outlined in my email. They suggest I make an appointment.

FFS!

I emailed back and said the very reason I am emailing is because for 2 months I have been calling their number every day at various times to be hung up on. I ask if there is a magic number or alternative way to create an appointment with a doctor as I had tried app and phone and these don't work.

Email reply " You can come in to the surgery and make an appointment face to face."

So why are we paying for the app? Why are we paying for their phone lines/phones/answerphones? I have to drive to my surgery (which has no free parking as it has merged with the hospital) go in and wait to make an appt for another day (god knows when), then do the whole drive back/pay for parking again? Yet they seem to think it needs a Dr, so relatively important.

Well done Tories.

I'm sure I got fobbed off at the doctors under the Labour government too.

Oh , the stupid app. It's actually easier to sit on hold than it is to type things in on the app, if you have other things to do .

It sounds absolutely shite, OP, I’m sorry.

It is nigh on impossible to see a GP where I am. I have developed a condition which is a possible early indicator of a stroke. NICE guidelines say GP must rule out urgently before doing a (much less urgent) referral. Nah - seen by a nurse, who after 2 months of chasing, has finally got me referred. That’s before any waitlist. Let’s hope I don’t drop dead in the meantime!

I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling utterly abandoned and generally uncared for when it comes to health - and I’m a reasonably savvy, articulate and strong willed person. It’s just so bloody EXHAUSTING, isn’t it?

I think it depends on the GP you have in some cases. One I went to see about pain told me I was just getting old! Not the case, I needed to see an osteopath so I pay privately to see one. I only knew who I needed because I told a colleague of the issues I was having and he gave me a name of someone he used.

I’m finding the GP refers me to totally random places. I have a prolapse but I can’t get a physio referral or a gynae one either apparently they won’t accept me so instead I got sent to the continence clinic since they were the only ones open to referral?! Thatwas a total waste of time for everyone and now I’m just left to get worse 🤷‍♀️.

I get it op. I go to the dr (maybe every 5 years) and say X and Y and sometimes Z and they always say that’s nothing. Fine, I’m not looking to be ill but Dh goes and always gets investigations or at least an explanation. Last time it was for a lump in my leg, which i was confidently told was indeed a lump they way you would tell a toddler who brought you a leaf.

only once I saw a locum because i needed a sick note for tonsillitis which had gone on more than a week. The dr tried to make me go to hospital and gave me prescriptions that needed a carrier bag from the pharmacy. Didn’t have the heart to tell him I was feeling much better but not quite ready for work and the gp had seen me worse and recommended taking it easy at work.

I wouldn't be surprised if sending to to the wrong clinic triggered your case to be closed, and you have to start the whole process again

There probably is a lot of misogyny involved too.

I've had a couple of scares in last few years and been seen within days and referred. The Dr's themselves are lovely and reassuring but they seem so overwhelmed and exhausted. It's an awful situation. The thing I find hard is no follow up, I've had various testing over 5 years to go on HRT. In the meantime I've had MH drugs prescribed as I seem to still have to wait but don't know why. I have a psychiatrist as I have quite a serious diagnosed condition. I'm on meds but when I suggest other reasons for the symptoms, trauma, menopause, other things. I feel disbelieved and as though the psychiatrist is quite rigid in their way of treating patients. I get that MH is their speciality but I'm getting increasingly annoyed at menopause etc not being explored. I could feel despondent because it's such an act of trust to put your sanity and health in their hands.

I have 2 different assessments for DC, both stalled, because I got an appointment, took them in to be seen, doc agreed there was an issue, but instead of referring on into the system, sent me home with lots of paperwork and forms to complete, get school to complete etc. I will do them of course, but they're on the pile with sorting out the mortgage, my DMs POA and finances, and other critical life admin, and i feel as though the professionals should be picking this up from here rather than just handing it back. Similarly i have a dental referral which has gone on literally for years of lost messages and needing to re-issue the referral request, which each time is on me to pick up and liaise over. I get that the actual people involved are busy and doing their best and the system doesn't provide for these things to be handled, but the overall effect is that patients aren't receiving care

I had an allergic reaction to something and my eye lids swelled. I called the gp and the receptionist insisted that because it was an eye issue I had to use the nhs emergency optician pathway. I argued but she made out I was a Karen and so I gave up and went to the optician who said “er well I’m not a dermatologist so I’m not sure what I’m meant to do!” She was lovely but frustrated too as I needed a gp not an optician.

i had to call the gp again and explain to the receptionist I’d seen the optician and now really needed a gp appointment. I was put on the call list but instead of a call I got a text telling me to take anti histamines… I have multiple allergies and take antihistamines most days ffs. The final time I called reception I was in tears. My face was swollen and painful and I couldn’t access help. After that I finally got a call from my gp and the steroids I needed!

I know this is all anecdotal, but it’s shocking. Please vote right, people.

Yes. I had shingles a while ago and it occurred to me it was the first time I could remember where I'd gone to the GP with a problem, it was taken seriously, and it was sorted appropriately quickly.

It took so long for my multiple sclerosis symptoms to be taken seriously that it affected my health in the long term. Since that diagnosis, I thought I'd be seen a bit less like as the 'complainy young woman' stereotype and trusted a bit more that my symptoms weren't imagined, but I still feel I really have to fight to even have symptoms believed by GPs.

I think in my case it was probably just unfortunate that I had a condition where the symptoms can be vague and non-specific, and most people presenting initially with similar symptoms don't have MS, but I do think this is a broader issue in terms of how women are sometimes perceived by healthcare providers.

I totally believe all of these stories and agree that people aren't getting the care they need.

That said, I come from Ireland where you have to pay for the GP (60 euros a pop last time I was there, I dread to think what it is now) and after 15 years in the UK I still cannot get my head around how often people here go to the GP for things that, to me, seem entirely trivial. I would never ever go to the doctor because I had a sore throat for three days for example - I would only go if I was really ill and felt I needed antibiotics or there was visible pus. My cousin took her young son to the GP a couple of months back because he had a small patch of dry skin on his face. I couldn't get my head around it - I did ask her what she expected the GP to do but she couldn't really tell me. The GP, predictably, told her to put a gentle moisturiser on it and come back if it got worse. Total waste of an appointment.

I am absolutely not in favour of charging for GP appointments but I have to say being charged for them does make you value them! I'm not sure what the solution is.

Completely agree, it’s an absolute mess.

I’ve been struggling with digestive issues for almost a year. Had multiple tests etc and they won’t refer me as the test for bowel cancer came back clear. I’ve been fobbed off with ‘post-infection IBS’, but they still won’t even put me on the waiting list to see a specialist.

I’ve had a different health problem recently and I’ve gone private because I just can’t be arsed with the hassle.

It's not about the Tories, it's about NHS culture and how medical professionals are trained.

I was repeatedly told there was nothing physically wrong with me and I was "just anxious". Sent away with "patient just anxious". Then I nearly died and ended up in resus. I was anxious because I was seriously physically ill. Fuckers.

Any medical professional who tries to dismiss me with the "you're just anxious" line gets short shrift now. But I still only really get traction with that because my medical records document their previous fuck-up with diagnostic over shadowing (/misogyny).

My biggest lesson from NHS wards is that only the pushy assertive people receive appropriate care. If you're polite and quiet and accepting, you will at best be neglected. You have to stand up for yourself because they don't give a shit about you.

I don't think the issue was presenting with vague symptoms, but being a woman presenting with symptoms - whether vague or specific.

Like you, my late diagnosis (not MS) resulted in poorer long term health outcomes and prognosis.

Fighting to be believed isn't just you, if that's any tiny comfort.

When we my dd had chicken pox , we had to cancel our plans , and I was asked if we'd been to the doctors. A lot of illnesses run their course.

It is shocking, but I think some people are of the opinion that all discomfort should be medicated.

Quite often they try and sent patients to the pharmacy, who can't always help.

I get digestive issues which I now believe to be mostly anxiety, but anxiety was never suggested as a possible cause.

I was just told to take immodium and sent on my way.

Yep

20years of being fobbed off
Heres GPS responses I had before I finally got somewhere

Me. I have no energy or motivation….GP…..you’ve got twins what do you expect
Me. My hairs falling out……..GP…. Me too ( laughs )

For 20years!
Then
Me. I have pins and needles….GP…come back if you’ve had it consistently for 6months
5months Later
Me. I still have pins and needles……GP…..I said 6months

Me. I have pins and needles….Private GP……..Any other symptoms……Me….yes my hair has been falling out for years and I have absolutely no energy or motivation…..Private GP…let’s take your bloods it could be a vitamin b12 deficiency
A week later
Private GP….yes your b12 is at 150 which is very very low, must have been coming on for a long time you should have contacted your GP years ago ( 🤯😳) and now you have permanent nerve damage!!!

The moral of this story is

1. Go private
2. Refuse to leave your GPS till they actually treat you.

I was fobbed off for several years. It was definitely wind pain related to IBS, then definitely a UTI, bloating and abdominal pain...that's IBS, hang on are you stressed at work it could be anxiety. Nope it was a whacking great big thankfully benign ovarian cyst. One trip to A&E resulting in emergency surgery later all my symptoms magically disappeared.

I now find telling them my sons a doctor gets them jumping through hoops !
That should never be the case though!

Went to the Dr's three times in two years due to feeling exhausted but sleepless and losing or failing to gain weight

Did a blood test for anaemia - not anaemia

Questioned about my diet and told to eat more

Told to re-evaluate my lifestyle.

A year later, my legs and ankles ballooned. I saw a Dr privately - I had such severe hyperthyroidism, it was affecting my heart by then.

When asking for a repeat for HRT, the lady GP told me if I gave up work, I'd find menopause easier to deal with.

After an accident when I thought I'd broken a vertebrae (had broken one previously due to osteoporosis, possibly severe due to undiagnosed hyperthyroidism for three years), I was dismissed at the hospital and when I went to the GP she asked me to touch my toes. I could get to my shins, therefore I could not have a broken back. How I liked sending her the MRI report. T12 broken - when I had the accident.

I'm very assertive with them now and ask them to note I requested x and they refused. Works wonders.

It's been going on for years but post covid the British love affair with the NHS has ended.

Nowadays I just pay.