Put your frikking babies to bed!

[Plsdiscuss]

I went for a very exclusive dinner Saturday night. I'd been looking forward to it for ages. £150 per head place, which is a huge splurge for us.

A family of 4 were seated next to us at their 7.45pm arrival. The (about) 3 yr old was 50% pacified. The (about) 9 month old in the high chair squawked for about 30 mins then fell asleep, looking very uncomfortable slumped over the side of the highchair.

If their noise wasn't bad enough, I could hear another child crying in another part of the restaurant for about an hour. That child's noise got louder as they were pushed in their pram crossing the restaurant to leave around 9pm. I commented and gestured to my partner. I wasn't as subtle as I thought in this, as the mum looked cross, waved her arm at me and mouthed fuck off.

When my now adult children were that small, they were in bed by 7.30, unless there was an event like a wedding. We got babysitters for evening meals out...very rare as very hard to get babysitters. I would never have dreamt of taking my under 5s to quiet intimate adult spots, then letting them cry for the majority. For 1, I wouldn't have enjoyed my food and 2, neither would those around me.

There's a reason deliveroo exists. Use it. And stop being so frikking selfish. Babies need sleep, not fine dining.

7pm bedtimes are very much a 'wierd British thing' in my experience. It doesn't mean other parents don't have routines or bedtimes. British parents aren't exactly renowned for their great parenting. I meet parents on a daily basis whose DC wake up at 4.30/5am for the day. The whole family are knackered and stressed. The kids often struggle to stay awake to the end of the school day. Bedtime routine is often a lengthy battle, the kids aren't ready to sleep, the parents are at the end of their tether so impatient with their DC, every night, for years. That's not optimum parenting.

Why do you think my parenting is lax?

my deduction on OP was based on comments she made which clearly demonstrated her attitude. No assumptions at all.

You didn't open with the £150 a head price tag becasue you were concerned about kids' bedtimes, so at least be honest about your motivations.

What did the staff say when you raised it with them? For the money you say you spent, I'd be expecting a very attentive waiting staff.

I used to aim for a bedtime of around 7.30, when the dses were small - it worked for us - dh and I got a fairly peaceful evening, and the boys didn’t wake up too early. But it wasn’t set in stone, so we could be flexible if we were out later, and I felt that that flexibility was important to us - if bedtime was late, for some reason, we didn’t have over-tired, crabby children.

@Plsdiscuss

I agree 👍 wish svreaming and screeching children and babies 👶 could be banned from resturants like that

L.o.l 😅

I definitely wouldn't like to have to put up with that at a seriously expensive restaurant

I think 🤔 Maccdnalds is much more of a better option or wetherspoons for families and screaming hyper active children toddlers babies
.

It's always funny to spot a retort that someone's been on the receiving end of, not fully understood, but they vowed they'd use against someone else in future when they thought the timing was right.

Better luck next time.

Their responsibilities should be towards their children . Children should and need to go out so that they learn the norms of a restaurant . Honestly the British people couldn’t be more unfriendly to children if they tried

Not at the expense of other's right to a quiet meal. This doesn't have to mean child free. Master those norms in a Burger King or Brewer's Fayre or somewhere like that before progressing to fancier restaurants at 8pm where it's likely to be a mainly adult clientele.

Like my deductions were based on your comments? 🫣

Lesson learnt . Look for no children restaurants in the future. I am the same as you OP .

Are you ok? You sound a bit "unhinged"

Is it funny that you struggle to use google?

Try searching ‘adult only’ instead of ‘child free’

I live in the arse end of nowhere and I found 2 within half an hour of me in about 30 seconds of looking.

I was questioning your understanding of rhetorical, but whatever,

Hmmmm thought as much

I agree with you tbh. I don’t get involved in what other people do, but personally I don’t take mine to fine dining places late at night. It is frustrating when you’ve paid loads of money for a child free evening and someone else’s baby/kid is screaming the place down 😑

Best in future to double check what time kids are allowed there until and either book after or elsewhere. I always try for an 8.30/9pm dinner sitting and we usually do drinks in the/a bar beforehand. Seems to work.

I can’t imagine taking my baby to a posh restaurant at that time. Or even McDonalds at that time! She’s in bed by 8pm otherwise grumpy and crying. Why would we subject other people to that!? People saying “children have just as much right to be there” well actually, no they don’t. Some places at certain times are not for small children.

There isn’t a ‘right’ to a quiet meal- you pick your restaurant and take your chances.

Click on the image. I DID search "child free".

Try it yourself if you don't believe me.

😂

The gift that keeps on giving.

You really are aren't you?

I personally wouldn't take my child to a fancy restaurant - not because they wouldn't enjoy it but because I wouldn't! We do go to lots of midrange places though (definitely not supporting Wetherspoons or going to places with terrible food just because I have kids) for nice outings and sometimes they work out better, sometimes worse. If it looks like my dc are particularly crabby (cause kids have bad days too), we get the food to go.

Agree though that the 7pm bedtime for all brigade are a bit out of touch. Families are all different. It's like saying you need to have your lunch by noon or you've failed as an adult.

However, if it's got highchairs readily available I doubt its a fancy place.

😂

For the slow slot in the back. I didn't literally mean she had toddlers out at 9. Hence a rhetorical statement.

Is your baby screaming and disturbing others?

Or is it sitting/lying there perfectly placid/chatting or asleep?

If the former, you're in the wrong and I would expect you to be asked to leave if you don't try to do something

If the latter then there isn't a problem.

And the same goes for a table full of drunk or disruptive adults

I don't see why everyone can't behave in a civilised manner when out for a meal

And that wouldn't be £150 per head then would it? Because that would be £300 for both starters, mains and wine.

I eat out a lot, in a wide range of places, and £150 a head definitely isn't your average price.