To labour in my nightdress

[Coolsummer25]

I’m due a baby girl late July. I’m a very private person so would like to labour in a nightdress and with my knickers on. Dh thinks I’m being ridiculous and says he’s never heard of woman doing labour this way and that I will be too hot etc.

In the nicest possible way @Coolsummer25 your husband sounds a bit deranged. There is no way the medical team will put in an unnecessary catheter on the off chance you give birth in the toilet. And quite rightly because having a catheter in comes with a possible risk of infection and should only be used if necessary.

I planned to wear one of dh's old t shirts every time, although with dc2 and dc5 I ended up wearing my favourite nightie by mistake because they both came in a bit of a rush after ages of not much happening. I wore my pants for my youngest 2 because I was gushing waters and I wanted to wear a pad. The midwives took them off in theatre both times which was a bit weird because I was numb from the waist down by then so had no idea they'd done it.

How is your husband such an expert on what women do or do not wear when giving birth? Wear whatever you feel comfortable in - it's your labour. I wore a really cute nightshirt when I gave birth to my son, and later had it made into a teddy for him along with his first sleeper!

I have ridiculous labours (last one was about 10 mins of actual labour) - I still managed to get my jeans off in the time between waters going and child arriving.

I wore a hospital gown both times, why dirty your own clothes. But I don't think you can wear knickers once in established labour, you won't care

Is he your only birthing partner? I mean this in the kindest possible way, but is there any way someone else can come and support you both? If he is so anxious and having to deal with his feelings alone in the moment he could project his thoughts onto you and it won't create a calming environment. In fact it could stress you out more.

Dd1 I laboured in a nighty. It was an old, large one with a Forever friends teddy on the front. I wonder what happened to it.

I have absolutely no idea for #2 or #3.
I do remember with #2 I gave birth on the floor and resisted all suggestions of moving into the bed. The reason was they pumped the bed up to a height I could easily lean on it, and when it came to the point they suggested I might need to lie down and push, I decided it was too high to climb on, completely forgetting that they could lower it again. 🤣
Ds I suspect it was whatever I was wearing at the time because, although he wasn't a quick labour, the other two were slow too and I didn't want to go into hospital too soon and left it a little late. I was in the hospital less than 4 hours total with him because they had no spare beds so we went home again after he was born. We left the house at some point after midnight, having been in labour on and off all day, he was born at 1:30am and we were home again by 4am. He had to sleep in a doll's cot that night because we had nothing ready as he was a little early.

I wore my night dress. No pants though

OP, these are some really quite detailed discussions you and your husband are having and it sounds as though at least one of you (him?) is getting a bit wound up.

Can you give him some jobs to do so he stops worrying about how you'll get your knickers off when the time comes and wanting you catheterised (not the nicest experience IME)? Tell him he is in charge of parking, snacks, music, mood lighting, photos, drinks. Keep him busy.

Also, I was fully dressed (jeans, pants etc) with my last labour until I arrived at hospital already pushing whereupon I stripped off completely and on being told I needed an emergency caesarean lumbered down the corridor totally starkers to the operating theatre. I am still sorry, several years on, for the poor women who saw me pass their rooms. All I can say is I was in the grip of some astonishing hormones and felt high as a kite. I am usually very covered up and even sleep with socks on or I feel insecure.

I arrived in a silk shirt. They got a drip in pretty quickly as I had complications. The shirt was cut off later. The hospital bag was still in the boot of the car.

I actually got given a catheter to give birth because I couldn’t wee in front of 2 midwives watching me and they decided I had issues with urinating (it was just stage fright). It was the worst part of the whole experience, so stingy and awful, really wouldn’t recommend it OP. Your husband sounds like he needs help and also gets no say.

May i suggest taking him to your next midwife appointment and getting her to explain to him. It's about comfort for you. No catheter needed etc

I wore the same nightdress ( from Pippa Dee) during labour and delivery with all 3 of mine. What the hell does your husband think you should wear, or does he want you naked? Tell him you are the one in Labour and will do and wear whatever the you want.

To be honest I gave birth many years ago now and what I was wearing for the event didn't really come up .Just as well really as both mine came fast and it never really came up .I'm sure the midwives managed to strip me fast enough .. They and my husband took care of me .

I wore a nightie in all 3 of my labours. No knickers though… you aren’t flashing your bits at everyone just because you’ve not got knickers on… I kept a sheet over me

I was in a hoodie and joggers until 10 minutes before my water broke with DD2. I only took them off because I was getting too warm. I was then in a tshirt and knickers, waters went and they ended up cutting off my knickers as I went into a bit of shock and couldn't move.

Labour in what you feel comfortable in. I would highly recommend some of those tena knickers that can be ripped off, just incase. Midwives dont care if you are wrapped up or completely naked. It's your comfort they care about and making sure you get baby out safely.

Women welcome to keep their knickers on, examinations are entirely voluntary and knickers only need to be removed for the actual examination (usually once every 4 hours) during an examination any decent midwife will keep you covered with a sheet any way. If you have an epidural may as well leave knickers off as you’ll be less mobile so more of a hassle taking them on and off (but can still remain covered) The midwife usually needs to check the colour of the waters every 30 minutes but usually the waters don’t break until advanced labour in most cases. Many women keep knickers with a pad on until pushing baby out, particularly if they are mobilising as they don’t want to get anything over the floor and easier to see what’s colour vaginal loss is on a pad than just dark coloured knickers

You can wear what you like. Go in a suit and tie if that's what you wish. Just because you're giving birth doesn't mean you lose all autonomy.
If you want to wear pants then wear pants!

A lot of posts on this thread about how midwives will 'need' to examine you. They don't need to. Occasionally there is good reason for an examination, but it really doesn't have to be routine. It's totally up to you.

Wear whatever you want.
Don't randomly get cathetised because your partner is paranoid.

Sounds like you and your partner could really benefit from doing a hypnobirthing course.

You also don't need to examined if you don't want too.

I wore a nightie for every labour. Knickers on initially, off when it was business time.

A

I also wear a nightdress because I felt more comfortable. However, they will make you remove your underwear and once the pain hits, you won't think about anything other than getting the baby out. I am planning to do the same this time around as well

Wear what you like as long as they can get access for monitors, aids, TENS machine etc . I took a couple of my own nightdresses but soaked through both within an hour when my waters broke so ended up in a hospital gown with a sports bra underneath. I didn’t care at that point and I was able to change into some clean dry pyjamas when I moved to postnatal ward. You may want a nightdress with back access if you want to use a Tens machine or get an epidural.

I was planning to do the same, but then went in the birth pool. Just kept my bra on in there. Had to get out as contractions slowed. They gave me a sheet which stayed over me for the remainder of the labour, only lifted it to examine me. They were very considerate about my modesty, I didn't have to ask.