If one of your adult kids won the lottery

[Hedgeoffressian]

If you have two grown children. One of them wins a substantial sum on the lottery. Your other child is very poor living from one pay day to the next and has to budget to make sure they can pay for life’s essentials. Would this affect what you leave your children in your will and would you leave the majority of your assets to the child who needs it most? Or would you split it between them evenly?

I personally would leave the majority to the child who has nothing. Would you do the same?

Disclaimer to add this hasn’t affected me in real life. It’s something I have wondered about though.

It doesn’t make a difference. Inheritance is something extra gifted to dc. It’s not a reward or punishment for your position in life (whatever the reasons). I would never want to hurt either of my dc by leaving them an unequal share.

@SchoolQuestionnaire but indirectly you are hurting one more than the other because you're overlooking that one may have an actual need for the money more than the other.

I would always leave my estate equally to my children as they are equal in my eyes. Unless the child with more money suggested they don’t need my estate. That said, you never know what may happen to them between making will and will being actioned and I would hate for me to pass and the situations have changed.

I might sound out the lottery winner and get a sense of how they feel about things. I tend toward even distribution - but if the lottery winner said they didnt want any, that might change things. Also, maybe lottery winner would give some of their winnings to the sibling, if they're close?

I don’t agree. My dc are very aware that they will inherit equally. They both have the same opportunities in life. Whether or not one is more or less successful for any reason has no baring on their inheritance. This is money that dh and I have earned or also been left. It is extra money that we choose to give to them and one child doesn’t have any more right to it than the other based on their circumstances.

Dfil was very upset when his eldest dd made it clear that she assumed she would inherit their home as ‘I don’t have a house but X & Y (siblings) do’. X & Y have made much more sensible choices and as a result of her decisions dsil has received far more help in life than her siblings. He was so very concerned that if she was expecting this she wouldn’t strive to acquire her own property and would fritter away even more money with nothing left for the next generation. As a consequence of this expectation he has removed all the dc from the will and left everything to the dgc. Dsil’s family will now benefit more than siblings families as there are more of them but she won’t see any money directly. X & Y have both been informed and think it’s a great idea as anything they received would have gone to the kids anyway. And dfil is happier as he feels he is being fair with all sides of the family without the expectation of bailing one particular member out at the expense of all the others.

My opinion would be different if one child (or one of their dc) had a disability or life-limiting illness that required expensive long-term care but this isn’t the case in my family. And to be honest my ideal scenario would be that the kids get as much as possible while we are still here to see them enjoy it so it’s unlikely that one would be in dire straits in any event.

It depends how much they've won. If it's something like 50 million or whatever, half my estate is going to be a drop in a bucket for them. They'll probably use it to tip the valet at the funeral home. But for the poor child, it's a life-changing sum.

It would depend on the sums involved, but I'd leave more to the child who needed it, and would discuss it with both beforehand. Of course, you don't know what will happen when you're gone (maybe they'll marry someone even richer than your rich child!).
If I had only one child who won an amount where they were truly set up for life, I'd probably leave the majority of my estate to a good cause instead - not sure where the cut off point would be though but again i would speak to them about it

Gotta be in it to win it

I would discuss it with my children individually. Hopefully, they love each other enough so that the one without need would want the other to gain more from the inheritance.

Its not really. Your brother is a dick. Sorry.

This is why although I have a little bit in premium bonds, I never considered it for the children. It would cause me too much stress and be unlikely to ever happen!

My husband has 5 parents (including 2 steparents and his former Stepdad he lived with growing up) and 6 siblings. I have 2 parents and 1 brother. Using those rules I would get one sixteenth of my own lottery win! It would have to be a massive win for me to share it equally with everyone.
One of the family has kids with severe disabilities so I'd have to disclose my new found wealth as they wouldn't accept lots of money off me given that they know what I do and that it isn't lucrative. I would be more concerned about looking after that part of the family but would have to take advice from the people concerned if giving the money was the best thing to do or put it in trust for the children (requires forward planning for when their parents die tbh) I wouldn't be able to provide meaningful support for the ones with disabilities if I was also giving shares to everyone else.

It is one thing to be 20 with one sibling to prioritise them, something else to be decades into a marriage with numerous ties, some closer than your family of origin.

Totally agree with this. If I was in a substantially different financial situation to my brother I would expect (and ask) that my parents take that into account in our wills. I want him to have as easy a life as possible!

My BIL is a multimillionaire (self made, not lottery). When my MIL died her estate was split entirely equally between her three children- even though it was like back pocket change to my bil. It was exactly the right thing to do.

It wouldn't change the way I have written my will. Actually the adult child who could use it the most will Actually be getting the least as he's horrid with finances. So the majority of what he may have received will be going to his daughter.

I would hope my one with more/excessive funds would suggest I leave most to the other sibling.

One of my mother’s friends did this. Not a lottery win but one of her children was considerably richer than the other. She left the bulk of her estate to the less rich one. Devastated the richer one and totally ruined the relationship between the siblings.

It is one thing to be 20 with one sibling to prioritise them, something else to be decades into a marriage with numerous ties, some closer than your family of origin

Yep- I was going to say this too. It's one thing to share a lottery win with 1 single sibling. What about if you have 5 siblings, nieces, nephews, your own kids, step kids, aunts, uncles etc and none of them are wealthy in their own right. Many people are from large blended families.

2 million for example divided by 16 is £125,000- that wouldnt even buy you a one bedroom studio flat where I live! I love how people are so generous with other people's money LOL

Winning the lottery is not ‘ shrewd financial decision.’

I would leave it to the one who needed it most and explained why

If I won a substantial amount I would tell my parents to leave everything to my sibling.

Is winning the lottery a shrewd financial decision? I’d be very disappointed with my kid if they didn’t share their good fortune with their siblings. Very, very disappointed.

No, leave the same.

My half siblings will inherit lottery-type money. I will not. My mother will leave us all the same out of her (very small) asset base, as anything else would be taken by the others as a preference for me, and have an emotional impact on them that massively outweighs the financial benefit to me.

Equal share

I would do the same, honestly if anyone wins the lottery then takes offence that their parent gives more to the less well off sibling that's just being selfish.