People who work have anxiety too

[Fedupandgrump]

Anyone else on the verge of a breakdown with work, kids, mortgage and cost of living?

I’ve read a lot of threads recently about people with mental health conditions worried about being forced into employment when they feel as though they would not be able to cope. Whilst I sympathise, it’s come at a time where I am completely overwhelmed, burnt out and wonder how the fuck I’m going to get through the week. I treat myself to a half hour sob in Sainsburys car park every couple of days and I wake up every morning with dread, fear and anxiety about what the day will hold. However, I go and work because I. Have. No. Choice. I have two kids and a mad dog that relies on me and my husband to keep our shit together and a roof over our heads. Every day I can feel my heart racing and I feel permanently like I’m in fight or flight mode and I wonder if this is going to lead to a premature heart attack in my 30’s.

I sometimes feel like people who don’t work due to poor mental health thinks those of us who do work, are suffering less than them. I know IAMBU but I can’t help the way I feel at the minute.

More ableism from you.

I worked in primary care in a very deprived area and saw lots of people claiming benefits for mental health, I'd say 30% of them genuinely probably would never be able to work.

However, I did notice that if you are in social housing, there is less worry about not working as housing benefit covers your rent. That's probably why the rest of us try and carry on, else we'd be homeless.

I get you OP. Although I am now much better, there was a time a couple of years ago when my anxiety and depression was severe but I kept going to work. I kept working because I had just become a single mum and my kids needed me to house and feed them. There was no choice. Benefits would have taken too long to come in and we'd of been up shit creek. The anxiety of not being able to feed my kids kept me going to work. And before anyone bleats at me about how it 'couldnt of been that bad', before work once I literally sat by the lake with rocks in my coat pocket. I kept thinking I can just end it all, the pain would be gone. Then I thought about my kids and what would happen to them and I went to work and did a 12 hour shift.

Equally then, if you have an op or an injury then you would be made to get up and about asap. Do your physio exercises. Taking steps to fully healed.

It's painful and uncomfortable but needs to be done. No different to the mind as you say.

Some mental health issues will never be cured but managed. So life will be painful and uncomfortable and need effort. Some mild illness will be the same and do not necessarily render one unable to work. If you're going to feel shit, ie a bit depressed you are going to feel shit whether working or not.

Not working isn't a remedy but seems to be the narrative. I have x condition can't work. People limiting themselves, writing them selves off.

Before anyone gets defensive I say this as someone who has been very mentally unwell at times and in psyche units. I have always worked (apart from when ill. Was it easy not at times. Was it worth it yesterday as the life I have now id completely different.

@AceofPentacles very true about social housing they are far less bothered about not working as they will get their rent covered....agree rest of us carry on or we would be homeless if we can't pay the mortgage!

Covid and COL has knocked the stuffing out of a lot of people...which hasn't helped!

None would meet the criteria for PIP

Which proves that PIP is very hard to get.

I hear you 💐

I think there are different levels of anxiety. Having witnessed people in freeze I don’t think it’s a case of soldiering on for them unfortunately. As they literally cannot leave the house to go to the shops etc. I don’t know how the government draw the line. But I would hope those receiving benefits are those at the high end of the mental health remit.

Yes agree, the biggest factor in people soldiering on at even greater risk to their health is the fear of losing their homes that they have worked so hard for and it can happen in a matter of a few months if you don't have a supportive lender. It must be the most worrying thing ever.

Over half the applications are awarded, some for writer’s cramp (I shit you not!)

Well said, completely agree!

Whilst I agree somewhat and sympathise, I also don’t believe you really know how bad anxiety can be for some people. They’d be no way in hell I’d even be able to get in to position where I was crying in my car in a Sainsbury’s car park about work because my anxiety stops me leaving the house/passing my driving test (complete nervous breakdown)/passing interviews because I shake and cry. I wish I was there!

How many times! PIP is an in work benefit. It is supposed to meet the extra costs of being disabled regardless of your employment status.

The income replacement benefits are ESA and UC.

YANBU at all. Perfectly spot on in my opinion

I remember having to get ready for work hours early. I would have a shower then end up sitting on my bed naked and sweating having to clean up again before being able to leave the house. It got quite bad and I developed OCD and panic attacks. Still had to work, single person, no-one to rely on so I really didn’t have a choice. It did get better though but I think it would have taken me longer if I hadn’t been working.

I actually don’t know how a PIP would have helped me tbh, counselling yes (I had the drugs already) but a bit of extra cash would have made zero difference to my mental state.

@GoodnightAdeline "Over half the applications are awarded, some for writer’s cramp (I shit you not!)" Re writers cramp (never heard of this by the way) - PIP is about how you manage your activities of daily living, so if the cramp was so severe that you couldn't lift pots and pans in the kitchen, or open jars and cans, handle a bottle of shampoo or soap in the shower or manage buttons and zips to dress then you would probably score enough points to get standard daily living. Not saying this is right, or wrong., but that's PIP.

I knew a girl with agoraphobia and panic attacks. She hated her life and desperately wanted a job. In her case, the mental illness was genuine, and she deserved every penny of her benefits. She absolutely could not work. I have known others with anxiety and depression, however, who could but didn't. I'm not saying their anxiety and depression was a lie, but it was no worse than mine and many others.

Anxiety and stress are killing people. Modern society is quite literally wrecking our nervous systems. It's burning us out. We didn't evolve to live like this. We're not wired up for traffic jams and flashing screens and eight hour days in a desk or a shop. If there weren't so many goddam people that would be something. I'm in rural Essex and you can hardly move. My local woods have been hacked down to make way for yet another housing estate, and at night I'm woken by the screeching of souped up car engines (and btw, how the fuck is it legal to drive around with a giant exhaust pipe making sounds like a fucking canon? As if the modern world isn't noisy and stressful enough). There are too many people, too many houses, too many cars and too much noise. It's making us all ill.

Have you ever known anyone, ever, to have writer’s cramp so badly they can’t use their hand?

I mean this kindly, but no one gets to choose what sort of breakdown they have.

You could end up being sectioned. You have no choice with anything at all then.

Please look after yourself now, before it is too late.

Plenty of jobs don't require much interaction with people,or even mental capacity (factory work, stuffing envelopes etc)

Factories have been automated and need less people

Stuffing envelopes in this day and age? Like that's even a massive thing any more

the reality is that tedious but not particularly tasking jobs have been reduced, leaving jobs that are much harder to do if you are unwell

Which means many many jobs require interactions with people e.g. call centre work rather than factory work

Maybe we need reminding that PIP isn't some benefit that's specific to mental health. And by focusing on one condition and ignoring others, well that's discrimination, and an appeal on these grounds won't stand up in court

I think there's a huge number of people who work despite MH issues / burnout depression / anxiety etc.

True but only if they have a supportive and understanding employer.

Someone I used to work with ended up so unwell with anxiety and mental health struggles, they were forced out of the job. Sacked on incapacity grounds.

Everyone's situation is different and various things make all the difference on whether someone is able to stay in or find work. An understanding employer, supportive family or friends, easily accessible and effective mental health services.

I don't know what writers cramp is and without outing myself, have not heard of this in all my years in my field of work. So I don't know where you're getting this information from. @GoodnightAdeline

Other generations dealt with world wars, the workhouse, going down the mines 12 hours a day, debilitating sickness…. All without a therapist in sight.

I’m all for awareness of mental health, but let’s keep this in perspective. This is not the biggest mental health crisis the UK has ever seen. It’s just the one most obviously subsidised from the public purse.

https://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/personal-independence-payment-pip/success-rates