To think I'm not autistic?

[meadowhouse]

AIBU to think that if I was autistic it would've been noticed during the many years I was in therapy as a teen?

I think I'm autistic but doubting myself because how could so many professionals miss it?

They're not looking for it

If you're a woman it's massively under diagnosed

Thank you. I am

How old are you? Until fairly recently, autism in those without learning disabilities wasn’t really recognised.

I had extensive therapy and mental health input in my young adult years and nobody suggested autism. I was diagnosed at 38, then with ADHD at 41.

A friend of mine saw many doctors and therapists from aged 16 - 30 before being diagnosed with autism and adhd at 33, about 10 years ago.

I’ve heard lots of women with similar stories.

I have known women that have been under MH services for years, and it was never picked up. It is a common thing with women diagnosed with EUPD.
I am one of them, and looking into being reassessed.

A therapist isn’t likely to be qualified to diagnose autism. They wouldn’t be looking for it.

A friend of mine didn't get diagnosed until her late 50's and she'd had lots of therapy in her life.
Also though some traits seen as autistic can be down to trauma. Lack of eye contact, sensitive to noises etc.

A therapist would most likely not be looking for ASD, nor would necessarily know what to look for.

Speak to your GP and they can do a screening.

That’s very interesting. I have been diagnosed with EUPD and bipolar disorder. In the last couple of years a few people (not professionals) have asked me if I have been assessed for autism.

It is a very common misdiagnosis. When you look at the diagnostic criteria for EUPD, it basically describes an autistic woman

The diagnosis criteria changed as the DSM books updated, people have to be up to date with current research, people need to fight their own unconscious bias, people need to have access to the information even though the internet has been around along time there never used to be as much sharing of information, people need to know what they are looking for many autistic traits can be caused by something else especially if trauma is in the mix, autism was a 'white boy' disorder until fairly recently with it often showing in a much more subtle way in girls.

Teen DD is diagnosed autistic. My DBro in his 30s ticks the same if not more boxes than she does, had years as a school refuser, therapy, various input from other professionals and diagnosed with other MH conditions, they didn't even think to look at autism because he was a bright, high achieving child, no real external behavioural issues but suffered massively socially.

I was in the hospital off and on for year for anorexia in my teens and early twenties. I was as part of that diagnosed with extreme OCD.

Just last year I was diagnosed with ADHD. It answered so many questions and medication has changed my life.

Autism and ADHD were not recognized as much in girls previously. We mask differently and our symptoms are different.

^^ all of this. Do try to get a diagnosis. Get the process started asap. It can take years if you can't fund privately.

i was diagnosed with secondary inattentive adhd at 42(april 2023)
the secondary part is rare

i never once suspected
i was diagnosed privately by a psychologist as i was going through therapy for a emotional breakdown(not nervous breakdown)

i ticked 30 out of 30 on their check list

my son is 13 and has ADHD hyperactive(and many other disabilities) and was diagnosed at 3

ive also taken many classes and courses online but i missed me
i put down the traits to being a alpha personality(been this type since birth)

i cant get medication though as i went through the private route and nhs wont even put me on the list as they stopped this funding in my part(rural south Wales)

I did an MSc Psychology conversion five years ago, did the Ed psych path, my main field of study was autism and I didn’t recognise myself in it at all. I am now diagnosed, but all the materials I was studying were based on male presentation. It was only when my youngest started showing signs and I also was working in a lot of autism settings that I realised and started reading about women with autism. My sister has EUPD diagnosis and I strongly suspect that it’s actually autism too. Being diagnosed has been life changing for me, I now understand myself and what I need, and my OCD which was based on a general feeling that I am broken has all but vanished because I realised I’m not broken.

edited to add I was 35 at diagnosis and had up to that point spent most of my adult life in therapy without any therapist even suggesting it

Thanks all. Asked to be referred for assessment. Is it worth getting tested for ADHD at the same time?

I was diagnosed with depression at 13. Medicated until mid 30’s, they never really worked so stopped taking them. Then spent the next 10 years or so being the same but taking meds on and off. 3 years ago I had a revelation (a daughter with audhd)
i can safely say I am not depressed, I just now understand myself for what it was that was affecting me.
All the signs were there, I saw multiple psychiatrists, drs, counsellors, not one of them spotted it and all the signs we now recognise as female presentation of asd were there shouting away!

At the risk of sounding goady, why? It isn’t a loaded question - genuinely wondering what the advantages of a diagnosis would be.

Don’t get your hopes up about things changing if diagnosed there’s no help out there it’s just a label for adults. If you think adhd might be worth going down that route as you can be medicated and can be life changing

🙄

@Thecatisannoying the advantage of having a diagnosis would be finally knowing why I am the way I am after all these years. My whole life would make sense. I'd feel validated and understood

@TortillaChipAddict can you recommend any books?

What makes you think everyone is autistic these days, @EmilyTjP?

Here comes the ignorance...
OP diagnosis isn't a label, it's a reason your brain works the way it does.
It allows you to stop second guessing and be kinder to yourself, find strategies, stop masking (if you want) and generally understand yourself better.
Diagnosed post 40 here. It's been a year of therapy and I'm happier and more comfortable in my own skin than I've EVER been.