Divorce Settlement

[DinosaurCity]

I am seeking legal advice but I was wondering if anyone could offer some knowledge if you’ve been through a similar situation.

My wife and I separated last year. She was the bread winner and could work from home as she is S.E so we decided I would take paternity leave and spent 11 months at home with our daughter. Only earning SSPL.

So I earn approx £20/ph working 34 hours per week and she can earn a minimum of £60 all the way up to £200/ph working 4 days.

She wants us to take a 50/50 split in the divorce application. But I believe this would be an unfair split.

We are going to co-parent our daughter 50% of the time each.

Does anyone know if she will be expected to contribute in anyway give what she earns in comparison to me, or have a general idea if going for more in the divorce is realistic and if so, what did people if you had a similar situation were you awarded/ and or agree with your spouse.

Thank you in advance for your help and advice.

No, I don’t think so if you are sharing care 50/50. She won’t be expected to pay more to you, though I suspect she will likely cover more of the day to day expenses eg uniform? What about assets etc?

Thank you for your reply. When you say you don't think so, is that because you've been through similar or because you know the expectations of a divorce when one earns more than the other.

Why do you think it's an unfair split? What are you proposing? What do you think is best for your child?

There are a number of factors that tend to get looked at when splitting the assets of a marriage.

Length of marriage, housing the child(ten) with both parents etc etc.

Earning power of each parent isn't generally a major factor unless one parent is severely disabled and cannot work.

As you are separated and you say she is in the marital home, where are you living?

Would you want to be bought out or would you want to try to keep the marital home for you?

I think what you are asking about is "spousal support" which is where your ex would pay you a monthly sum so you can continue to live the lifestyle you became accustomed to when you were married. I think these payments are very rare now but you could check with your solicitor.

As you are both having your child 50/50 neither of you are due to pay the other any child maintenance.

Thank you for your reply. I think it's unfair because after all my outgoings I'm left with very little disposable income meaning I won't be able to provide the same level of lifestyle for my daughter. I can make changes needed but it will be financially difficult. I'm not asking for loads more, just enough so I can provide for my daughter without worrying each month. I'm willing to make any sacrifices needed but equally I want to be able to live worry free to some degree.

You won’t get a payment.

You may get half the equity of the property.

But your earning power is no longer your wife’s responsibility.

I know neither of us would have to pay child support as it's a 50/50.

I know about spousal payment and again I don't think I'd be entitled to that. I am curious if anyone has been in similar situation and what the outcome might have been?

The martial home is being sold. Both currently living in the home as I have no family to stay with.

Married 10 years. Have two cars. Some savings in an account. Nothing else.

Can you upskill / change jobs to earn more? Will you get ££ from the house?

It's not up to your ex to pay spousal support to maintain your lifestyle or to match the lifestyle your child will have at your house with their house.

You living your life "worry free to some degree" isn't the responsibility of your ex. You'll need to figure it out yourself.

Is this from your experience of a divorce please? There are expectations around these things so that's why I'm asking from anyone that has been through similar.

@DinosaurCity

Use Section 25 Factors to work out the split as this is what the court use. https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1973/18/section/25

First there full financial disclosure.
Look at Form E. Both parties complete one, attach documents and exchange. This includes income and assets e.g. savings, stocks and shares, pensions, and property etc. It is a legal requirement to exchange full and frank disclosure.
The assets are valued e.g. property by surveyor or estate agents, for pensions the providers send a cash equivalent transfer value on request, and parties can use an actuary to do a pension on divorce report showing what a 50/50 or other percentage split would be in capital and income.
Once all assets are disclosed and valued, negotiations can happen. Section 25 Factors are used to decide the split. A mediator can be used if appropriate (not if domestic abuse is a factor for example).

More info here:
https://www.advicenow.org.uk/divorce-and-separation

Thank you for your advice.

I understand about not getting a payment. As for the equity. I'm unsure why you say I may get 50%. Is there a reason you think I wouldn't?

How long were you out of the workforce, and were there any other significant sacrifices you made for your ex's career ... these are factors in how the equity and other assets are split. Does she have a pension, do you?

Spousal is highly unlikely unless it's a very high income and/or you made significant sacrifices with your career to support hers eg I was a trailing spouse while he went job to job, including in places i wasn't allowed to work due to visa restrictions.

It doesn't sound like you sacrificed a career to be the sahp? Correct me if I'm wrong. That would make a difference. But if you haven't, then your ex earns her salary because she's worked for that, and you earn your salary that you work for. Why would she have to share it with an ex?

Another way of looking at it op, is if you have together accrued assets over ten years, whilst she's been putting in up to 10x what you have been putting in, then you are very very lucky to be getting 50%. You'd be no where near that if you hadn't been with her.

@DinosaurCity

Not mine personally but a close family members, yes.

Starting point was 50/50 asset split. They ended up with more due to ex earning much more (and having spent some time limiting their earnings to pick things up around the home). Think it was more like 65/35 split of equity / pensions / savings etc.

Post divorce / financials being agreed there is no ongoing support - this is (from my understanding) totally normal. The split of assets is the end point of being financially linked if doing 50/50 childcare, which they do, so no child maintenance.

Thank you, that secretion 25 form is really helpful. I think some people are commenting without fully understanding the process. Someone has said that they won't take into account potential income, which this states it does.

So if you accept there won’t be spousal support you are questioning if you could receive a larger portion of the existing assets because your earning power is lower?

you would have to prove that your extended paternity leave impacted your earning power that is still ongoing which assuming your daughter in school age now I don’t think is likely.
You may also need to prove that your ex wife wanted you to take extended leave that was detrimental to your ongoing earning potential.

My sister in law tried this and her husband countered that he had always been willing to pay childcare so she could return to work and being a SAHM was her idea and she didn’t not come out of it well.

Section 25 Matrimonial Causes Act

(a)the income, earning capacity, property and other financial resources which each of the parties to the marriage has or is likely to have in the foreseeable future, including in the case of earning capacity any increase in that capacity which it would in the opinion of the court be reasonable to expect a party to the marriage to take steps to acquire;

Hi, I'm not asking for ongoing payment. I know I'm not entitled to that of child maintenance . This situation sounds similar to mine and there appears to be a higher split in favour of the lower earner. I'm not asking for more to leave us both in a difficult situation. I want us both to be able to provide for our daughter. But my ex partner does have the much better earning capacity than I do.

I divorced recently.

I was a teacher and earned approx 30k a year.

My ExH earned about 300k a year,

We had a 50:50 split of assets.

Yes I think the court will consider that it’s up to you to increase your earning power to obtain the lifestyle you want unless you can show that this is not possible for some reason.

Not the same for us. My wife didn't want to take the leave as she is s.e and it would have impacted her business too much to take a leave off work for that length of time.

I stayed at home for 11 months as she didn't want our child in nursery before this age. So she can't argue that she offered or that we would jointly pay for nursery fees so I could return to work.

Thank you. Again really helpful.

This is exactly the lack of understanding people are showing by implying that it's not my wife's responsibility, I'm really not trying to do this unfairly. I just want an outcome that reflects what our situation is. She earns much more than I do. I will have to live off the equity from the house sale and which will not last forever.