Divorce Settlement

[DinosaurCity]

I am seeking legal advice but I was wondering if anyone could offer some knowledge if you’ve been through a similar situation.

My wife and I separated last year. She was the bread winner and could work from home as she is S.E so we decided I would take paternity leave and spent 11 months at home with our daughter. Only earning SSPL.

So I earn approx £20/ph working 34 hours per week and she can earn a minimum of £60 all the way up to £200/ph working 4 days.

She wants us to take a 50/50 split in the divorce application. But I believe this would be an unfair split.

We are going to co-parent our daughter 50% of the time each.

Does anyone know if she will be expected to contribute in anyway give what she earns in comparison to me, or have a general idea if going for more in the divorce is realistic and if so, what did people if you had a similar situation were you awarded/ and or agree with your spouse.

Thank you in advance for your help and advice.

Use Section 25 Factors to work out the split as this is what the court use. https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1973/18/section/25

I initially put the £50k deposit down from the sale of my previous house sale. I've ran the home so she could build her business and supported her over the years with admin/ accounts/ driving her to places for work related purposes etc. I took a years leave so it wouldn't impact her business. I don't think I'm lucky to get 50%. It's the very least to what I'm entitled too to help raise our daughter adequately. But thank you for your input.

I'm not suprised she's separated from you. You seem to think that due to her earning power your entitled to more. Like someone said your assets you've acurred are likely down to her, why should you get extra? Go out and retrain. It's not down your wife to fund your lifestyle anymore your no longer together.

It’s untrue that you won’t get maintenance, even if it’s 50/50 custody, I know 2 people who still pay child maintenance due to a very large wage difference.

You can use the CMA calculator to see what could potentially be awarded.

The main thing in the divorce is to understand;

• how the home asset will be divided up, and what is in the best interests of the children when doing so
• if you are splitting 50/50, how will childcare be paid for if you are both working full time
• How everyday expenses will be paid for, shoes, clothes, uniforms, school trips, after school activities etc
• how do you share the life admin for the children, who is responsible for doctors appointments, dentist, parents evening, rsvp’ing to a class mates party, making sure homework is done, etc etc

the last bullet is probably the most important. 50/50 is a share of the wellbeing of your children. They should not suffer by the choices the adults in their lives make.

Your initial post was confusing and it did sound as if you were asking about spousal maintenance.

Also, you won’t be living off the equity from your house; you’ll be dipping into it, but you’ll be living off your salary of £35k a year.

It isn't true that maintenance is never due when residency is split 50/50. If there is a significant difference in income then the higher paid parent may still owe money to the lower paid parent.

Jesus Christ. Your lawyer was shit. You’ve totally be screwed over.

@DinosaurCity they will take into account how much you can borrow etc in order to have a home and work out based on your earning potential you should defo push for more than half in your circumstances. I’d go for a clean break and rather than getting maintenance for yourself ( that would cease if you cohabited or got married again, gets as much as you can now from the assets.

@DinosaurCity
Section 25 Matrimonial Causes Act

(a)the income, earning capacity, property and other financial resources which each of the parties to the marriage has or is likely to have in the foreseeable future, including in the case of earning capacity any increase in that capacity which it would in the opinion of the court be reasonable to expect a party to the marriage to take steps to acquire;

-That is the earning capacity of both parties.

Look at Section 25 Factors as this is what the court use.

https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1973/18/section/25

I got divorced a couple of years ago, shared custody so no maintenance paid to either parent. You'll be expected to find full time work, you may get a slightly bigger proportion of the estate, but not by much. I assume you are both young enough to have significant earning potential?

I'm sorry to hear that. That doesn't sound correct at all. I know you can't do much now but I think your solicitor really let you down here.

They really aren't. The house we have and the value that's it's increased by is down to me. She didn't even paint one wall in the 8 years we've lived here. She also only just learnt where the mop bucket was and how to bleed a radiator last year. There have been times she wasn't working and I was. She moved into my house and reduced her outgoing by nearly £700. But yet you make the assumption that because I'm asking a genuine question about providing for my daughter that you've not surprised she left. You seem like a really decent human.

This. Go online and run the numbers through the CMS calculator. Your wife may well have to pay you maintenance for your child even if care is shared equally.

The starting point in divorce is an equal division of assets and then you look at the section 25 factors to see whether there should be any deviation from 50/50. However, the paramount consideration must always be the housing needs of the child.

This means each parents mortgage capacity is relevant. By way of example :- if you each need a 2 bed house which in your area is £200,000.

If you have a mortgage borrowing capacity of £80,000 but your wife because of her greater earnings has a mortgage capacity of £120,000 this MAY see you awarded a higher percentage of matrimonial assets (60/40 rather than 50/50) if it meant you both could buy a property.

The court looks at overall fairness of outcome taking into account each of your needs in particular your need to provide a home for your child.

The above is obviously simplistic and you need to speak to a solicitor. If you live in a university town often law schools run free legal clinics that may be of some
help to you.

Thank you. That's really helpful information.

I have been the 'house manager' of our home for 10 years. I've done almost 90% of the jobs to run it including arranging the bills, admin, cleaning. Organising and planning. Whilst working full time and trying to maintain my own health.

I will be the one that continues with the final point. It will be me that keeps our daughter's life organised. I've done it since she was born and support my wife to do it now for the sake of our daughter. The above has been some of the frustrations in our marriage and why it's broken down.

Thank you. I will take a look. It appears some think I'm trying to take what I wouldn't be entitled to because we have separated. I'm not. I just want it to be fair.

You can’t get annoyed at people for assuming you bought your home together when you didn’t mention in your original post that you already owned it. If this is the case, the split may be 50/50, although you should have protected your existing equity prior to getting married or putting your wife’s name on the deeds.

@PotatoPudding I'm not getting annoyed. Nor do I regret not protecting my original assets from my previous house sale. But you assumed something that was incorrect and I was giving more context to my situation for you.

@Youcannotbeseriousreally thank you. I wish we could for for 50/50 but I just can't afford it long term. My outgoing will leave me with very little disposable income and it worries me.

You won’t get more because you’ve done ‘life admin’ for years!

so you took 11 months paternity? That won’t materially impact your earning ability! What did you do before and why can’t you return to it?

no one here knows what the split will be as it will depend on what assets are available but you will be assessed on needs, and your earning ability - so what was that 11 months ago? The fact you took 11 months leave won’t materially impact the overall split

what split are you expecting and why can’t you return full time ?

She didn't even paint one wall in the 8 years we've lived here. She also only just learnt where the mop bucket was and how to bleed a radiator last year

And there it is.

She was too busy earning the megabucks to keep you and your daughter in the lifestyle you have become accustomed to and seem to think you are entitled to live even though you're divorcing.

Get yourself into a position where you can apply for a job that pays more.

If she’s self employed she’ll probably hide her money and screw you (that’s what happened to both my closest friends). One got £120k then 2 years later her ex magically sold one of his businesses for £2.2million. He was pleading poverty previously having taken out loads of loans to “support the business”. It was all a game. She couldn’t afford the solicitor to fight him and didn’t know quite how much his businesses were really worth. Good luck - lawyer up.

I don't think anywhere I've stated that. Also, I've returned to work full time. I'm doing all I can to support my daughter. But your comment doesn't sound like you want to provide useful information for me, if anything it appears you are making judgements based on very little information. Of course I'm not going to put my whole life story here and I've provided some information in hope someone who's experience similar can help. Divorce is an extremely diffract and emotional process. I just asked a question in hope some information can help. Like the post above that's actually said, I might be entitled to a payment from my ex wife.

I live a very simple life. I don't live beyond my means and never have done. But you appeared to have made a judgement based on this comment alone. I was merely adding some context to some else who had also made an incorrect judgement saying I've been lucky. If anything she's lucky we live in the beautiful home we have. One we bought it because of my deposit and my earnings at the time and I've spent years doing it up to increase its value. But none of that matters right?

I earn more than my ex. We split assets 50:50. To be fair I put more into the assets given my higher earnings, so he effectively 'did well' in that sense. It was me who took the mat leave and went down to part time hours.

I think there is more weight if you can evidence an impact on your career as a result of having taken reduced hours or given up work. But usually if the child is quite young this is unlikely.

When my ex husband and I decided to try out 50/50, I continued to receive the same amount of maintenance. The reasons for this were due to me having to work part time around his hours and also as we didn’t want our DD’s lifestyle to change in anyway. On top of this they would contribute towards uniforms ect. This has all changed now but our focus was always putting our DD first.

Honestly, OP, you are coming across as very grabby and quite immature. You don’t earn a shit salary; you just don’t earn as much as your wife and you don’t work what most people would consider full-time hours. You won’t be destitute if it goes 50/50; you just won’t have the same disposable income as you have now.