To have found my first mammogram really upsetting?

[YompingJo]

Got a letter through with very basic details if an appointment. Turned up and found the whole thing demeaning. Tiny room, intimidating machine taking up most of it. The radiologist was monosyllabic and bossy and manhandled me into the right position including grabbing each breast and shoving it into position, pushing other bits of my body out of the way, not once asking first. I know it's a necessary procedure, but a bit of sensitivity would have gone a long way, and having the respect to ask for consent before grabbing a breast is a basic consideration. I'm autistic and needed to know much more what to expect beforehand. The letter gave a way to request assistance in the case of SEN, but I don't consider myself to have SEN and didn't know what I'd need until I was right there, so that wasn't any help. There was a QR code for feedback, which I gave but I just feel... invaded and demeaned. AIBU?

No idea what you are talking about now. And you jumped on my post calling me clueless remember? So I am confused as to why you are confused.

Maybe next time there will be sweets and cookies offered. If you cannot locate information about the conduct of a mammogram and if you were concerned, then I think that falls on you to a certain extent. As for chastising the staff - what you see as abrupt - others like me would see as professionalism. So we are back to that notion that people can have different perceptions - the thing you were so keen to outline remember?

Pithy and punchy? 😊

So even though you know it would make many women more comfortable, you don’t think it’s important enough? And let’s just be clear again, this is in regards to simply treating a patient with respect and asking for consent first. Just literally takes a couple of seconds, but you think it’s too much bother? Sounds very callus to me. Patients are consenting to the medical appointment by turning up, sure, but that doesn’t mean they expect to suddenly be manhandled. Also they are free to leave whenever they want, and it’s what I will do if anyone ever tries to grab me like that.

Do you have any empathy at all for women like me who have been abused? I was sexually abused as a child, it’s something you NEVER get over, and situations like this are very difficult for me. Being treated with kindness makes the whole thing so much easier and less traumatic. I can only be grateful that the amazing medical staff I’ve encountered don’t have your dehumanising attitude.

I am very very sorry for your experience of abuse that is horrific. But nowhere in the initial posting was this mentioned as a relevant factor. Of course for people who have been through a traumatic experience like your's I can see that the procedure could be conducted differently. Like I said my comments were not said in the context of the OP having suffered abuse because this was not mentioned.

Yup! Pithy (concise) Punchy (you were trying to be forceful and effective). So you succeeded in the former but spectacularly failed in the latter (IMO).

Why don’t you think women should be asked before being grabbed by a stranger, why isn’t their comfort important to you? Why do you think it’s too much to expect a medical professional to ask before touching? It takes seconds. You’re insisting it’s not needed, when many women here are telling you it is, yet you decide to ignore them, why?

I think even on a busy day, possibly running behind, it will not add much to a nurse's time to say things like, "I just need to adjust you here," "I'm moving your left breast to a better position," "this is going to be uncomfortable," just basic stuff while doing the job that needs doing - but which would make a big difference to the patient's experience as it happens.

People who have experienced abuse shouldn't have to inform the HCPs of that to be treated kindly. It should just be normal to treat people undergoing ANY medical procedure, especially one that makes you feel vulnerable, kindly. It takes no more time than being terse. I can't possibly see how that could be considered unreasonable.

Well presumably you are aware some women have a history of abuse, so why do I need to disclose it? I shouldn’t have to tell a stranger that in order to be treated with kindness. No woman should. This is why it’s needed.

No but this whole thing came down to whether consent is necessary and my view is that it is not. As to whether the radiographer was rude / abrupt then I think these facets can be very subjective.

Given the sheer number of mammograms performed each day, this would be a huge waste of not only of the radiologist and the patient's time, but the appointment itself.

I have to admit that I find this whole topic odd, particularly the idea of expecting to be asked to consent to be touched by the clinician. I had my first mammogram 30 years ago at the age of 15, and dozens since, both NHS and privately. I don't recall anyone ever asking me for consent.

• radiographer not nurse.

I believe this started about consent in the context of the OP and not in the sense of kindness. I believe that kindness is desirable but maybe in the context of an horrendous work load with lots of patients it is not always prioritised over professionalism and the need to get the right outcomes. If the person themselves is going through something should they be allowed to have a bad day? There is so much to this.

Because you piped up when I said consent could be withdrawn at any time, saying that I was talking bullshit. Then, when challenged, you said: 'Yes, obviously consent can be withdraw during the procedure'... which is exactly what I had said initially.

So it's not me that's confused love!

I think that consent can be ascertained as the procedure goes along if the HCP keeps talking to the patient throughout, just casually along the lines of "I'll just move you over to the left here if that's ok, now the machine is going to do x or y." For an uncomfortable procedure, it just makes sense to err on the side of being friendly.

I did not say that I said you can withdraw from a procedure irrespective of whether consent was given. Keep up.

The ahps are radiographers...not nurses. They should be couteous and kind even when rushed.

Of course they’re allowed a bad day, but just like every other industry, that doesn’t mean you get to take it out on the ‘client’. Being professional means acknowledging that the woman is in front of you half naked and possibly feeling vulnerable and having some empathy for that. It doesn’t mean coldly barking orders and grabbing someone unexpectedly.

Don't be ridiculous - but a hello, or a 'just going to do x' wouldn't go amiss.
As for info, I looked at everything provided. Maybe I was daft to assume that the NHS would provide the correct information.
As for abrupt - I would say she was downright rude. But again perceptions eh?

I was just surprised - I've been accompanying my elderly mum to a variety of hospital appointments recently - including procedures and surgery, and the staff have all been polite, informative and helpful. From cleaners through to consultant without exception.

If I am having a bad day I can hide behind my emails. I literally cannot imagine what it must be like to have to deal with patients when you are stressed, worn out and/or feeling full of anxiety and despair. I think that they should be cut a bit of slack. But there seems to be no latitude for this at all on this site.

I hated having mammograms, the first one was shockingly painful (literature and info talked about 'discomfort.' Having your boobs squashed flat in several directions fucking hurts. )
I get some people might find it less painful than others but I felt absolutely side-swiped by it. The manhandling wasn't too bad. I think i lifted each breast into the plate myself and the technician then put it into the correct position (and positioned me as well, i had drape myself around the machine and hang on to it for dear life.)
But l never had anyone who was other than pleasant and courteous, a cold or brusque technician could have made a huge difference and I completely understand how someone might feel bruised by the whole experience.

Why don’t you think women should be asked before being grabbed by a stranger, why isn’t their comfort important to you? Why do you think it’s too much to expect a medical professional to ask before touching? It takes seconds. You’re insisting it’s not needed, when many women here are telling you it is, yet you decide to ignore them, why?

If I go to see a health care professional because I've got say a lump on my back, then I fully expect them to say "I'm just going to take a look and feel the lump, ok?" If go for the express purpose of a mammogram or smear, they cannot do either without touching me. Impossible to carry out those tests without touching. I willingly went, I don't need to be asked if I want them to carry out the very test I attended for. Absolutely ridiculous.

You literally did:

Incorrect: informed and implied non verbal consent is given by the free will of turning up, the clear information provided in the leaflets that show your breasts will need to be placed on the machine. You are the one who is talking 'bullshit' I am afraid.

That was said in response to me saying consent can be withdrawn at any time.

Keep up indeed. Who made you judge and jury?

Though I see it's not just me you're bashing over the head with your 'opinion', which is largely irrelevant in this instance.

The only opinion that matters is OP's who said she felt uncomfortable with HOW her procedure was handled.

I don't think you get it. And I have never bashed someone over the head in my life, with my opinion or not!