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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Crying and walking out of hairdresser

257 replies

Calmondeck · 26/04/2024 16:57

I don’t usually place much importance on haircuts but today’s was a big one. My first haircut post brain surgery. I was partially shaved for the operation so have rocked a very misshapen head for the past 8 months. Now I have multiple bolts holding my skull together, and I guess the psychological significance of getting to cut off all of this old hair that remains and starting afresh 8 months on felt big. I researched top hairdressers in my city and booked aiming to make it a special afternoon. I explained to them in advance the scaring and bolts issue. I arranged childcare.

After 4 hours, an hour of which was spent waiting for the hairdresser, and an hour waiting with wet hair while they forgot about me at the sinks… i just got quietly teary, realised I had to leave in order to cross the city and make it home to breastfeed my baby before bed…

now walking through the city with wet hair so disappointed. First world problems I know.

was I ABU for leaving?

OP posts:
Sugargliderwombat · 27/04/2024 20:33

And as someone else said, It takes a lot of courage to walk out of somewhere even without your circumstances. Sorry it was so shit.

RavenhairedRachel · 27/04/2024 20:45

How awful and at a time when you must be feeling quite vulnerable. I absolutely hate going to the hairdresser I go maybe 2 or 3 times a year and dread it. I would rather go to the dentist

Noddynoodle · 27/04/2024 20:48

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I work with cancer patients and I know how much of a big deal this must have been for you. If your speech isn’t up to it, or more you want to conserve your energy for more important people, get your husband to call them and say how appalled you are at the lack of service you received/didn’t receive. I hope you find a decent hair salon who treat you with the respect and dignity you deserve and you feel a million dollars when you leave.

Houseinawood · 27/04/2024 20:55

My darling if you are any where near Bristol my now amazing friend (she became a friend three years ago when she started doing my hair - came recommended) and hairdresser runs a Salon attached to her house on the garden she does great cuts and colours - like in an out building / but she is the most fabulous colourist and nice person and I would gladly pay for your cut and colour. We also have great take away as and pubs near by- I so would love to treat you where you would NOT be ignored. Great pubs nearby too ?? She really is a wonderful hair dresser love her. Also know a fab hairdresser in a Norfolk who would not ignore you.

Birdh0use · 27/04/2024 21:05

I'm so sorry. I hope you feel brave enough to tell them what happened and get a refund.

WildOutThere · 27/04/2024 21:05

Windsofchange99 · 27/04/2024 17:59

We need a go fund me for this lady!! She deserves a special day with a proper hairdresser who is empathetic to what she has been through!!

Why? She just needs to go to another hairdresser and use the money she saved this time.

Scarallo · 27/04/2024 21:10

Calmondeck · 26/04/2024 16:57

I don’t usually place much importance on haircuts but today’s was a big one. My first haircut post brain surgery. I was partially shaved for the operation so have rocked a very misshapen head for the past 8 months. Now I have multiple bolts holding my skull together, and I guess the psychological significance of getting to cut off all of this old hair that remains and starting afresh 8 months on felt big. I researched top hairdressers in my city and booked aiming to make it a special afternoon. I explained to them in advance the scaring and bolts issue. I arranged childcare.

After 4 hours, an hour of which was spent waiting for the hairdresser, and an hour waiting with wet hair while they forgot about me at the sinks… i just got quietly teary, realised I had to leave in order to cross the city and make it home to breastfeed my baby before bed…

now walking through the city with wet hair so disappointed. First world problems I know.

was I ABU for leaving?

As a hairdresser I have to say this is absolutely awful. I would have bent over backwards to make sure it was as perfect as perfect can be. I know the girls I work with would too. I’m so sorry this happened. I would find yourself a local salon, that’s where you find the unexpected. Hairdressers with years of experience. I hope you are at least happy with what has been done xx

Newbie999 · 27/04/2024 21:13

If you live in north west london I will go
there on your behalf and sort them out!

MarvellousMonsters · 27/04/2024 21:24

They absolutely should contact you and rebook and do your hair for free.

Completelydonechick · 27/04/2024 21:25

This is not a ‘first world problem’ . You have had a very serious health condition, that you made them aware of, and this was a very important experience for you. Please don’t underestimate your trauma. And the hairdressers should be bloody ashamed of themselves! You should have been given red carpet treatment. I am so, so sorry that you were put through this, you are absolutely worth so much more xxx sending love and strength xxx

Milliemoo6 · 27/04/2024 21:29

I hope you didn't pay for a blow dry?!

HollyKnight · 27/04/2024 22:44

I had a similar experience in a "designer" hair salon. My friend and I thought we'd treat ourselves to highlights and cuts in an expensive place thinking it would be a really high quality. But in reality they were busy as hell, and we spend most of the time just sitting around waiting for someone to come back and do something. There was a bride-to-be in getting something done and everyone's attention seemed to be on her. She got VIP treatment at least. No other customers seemed to be bothered by it though, so maybe this is just normal for that type of place. Very disappointing experience. I don't blame you for walking out. I was too weak to do that.

dutysuite · 27/04/2024 22:53

If I am kept waiting too long I ask them how long they expect to be because I need to make a decision about whether to stay or not. I can’t stand it when I’m left to sit with wet hair either. I avoid chains too as I find the smaller salons give a better service.

T1Dmama · 27/04/2024 23:15

This is appalling. Did you pay anything? I hope not!! I think you need to spend a little time putting a complaint into writing and on Monday email it across to the salon boss.

T1Dmama · 27/04/2024 23:42

I’d love to hear the 4% of Mumsnetters reason for voting that OP wbu… maybe those people didn’t read the OP & only the title

DBSFstupid · 28/04/2024 01:12

Houseinawood · 27/04/2024 20:55

My darling if you are any where near Bristol my now amazing friend (she became a friend three years ago when she started doing my hair - came recommended) and hairdresser runs a Salon attached to her house on the garden she does great cuts and colours - like in an out building / but she is the most fabulous colourist and nice person and I would gladly pay for your cut and colour. We also have great take away as and pubs near by- I so would love to treat you where you would NOT be ignored. Great pubs nearby too ?? She really is a wonderful hair dresser love her. Also know a fab hairdresser in a Norfolk who would not ignore you.

@Houseinawood What an absolutely lovely post! How kind!

Dontjudgeme101 · 28/04/2024 01:17

I am so sorry, that this happened to you. It really upset me to read this. I hope that they apologise to you and offer you a free haircut. Your ds sounds adorable. You have a wonderful dh too. 💐💐💐

elfies · 28/04/2024 03:06

Has the salon got a facebook page , Name and shame , and make a proper complaint on their page

llizzie · 28/04/2024 03:11

It is weird how people view disabilities. I am sad for the OP. It isn't right, and they should be told right away. They are actually breaking the law. They discriminated against you, and that is wrong.

I fell one day and no one helped until I pulled back my coat and showed my splint.

Justmeee22 · 28/04/2024 03:23

That's disgusting service, even more so with them knowing your personal circumstances.

You most definitely ARE NOT being unreasonable and you should complain to them AND leave them negative reviews on Google and Trustpilot etc.

I hope you didn't pay these fools either.

Efrogwraig · 28/04/2024 08:39

Letter to local newspaper.

cleanasawhistle · 28/04/2024 09:07

OP I am so sorry to hear about your brain surgery and sending you best wishes on your road to recovery.
What an awful time experienced in that hair salon.
Everyone should have been briefed and should have made you feel so special.

A few years ago I lost my hair due to chemo.
I really struggled with it and just wanted my hair back to normal.
I always had hair just past my shoulders so it took a couple of years or so to grow back.
I decided no cuts or colour till I had the length right.
So I booked my friend who is a mobile hairdresser.
Lovely cut and colour and I was so happy.

My awful next door neighbour has the habit of appearing when I am talking to someone...she blanks me and starts a conversation with whoever.
So I am outside chatting to my friend and saying goodbye when the bloody neighbour appeared and did her usual trick.
I came in and slammed the door,talk about having my bubble burst.

GladysOhli · 28/04/2024 09:26

If you tell me the salon details on a DM I'll contact them for you and tell them why they should be deeply ashamed of themselves

GladysOhli · 28/04/2024 09:28

In fact if you can share rough location I'm
Sure we could find a hairdresser on here to help and make you feel as amazing as you are

Hotfeetcoldfeet · 28/04/2024 11:21

Ahhh you are totally not BU but I pressed the wrong button, I’m so sorry. You totally deserved better treatment than that and I’m sorry it wasn’t as you had expected