Brides mother has chosen an identical colour way for outfit

[Snowball777]

Attending son’s wedding in August this year as MOG. I wanted to avoid a clash with the MOB with outfits so asked what she had planned. She was going with pink mix to coordinate with bridesmaids. Based on this I spent a small fortune on a navy blue / lilac outfit and accessories. Five months on she changed her mind and bought an outfit that’s identical in colours to my own. Should I ignore and just go with what I’ve bought? I can’t afford to buy again and it took forever to find a good fit. I’m worried we are going to look like bookends! Any advice on how to handle please.

Unless it's actually the same dress it really won't matter or be that noticeable. I wouldn't give it thought.

Just stick with what you’ve bought. You know how hard it is to find an outfit- she may have wanted to coordinate with the bridesmaids but couldn’t find anything suitable. I wouldn’t hold it against her or be annoyed by this.

I think the best thing is to embrace it - and tell everyone its a wonderful coincidence - it means everyone will know who the mothers are!

Agree - as pp has said, it won't be noticeable unless the same dress.

I've been to weddings where there the bride groom have wanted guests to colour coordinate.

dont let it bother you in the slightest. I’ve been to countless weddings and I couldn’t tell you a single outfit the MOG or MOB wore. No one will notice.

Just stick with what you have bought. It really doesn't matter if you are wearing the same colours.

I bet it's not as noticeable to the other guests as it will be to you, and even if it is, what a nice talking point! If it really bothers you, can you get a hat in a contrasting colour?

I think it will be fine. My mum wore white and mother-in-law wore black and white at my wedding (but both with white jackets and white hats). They looked fabulous together.

the most important thing is that you’re happy with your outfit, please don’t feel you need to change it. You will both look great I’m sure.

I really don't think anyone will be looking at what you're wearing.
You'll be fine.

In the nicest possible way, no one will notice what you are wearing. You have obviously put a lot of care and thought into your outfit, which means you will look great and you shouldn't change it. But just imagine if someone at the wedding thought you had both co-ordinated your outfits, why would it matter? They would still think you look great and they would also think it was a nice thing to so. Really not an issue.

Unless it’s the exact same outfit I wouldn’t worry. Most people won’t notice- you’re way more conscious of what you look like than anyone else is. Even though I’m someone who takes an interest in style and clothes, genuinely I couldn’t tell you what mob/mog wore at any of the weddings I’ve been to (apart from one mob who appeared to have made next to no effort).

If you were pleased with your choice before you knew about hers then you should still be pleased. Let this one go and worry no more!

My mum had similar at my sister’s wedding.

Both Mum and sister’s MIL are tight frugal, so when Debenhams had a very nice little formal dress and jacket set on sale for £99, they (unknowingly) both bought it, in slightly different colourways.

When they saw each other at the venue they both burst out laughing. It looks fine in the photos- nice in fact, as they were standing beside the fathers in their matching suits.

Is it more a case that you are concerned the MOB may be upset that you're both wearing the same colour? Lots of people wouldn't be bothered, but some would. It's not clear whether she already knew what colour your outfit is or why it was you asked her what colour she was wearing other than out of interest. If she knew what you had then stick with your choices and if she didn't it would have been sensible to check with you when she couldn't/didn't get an outfit to co-ordinate with the bridesmaids. I wouldn't attempt to change things now.

Your photos will look good if you’re colour coordinated, better to match than clash!

the only time I’ve noticed what others are wearing, other than the bride, is when I went to wedding where one of bridesmaids ‘forgot’ her dress so wore a snakeskin print tight dress and still expected to be in all the photos.

wear the dress you’ve taken time to choose- you’ll look fabulous 💜

It'll look quite nice on the day having similar colours like you've coordinated especially fur the day

Don't worry it'll make you both stand out in a good way

Surely, the MOB and MOG kind of ARE bookends. 2 mothers, and their offspring.

You'll look really nice together I bet, it'll probably look intentional in a lovely way. Pink, navy and violet sounds like a lovely colour scheme for the photos too.

Its fine and will look more coordinated on the photos (as llong as it isnt the same dress!)

Gosh, I have no idea what either my DM or my MIL wore at my wedding! I don't think this matters. Wear whatever you want.

No one will notice. People will be focusing on the bride and groom .

I really don’t think anyone will notice. As long as you don’t wear white, you’re fine!

I agree with others, that in many ways it’s a nice thing that the two of you will look co ordinated in pictures. Sounds a lovely choice of colours too.

Wear what you bought, you could start a new trend, I actually think it would be nice to have the Mums wearing the same colour

So no one on this thread cares what they themselves wear then?

'no one cares what you wear'

'no one will be looking at you'

My mum and mil wore the same colours it's fine honestly. You was polite and checked so she can't get upset anyway. You will lovely in the same colours in the photos