Brides mother has chosen an identical colour way for outfit

[Snowball777]

Attending son’s wedding in August this year as MOG. I wanted to avoid a clash with the MOB with outfits so asked what she had planned. She was going with pink mix to coordinate with bridesmaids. Based on this I spent a small fortune on a navy blue / lilac outfit and accessories. Five months on she changed her mind and bought an outfit that’s identical in colours to my own. Should I ignore and just go with what I’ve bought? I can’t afford to buy again and it took forever to find a good fit. I’m worried we are going to look like bookends! Any advice on how to handle please.

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Stick with your outfit, having a similar colour will look nice in the photos.

I went to a wedding recently where the MoB and MoG were in the same colours and it worked really nicely & also made it look like they were part of the bridal party which I think can sometimes be tricky as the mums - I presumed it was deliberate but reading your post maybe it wasnt.

I'm imagining if it ever became an etiquette thing for MOB/MOG to matchy match.

'But muuuuum! Sarah's mum is set on hot pink & turquoise accessories. Yes yes I know you're an unrepentant goth & agreed to unblack as far as purple...but muuuum...'

It'll be fine, though, & look nice. Don't worry!

Also I think it’s nice you’ve both told each other what your wearing - my MIL wanted to keep it a surprise and ended up in a long sleeve lace dress, my wedding dress was…long sleeve lace - and the lace pattern & bodice was almost identical and it looks ridiculous in photos.

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you are on the same page already!

I’m another vote for ‘this will look nice.’ Sometimes you get one in red, the other in cerise, hurts the eyes. I do notice what people wear and I’d probably think you got your heads together on it and admire the collegiate approach.

This is the definition of a non-issue

You could buy a large scarf to change the look of the outfit - to some extent..

I had 2 MOG (son in law's mother & step mother) to juggle outfits with. I just told them both the colour I had chosen and described the outfit to them. I said as long as we don't have the same outfit I didn't mind if it was the same colour.
As it was the 2 of them got into a squabble about outfits - I was fine with everything. We all ended up wearing different colours, but I really didn't mind if they had worn the same colour as me

Find a really attention grabbing dress and send her a link saying you couldn't resist so have changed your outfit adding that you will certainly stand out in the photos. She will buy something even more stand out and you can look gorgeous in your navy dress.

Why would it be a problem if the two mothers are wearing the same colours? Surely it will look nicer if they are co-ordinated?

Most guests tend to only look at the bride. I wouldn’t think anyone would notice.🙂

If anyone was to change outfit, it should be her, as you did ask what colour she was going to wear in advance.

Don’t worry about it and enjoy your son’s wedding! Congratulations x

Honestly, I think it's unlikely any guests will pay it any attention and it will look fine on the photos. At my wedding, my mum and MIL wore almost exactly the same colour, which also happened to be the same colour that the bridesmaids were wearing and the usher's ties etc. They were also outfits in a very, very similar style. I have no idea what possessed them- I know they discussed outfits in advance. DH and I had a bit of a (private) laugh about them wanting to be bridesmaids but actually it looked fine on the photos and made the top table look very well co-ordinated! My only real concern on the day was whether my friends would think I'd gone crazy and insisted that they wore matching outfits. If they did, no-one has ever mentioned it (and it was over 20 years ago)

My Mum and MIL wore the same colours. They had different dresses but both looked great. They looked fab with my bridesmaids too. I just wanted everyone to wear something they liked so I was happy they found something they liked.

She's not a character in a soap opera.

I amazed at all the communication there seems to be between the mothers about their frocks, didn't know it was 'a thing'!

My Dds Mil wore similar colours to me it didn't bother me and it looked nice in the photos. I wouldn't worry too much, enjoy your sons wedding.

No need.

The outfits are different just same colours.

Screams nutter or complete biatch...

Wear your outfit. You did a very thoughtful thing in asking and you was thoughtful enough to consider their choices to then make your own.. i don't know a single mil of the groom who has ever cared to be this sweet. And if anyone has an issue you remind them of your intitial due diligence!

Thank you so much for your kind comment. My son is our only child so I wanted to be as accommodating as possible especially as the brides family live quite a distance from us. I’m going to wear my planned outfit and look forward to the day, it’s all about the bride and groom and celebrating their union. xx

Well if someone does notice maybe it will start a trend! Reading all the lovely comments has totally put my mind at rest. It’s going to be an amazing day!