AIBU to be upset with teenage sons?

[OhMyGodIFeelSoSick]

Over the last few days I have been feeling really ill. Even when I had covid twice, I didn't feel this sh!t. I have a congested head, things streaming out my nose, I feel sick and last night I was shaking. I came home from work, had a hot bath to warm me up and lay on the sofa. I couldn't eat as felt too sick, but put something in the oven for them whilst they were out.

They came back, ate, and I asked them to make me a cup of tea. One moaned he was busy and the other made it, but left it to stew for an hour.

This sounds melodramatic, but I was so upset I was crying. I felt so ill, and they can't even ask if I am OK and if I want anything. My DH is away at the moment on business.

This morning I am up, but still feel terrible and the kitchen is a mess. They went to school without checking to see if I was alive.

I'm pissed off. I am such a caring mum and do so much for them and they can't even make me a f*cking cup of tea when I am really sick.

AIBU and how can I get my DS's to not be lazy gits, lacking in compassion to their mum.

You’ve spent all these years modelling that it’s a woman’s job to run around after men. Which leads to lazy male entitlement. Factoring in teen selfishness, it probably never occurred to them that your being ill had any single thing to do with them.

You reap what you sow unfortunately op.

YANBU

1. get better

2. read them the riot act!

Start doling out chores, responsibilities the works

Are you nice to be around?

As well as other useful thoughts here - how well does your DH/DP role model the behaviours that are missing here? I hope he will ask them how well they looked after you and make it clear that decent (male) behaviours include mutual care and consideration, and empathy with someone feeling ill. . Hope you are getting better now.

because, just sometimes, teenagers need to slapped in the face with a wet fish.

I love this and it is so true.

But be reassured OP. It is a teen thing. My ds was like this, despite doing all the things mentioned on this thread, he was fundamentally selfish as a teen. More than my dds actually, but that may be personality.

At 21 he drove down from Uni on mothers day and took me out to lunch.

They do grow up.

eventually