To have avoided the "outstanding" school?

[Thaimoon]

We live in a large city. Pfb is 4, off to school in September.

I admit to being anxious and to overthinking most big decisions I make so throwing this out here for some perspective and the benefit of other's experience.

Just received confirmation that the school we picked as our first choice is the one our child has a place at, all good. On looking round, it seemed a nice school with a good friendly feel to it, it's very diverse and extremely local to us. So, I was happy with this.

Then, preschool tells me that all dc's little friends are off to the outstanding rated primary down the road from us (both schools in walking distance from our home).

We did look around this school too. It has had an outstanding ofsted twice in a row. It is a faith school, and we do not practice any religion in our family. Not necessarily an issue for many, I get this, but I thought it might be a bit confusing for dc.

However, the main thing that put me off was the treatment of a child with learning needs that I witnessed whilst being shown around (by a senior member of staff) which to me was distressing and disturbing to watch.

Its got great academic results and clearly is doing something right. But for me the behaviour I witnessed was a deal breaker.

Just having a last minute wobble about the fact that most of dc preschool parents have picked an outstanding school, and that they won't be with their friends. AIBU to pick a lower rated school based on a gut feeling from one incident I witnessed?

Ofsted ratings are a bit of a dark art.

Some schools absolutely invest in knowing how to tick the boxes, dot the i's and cross the t's.
I can well believe it. It's much the same for CQC inspections which I have endured many of. One of my best friends works at a Trust that was graded Outstanding a few weeks after my workplace got Requires Improvement. Realistically, there's not a massive difference but, in my friend's words "We obviously learned our lines better than you did". Plus all these things measure what is easy to measure, not necessarily what is really important.
I don't think they are useless, but they are open to manipulation and that needs to be borne in mind when reading them.

@Thaimoon you choose the school that feels right for you and your child but can I just address what you saw?

"This particular child was being kept separate from the rest of the class. I understand this may have been for the benefit of the child, but by contrast I saw SEN children amongst the class/their friends and still receiving support at the school we picked"

Having been a volunteer in an outstanding school some children who had SEND and were able to cope with the work being set albeit supported could stay in the class with their peers. There were also some children who were taken out. This is because they were working at a minimum of 2 1/2 - 3 years behind their peers. They were kept with their year group for lots of reasons, friendships, mental and emotional health being two of them. However, children can get very upset if they realise they cannot do what the rest of the class can do, there is only so much differentiation for a lesson. Imagine a year 2 child being put into a year 5 classroom.

Did you ask why that child was out of the classroom? There are also (in every school) children with behavioural issues so violent, non-compliant finger breaking, spitting, kicking, hitting, stripping naked, face licking (because it provokes a response) running out of classrooms children who have an EHCP which names that school and I am sure you would want those children not to be sat next to yours when they are experiencing a negative emotion. Often the triggers are known and they can be removed to a calmer environment. Not all SEND is dyslexia or autism, some are 2 years behind their peers due to behavioural issues that have seen them not engage with work.

We had children who had had brain tumours, cancer or leukemia who were also one to one outside of a classroom plus those who have emotional barriers to learning such as divorcing parents, death of a parent and they are tucked away with a professional counsellor also doing some crafting whilst talking about their feelings. A lovely therapy dog comes in and some of the children read whilst sat stroking the dog, they learn about gentle hands having witnessed domestic violence. Children are complex as are their needs.

Hi @LegItPeg thank you for your reply, I appreciate your point of view and experience.

I realise there will be all sorts of reasons why removing a child from the classroom would be the best thing in some situations, and perhaps I wasn't clear but this in itself was not the thing that disturbed me.

I wasn't going to go into the details of what I saw because didn't feel that a debate on whether or not it was reasonable was the point of my post really.

Let's just say that in this case you are correct that the child had been removed for important reasons and I did not feel that that was respected by the staff we were being shown around by. It caused the child great distress and was very sad to watch.

I think sadly before children start school we have this image in our heads of children sat attentively listening to the teacher in awe when the reality is very different. The staff do their best with the shitty resources they are given ie lack of TAs etc. There are many challenges, if teaching was just teaching and not behaviour management, dealing with low level disruption, children falling out, jealousy over what snack someone has brought in, what lunch bag someone else has etc then it would be a great thing. Not all children are suited to a classroom environment and the school I was in worked really hard to make it as engaging and as fun as possible, running around the playground looking for maths problems to solve, lots of hands on learning rather than just writing in books.

I really hope your child loves their school and you find it a positive experience. I can honestly say hand on heart that my two have had a great time all the way through, Ds2 is now in year 13 so about to start uni in the Autumn.

Thank you @LegItPeg