To wonder what is dangerous about my child’s lunch

[NameChangeAK]

I received a message from school today saying my child’s lunch contained a prohibited item and to please review the policy “as there are children with severe allergies and it’s dangerous not to comply”

I don’t usually provide packed lunches - DC has school meals, but they did like todays meal options.

Ive responded and asked what the item was but waiting for a response, but I’m confused - it’s clearly a nut free school but I can’t see anything else anywhere about other banned foods

the packed lunch contained:

• ham sandwich (with butter) on brown bread
• apple
• frube (strawberry flavour)
• carton of own brand apple juice
• Pepperami
• babybel

any ideas what could be the problem or Aibu to think they’ve mistaken the ham as peanut butter or something ridiculous?

You think Gruyere isn't processed?

Only French cows from the correct parts of France. Didn't you know they are pure even if you process the cheese? British cows are processed though, from the off they're UPFs. We even have concrete ones! 😁

Chicken, tuna or egg sandwich - processed. Or at least I hope so, as raw chicken is not known to be a health food
Fresh fruit - endless choices and combinations
2/3 cubes of gruyere - processed
Small container with natural Greek Yoghurt - processed - and a drizzle of honey - processed
Water instead of juice

If you're going to critique someone's rushed lunch choices for their child, at least learn what processing means. Unless you're on a raw vegan diet, you're eating food that is processed. And that's fine.

How has gruyere only got one ingredient? Surely it has to have at least two, milk and a culture? Probably has rennet as well.

I was pleased to see the OP's update. I can fully understand the school's approach if they have to think about a child with a severe allergy, but I don't think it's right for schools to generally police what parents put in their children's packed lunches otherwise, unless they are being given something really extreme. Most people don't really care too much about having a bit of processed food, and I know from my experience of working with schools that some of them really do use some really crappy ingredients in the lunches.

Maybe you just squeeze them and grueyre pops out.

I’m allergic to pepperoni.

In cubes, no less!

Only 2-3 cubes per person though. After that a drone pops up and shouts at you to stop eating.

It always makes me laugh when mumsnet has to specify the amount/sizes of food that is acceptable for a lunchbox. It can’t be a full sandwich, one piece of fruit and a drink, has to be:

2 triangles of a tuna sandwich
3 and a quarter cubes of cheese
9 grated slithers of a carrot
a fingernail width of a sprout
a 3mx3m tub of natural yogurt with a barrel full of honey
a thimble of water

Any more food than the above and my dd would be absolutely stuffed.

😂

The school are being idiots for not saying what it was and why as it certainly isn't obvious.

Mine are in their 30s and we had weird rules. I objected to Kitkats being OK but Twix were banned. Both are biscuits covered in chocolate. I can't remember the other rules but the Kitkat/twix unfairness stays with me as I like a Twix, particularly if it has come straight from the fridge.

They banned yogurts in dc primary after some exploding in lunch box's

Perfectly fine pack lunch BTW totally what my dc would have taken

I was just about to say it could be the frube - accidental squirting can be a hazard for children with severe allergies. It's a shame the school hadn't been clearer about that in advance.

That reminds me of my friend who told us she had given up chocolate bars for Lent as she tucked into a Time Out - it was fine because it was a biscuit, not a bar

I personally, would respond to them stating very firmly that you are shocked that they have not informed parents of this matter. Such a serious dairy allergy, which we know just touching the product can kill (the poor boy who died when cheese touched his neck at school), that you actually consider them to be negligent in safeguarding the child at risk, and therefore, you're reporting them to Ofsted and the LA. Their current stance of just checking lunchboxes is not robust enough, as products could get overlooked or slip through the net depending on staffing levels etc.

Shame on them. I used to work in Allergen management, and think it's appalling that they've not informed parents of this. They need to be more careful.

I'm glad the school has now clarified, the explanation about frubes squirting makes sense and you probably don't want to stir, but could you point out that you had to prepare something "on the hop" because the only meat options contained beef, which you do not eat for religious reasons?
I guess they'd point out that there was a veggie option, so probably not worth it, but the "awkward squaddie" in my nature feels that if they can be picky without proper explanation........

Mine now in their 20s but we had the lunchbox police on our case too at primary school.
Two things made me laugh about this- firstly when I did a stint in a primary school and saw the huge amount of biscuits and chocolate consumed in the staffroom (the like of which I'd never seen in my regular office), and secondly, as others have said, the completely arbitrary rules they dreamt up (not to do with allergies) which didn't seem to reflect actual nutritional content of food (confirmed at the time by a dietitian friend).
Maybe this was just my DC's school though.

“I smelt like a pub all day” 😁
Reminds me of a former colleague who always used hand sanitiser (pre Covid) and made us all wonder about the strong smell of alcohol whenever he walked past.

I should emphasise that I do not take food allergies lightly; we once catered for a little chap who was so allergic to eggs that he could not even touch an box which previously contained them. The Art teacher adapted her lessons accordingly, we were all shown how to use an epipen, and we safely and successfully managed residential trips with him.
But a blunt message stating "This packed lunch is dangerous" without explaining which component offends, or why, is not satisfactory.

I agree with you. But I don't think most people in real life give a stuff about eating ultra processed foods - it's just on Mumsnet. I can't imagine having a packed lunch without a Peperami, cheese string, or little pork pie when I used to take them into work.

I have NEVER come across a "top-hat" before. Every day's a school day!

So the school didn’t tell parents not to send in frubes, but when parents send in frubes they are sent shitty messages with no explanation and their child is denied some of their lunch?

Fuck that. It takes a lot for me to think a complaint to school is appropriate but talking away a child’s food without informing all parents that it isn’t allowed is completely unfair.

If gruyère is fine but Babybels are bad- what happens if you give them one of those gruyère Babybels you get in Canada?

OP, I just had a babybel in your honour. Love them. My toddler stopped eating them months ago. I still buy them. For me.