To ask stranger if I can dig up their tree in the garden?

[WaffleDogg20]

My dad had a stroke that left him wheelchair bound and without a voice. when I was 16 which caused my parents to lose their house as they couldn’t afford their mortgage. They were homes in a bungalow. a few months after moving in my mum was diagnosed with cancer, for her 60th birthday all she wanted was this specific cherry tree.

we managed to find one and bought it her and it was then planted in the middle of their garden. It was extremely special to both my parents. Sadly my mum died a few months later but for the last 12 years my dad tenderly looked after this tree and every year he would make us pick the cherries for him. We would find him many times just looking at it in the garden.

my dad died last year and in the rush of having to be out of the council bungalow the Tree was left.

its my biggest regret in life so far and every time I think about it I cry. It’s still in the garden as if drove past a few times.

would I be unreasonable to offer the new tenants a good sum of money to be able to take it? I would love to replant it in my garden as it holds so many memories with my dc.

I don’t know what to do :(

You can certainly ask.

Sorry for your loss. A mature tree would be very difficult to transplant and not guaranteed to survive the move, even if they did agree (which I also think is unlikely).
I would try and move on from the original tree and plant another lovely tree (or trees) in your parents memory.

I would ask. All the can say is no. Could you maybe offer to replace it with something of their choice?

I think you wouldn’t be u to send them a very polite letter and ask, but it’s worth thinking through all the associated costs and risks, and definitely don’t doorstep them about it.

Before you write that I think you should - if you haven’t already - do some careful research into what’s involved in digging up a 12 year old tree and how it may not survive transplantation. You’d also need to pay to make good the new occupants’ garden because the roots will be very extensive.

I'd assume the cherry is very well established after 12 years and it would cause considerable damage to remove it (potentially to the tree as well as the garden). It would be worse to take it and the tree die than it flourish and grow in a garden your parents loved.
I do feel for you. Can you buy the same breed of cherry and plant it as a tribute to your parents?

Ask. If they say no because they love the tree then you may have some peace knowing that it’s still being treasured.

You can ask but don't be surprised at all if they say no. If it's that well established it would be a major undertaking to dig it up and move it safely (think jcb, crane, flatbed hgv), and there's no guarantee it will thrive in it's new location.

Why not try and reframe your thoughts, and smile when you see it, imaging new families and generations enjoying it as your dad did.

Maybe knock and ask for a cutting to pot and grow your own offshoot tree?

Or you could ask to take a few cuttings, and hopefully one of those would establish.

Certainly worth asking. I would worry it will be difficult to take up and re-establish elsewhere if it’s a mature tree, though — would it upset you more if you transplanted it and it died?

The issue would be whether it would transplant well or not. I say this because I dug up a well established small cherry tree and moved it elsewhere in my garden. Sadly it didn't survive. Transplant plant shock is a thing. I recommend purchasing a similar tree from a nursery and planting that in your garden and getting the kids to nurture it. My feeling is that even if you got permission to dig it up fine the original garden and then it didn't survive this might be even sadder for you.

Our cherry trees haven't been the same since we paved our front drive. They are still in the same spot with the same roots.

I would not risk transplanting it personally. Plant a tree in your garden in memory. Do it with your kids. Make a new memory.

I would ask them for a cutting from the tree if that's possible. Cherry trees are prolific and spread like crazy. I'm sure you could grow a baby from the original tree.

Taking a cutting from it would likely ensure the survival of the old tree and a knew tree would flourish. I don’t think it’s odd to ask though. If you want to take the whole thing, do ask a tree surgeon.

Would you consider buying the same one in honour of your parents and planting it in your garden?I think this has a better chance of survival. Plus how gutted will yoh be if you move it and it dies, which it has a very high chance of.

I would ask to take cuttings. It would be hard to move and it would awful if it didn’t thrive in your garden after.

I wouldn’t, for the simple reason that as a pp said it can be difficult to transplant mature trees and if you moved it and it dies I think you would feel really awful. Can you not reframe it in your mind as growing happily in the place where your mum put it?

Sorry for your loss

You don't need the whole tree to have a connection

Suggest
Take 4 photos of the tree
Winter, spring, summer, autumn
Frame into one photo frame

Or

Take 12 photos of the tree, one per month & put into one photo frame

Or

Take some blossom & leaf & have some jewellery made

Or

Sunrise, midday, evening, night photos

The cost for reimbursement of a 12 year old tree, plus making the garden right again will be a couple of thousand. You'll require heavy machinery and some strength to list and move it.

At the end of it, the tree will likely get transplantation shock and die.

What I would do is write a letter, explain the significance of the tree and ask to take some cuttings of the tree.

They will be genetically identical.

You can propagate a cherry from hardwood cuttings in the winter, or semi ripe cuttings earlier in the year quite successfully and inexpensively. The best thing is that it would be without risking your parents tree at all.

Same tree is a great idea.

I'm sorry for your losses, op. I can see why you would want to do this, but I agree with pp, it will likely permanently damage the tree if you get permission to move it.

A cutting grafted to a new tree is a brilliant idea, and can be symbolic to your dc of how they are the next generation in the family, with a history of loving generations before them.

I think moving a tree of that size will be tricky, and potentially kill the tree.
Taking a cutting, growing a tree from a cherry, or buying a nursery tree of the same variety would likely lead to greater sucess (and if I was in the house now, a cutting or seeds I would agree to, removing the tree would be a negative reponse).

Also, you mention tenants. If the people living there don't own it, they can't agree to it being removed.

They are pretty easy to take cuttings from or plant from the stone - mine self seeded everywhere! It's not usually possible to transplant a large tree safely.

Ask for a cutting, it will in effect be the same tree (a bit like Groot is Groot in Guardians of the Galaxy!) to enable you to have one and the mature tree to remain where it should (for its own sake remain). I think it you explain then most people will be willing to give you a cutting. If you are unsure as to how and what to cut and then plant I am sure a gardener would be willing to do so

Iv just googled it and the cherry trees look huge but it wasn’t like that at all. Here’s a pic, it’s to the left x

ask they can only say no. fwiw i had an established cherry tree taken out my garden a couple of years ago and it didnt take long