Help DH won't wear speedos but going to France!

[letitgoletitgo6]

Taking DCs to Disney land Paris in May. DH has severe body dysmorphia and getting clothes that he will wear is a nightmare as he genuinely hates the way he looks (there's absolutely nothing wrong with the way he looks but it's not as easy as just telling him that!)

So I've recently found out about the law in France about all men and boys having to wear speedos when swimming. We aren't staying at Disney we are staying at the centre parks so we definitely plan on going swimming. He's point blank refusing to wear them which I do completely understand as he will worry about it every hour until we go. However if he doesn't go then non of us can go in as Dc are small and can't swim without help and I can't help both on my own. Is there a speedo alternative that's a bit more body forgiving that I could suggest to him?

Have been to the centre parcs outside Disney 3 times, all through times there were multiple nationalities with hardly a speedo in sight including my husband.

@Wolfiefan yes he's under a mental health specialist team and is currently trialing a change of medication which we hope will help. He suffered a huge bereavement earlier this year so things took a bad turn so the team are very on top of things at the moment.

@Ginmonkeyagain

Some municipal pools also require swimming caps.

I'd forgotten about that rule - yes some places do have a swimming cap rule too!

It is and if you go and have shorts on they will kick you out… it’s non negotiable!

so if the bloke ain’t going to wear them he ain’t going swimming

This rule is quite site specific. Some places enforce it. Many places don’t.
Find out if village nature do or not before you do or yourself in knots.
Try the Disneyland Paris Facebook groups for brits. Lots of knowledge.

The outdoor pool in. Alpe d’huez has a sign saying “this is a swimming pool not a washing machine”. They’re very touchy about anything that could be deemed “clothes” rather than “swimwear” going in the pool.

I think you should take both children swimming and if he won’t comply with the rule (or risk board shorts) then he will have to lose out.

you can take two small people swimming, you just need to be prepared, have the right swimming aids on the children before the approach the water and ensure they
stay close to you.

your husband need to put the children’s needs above his and perhaps also access some help with this dysmorphia if he hasn’t already

My son and husband wore shorts type when we went to Disneyland Paris, I hadn’t even considered it wouldn’t be accepted 😂😂 I’ve learnt something new

What a ridiculous rule in any case. What do they think happens in pools in every other country 🤣
do they not know babies pee in pools? Shorts or rash guards should be the least of their concerns!

Every country has their oddnesses. Most of the world think our obsession with not having electrical outlets in bathrooms is insane.

OP I’m so glad he’s seeking help and support and so sorry for his loss. Would it be better if he just didn’t swim on this holiday and so take the pressure off?

Hopefully you should be ok. But take both to be sure. I have two daughters and we went swimming in a local leisure centre. The kids had come in to the female changing with me and DH was stopped from entering the pool but I wasn't aware of what had happened because he wasn't allowed to leave the male changing .
I was stuck, baffled with two very young children who couldn't swim in the pool until he got a message to me via another man with 'appropriate ' swim wear

@CurlyhairedAssassin that's a really kind thing to say thank you!

You don't need to wear Speedos at Centre Parcs.

https://www.johnlewis.com/speedo-hyper-boom-spliced-swim-shorts/p110199606?size=32&sppc=2dxxmixedfashionnBAU&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gadsource=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjw8pKxBhDDARIsAPrG45n2gyES8WG3zhhX3P7fsrtshoUBydCDy-n2yVns8Hxp0iZElAMRMAwaAkFaEALwwcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

This style is ok, they don't need to be brief style.
Most men wear swim shorts over the top to the pool. I've had the same issue with exh he refused but this was at an independent camp site, at Disney they allowed swim shorts

It’s for hygiene purposes. In Italy you have to wear swimming hats too.

We've been to a different French CP and DH definitely wore normal British loose fitting swimming shorts, he doesn't own a pair of speedos.

What a ridiculous rule in any case. What do they think happens in pools in every other country 🤣
do they not know babies pee in pools?

Baby pee is not as rank as grown men in dirty shorts . The implication being that they might also be peeing in the pool if their understanding of basic hygiene is so poor!

Obviously not always fair, as I think we have established in the case of the OP's husband, he should be allowed to wear whatever he wants.

In Spain (indoor pools, inland not on the costas) they are obsessed with swimming hats and wearing flip flops around the pool. Every country is different. I keep two swimming hats in my suitcase now and we both always take flip flop. My now dp prefers speedos so no issues there (in fact in the canaries he embraced the clothing optional rule! So different to exh and his body image issues)

So you could wear a skanky pair of cycling shorts that you just cycled there in because they are tight but not loose shorts. Batshit.

I have seen people ordered out of the swimming pool in France on several occasions - men in shorts, women in burkinis, people wearing t-shirts. This is on campsites. Swimming trunks just have to be closefitting so lycra style shorts should be fine. Center Parcs may not actually have the rule.

DP had this in the municipal pool when we lived in Portugal. He had to wear Speedos and a swimming cap. He was not amused.

Hygiene- so it’s dedicated swimwear, not what you’ve worn at the beach or in your garden.

OP, we’ve stayed in plenty of euro camp sites and it wasn’t required there - DH wore his Bermuda shorts. But it was in a local authority run swimming pool with slides etc in Brittany.

Get him some jammers in black - they were fine.

The law is to prevent people from using municipal pools as a communal shower/laundry facility. Seems a little paranoid but that's how it was explained to me.

OP, he can definitely wear shorts that are tight like jammers, don't have to be high cut like a classic Speedo. Not sure about a rash guard.

This , it's not the law and will be fine in normal shorts