Help DH won't wear speedos but going to France!

[letitgoletitgo6]

Taking DCs to Disney land Paris in May. DH has severe body dysmorphia and getting clothes that he will wear is a nightmare as he genuinely hates the way he looks (there's absolutely nothing wrong with the way he looks but it's not as easy as just telling him that!)

So I've recently found out about the law in France about all men and boys having to wear speedos when swimming. We aren't staying at Disney we are staying at the centre parks so we definitely plan on going swimming. He's point blank refusing to wear them which I do completely understand as he will worry about it every hour until we go. However if he doesn't go then non of us can go in as Dc are small and can't swim without help and I can't help both on my own. Is there a speedo alternative that's a bit more body forgiving that I could suggest to him?

We've just come back from Disneyland, we stayed at villages nature before heading to Explorers hotel, then on to Santa Fe. Everyone was wearing normal swimming shorts, it's not enforced at villages nature, or at Explorers, or at the official Disneyland hotels that have pools.

@letitgoletitgo6

Could you get him one of those towels you put over your head. So he is covered up & then flings it off just before getting in?

amzn.eu/d/9tq4TV4

If it’s taking him an hour of stressing with you before he can get in the water, perhaps swimming is not the activity for him? I’d be worried about what your children are learning from that tbh. Is there someone else you can take with you to swim so he isn’t needing to get into that state?

OP you sound like a kind and understanding wife.

Zut alors; makes Spain and Greece seem a lot more appealing suddenly.

I suggest you go to a big Decathlon and pick from their range. We went to a small French town pool last summer and every single person in it had Deca stuff on!

What's stopping them from already wearing them under their shorts before they get to the pool, though?

It's a hygiene thing. You can't wear anything in the pool that could possibly be worn as outerwear. Some municipal pools also require swimming caps.

Mr Monkey got ordered out of an outdoor river fed lido in Lyon for wearing baggy, mid thigh surf shorts. They are actually swim trunks but tbf of a sufficient thickness and baggyness that means they can be worn outside without outraging public decency (he often wears them to the beach).

Quite right OP, a shit thing to write by Seashor.

@LostMySocks how do you shower without being naked?

Did know this was a rule but makes a lot of sense.

No advice OP. I presume swimming is optional?

Don’t worry this often comes up on the Center parcs Europe for Brits group on Facebook and I don’t think CP enforce it like some camp sites etc do!

Please listen to the people who have stayed at Villages Nature (as we have, this year) who are telling you that it's absolutely not the rule there. I don't think we saw a single man in speedos! Everyone was in 'normal' (in Britain) swimshorts. Several men in swim tops too.

I know this probably won't be enough to reassure your DH, but this rule means men in France of all ages, sizes and body types generally wear tiny speedos to go swimming both in pools and on the beach.

another thing about the hygiene thing. People could easily be wearing them as underwear all day under normal shorts around town, sweating and going the toilet numerous times, for hours on end. Then they could go the pool, strip off their shorts and into the pool they go with their skanky worn-all-day Speedos.

It has never been enforced at any of the campsites we’ve stayed at in France

We've got a static in La Rochelle and it is budgie smugglers only and they are very strict. Have been to to DLPand stayed at sequoia and anything was allowed. It's not a law, it's venue specific.

That makes sense, we have only gone to beaches or public authority pools in France so have seen it enforced strongly. I can imagine more touristy places may be less rigorous.

It also applies to women, I have seen places that only allow bikinis or one pieces and ban burkinis or any kind of loose top.

It's crazy to me too. We were there last year and I wasn't allowed in the pool in a sports shirt (like swimming costume material) that I'd put on to keep my skin out of the sun. Burkinis and things also prohibited. Kids all in one sun suits...nope. everyone had to be in the skimpiest swim wear. We're all super fair skinned and most of the pools had no shade. Put me off going back

For good measure, here's a link to CP EU's FAQs about the Aqua Mundo, stating that you can wear shorts.
https://www.centerparcs.eu/in-en/faq/10_my-stay#where-can-I-find-more-information-about-aqua-mundo

Thanks everyone, looks like it's not enforced where we're going which is good! Thank you so much for all the helpful comments. Just to answer a couple of comments of course I would never force dh to go swimming but it's something he really wants to do as he loves the bonding with the kids once he's in the water it's just the lead up to it that gets him in a state. It's not something the kids are aware of. We are very careful with what the kids witness. His mental health has been absolutely awful for the past ten years so we are very good at keeping things under control around the kids by now.

Whereas it has been on the majority of the ones I've been on in the last 35 years. At the one we stayed in last year, the lifeguards spent their whole day watching for people getting in the pool in shorts, even children.

Proper swimming shorts are always ok. Surf shorts with 2 layers (one netting and one outer) won't be allowed if they're enforcing the rules.

I would check the policy of where you’re going. Get him to pack what he’s most comfortable in. If he can’t swim then you’ll have to go in without him and he will have to look after the kids.
I do hope he’s in treatment for this though. It’s no good simply saying he can’t help it and you have to talk him into getting into the pool. None of this will do your kids any good as they get older and are aware of these issues.

I've not seen burkinis banned. In fact, DH got told off for wear a rash vest and pointed out to the guard a group of women dressed in these: Women's 3 Piece Swim Set | Speedo

Guard just shrugged.

another thing about the hygiene thing. People could easily be wearing them as underwear all day under normal shorts around town, sweating and going the toilet numerous times, for hours on end. Then they could go the pool, strip off their shorts and into the pool they go with their skanky worn-all-day Speedos.

You'd have to be a pretty committed soap dodger to do that though, wouldn't you? Even water polo players don't find them comfortable out of the water! 😂

You can wear trunks. Just not shorts