To feel like cancelling whole party due to stress?

[partypoopp]

I mean I won't really do that (although I want to!), but I don't know what to do.

DD is very clever. Birthday party this weekend. Booked x amount of places, can't do more. Dd found spare invitations and invited other children she hadn't already invited. Phone bombarded with 'thank you, we'd love to come messages' (some asking if they can bring younger sibling). AIBU to just want to cancel at this point? Don't know what to do 😭

How old is she? I think my just turned 7 year could have done something similar not quite realising the cost/ logistics of parties (his only barrier would be they he wouldn't be arsed to actually write any invites). My 9 year old would know this was wrong and naughty.

Sorry what?

What age is DD?

Time for mum to start being the grown-up.

You now have contact details of all the parents. Send a group message out to all parents explaining exactly what happened.

You had limited numbers. Your daughter wanted other close friends to attend and went behind your back, inviting other friends, not realising the consequences.

List the children on the original list who are invited. Apologise that daughter changed her mind so many times and wanted everyone to be there - but the only fair way is to stick to the original list.

Just apologise, apologise, apologise.

State it's a learning curve for both you and your daughter.

If you do it right, you'll get a lot of support and sympathy from the other parents.

But that's assuming some of the invites are in childish hand-writing - and your daughter did this.

If something has happened and you can no longer afford a party - just say grandparent illness/ family issue and cancel. And say you'll make it up to everyone next year. And move on.

But PS: Never, ever accept responsibility for a child's sibling. A;ways, always state that it's not a problem, but the parent obviously needs to stay, pay and be responsible for the other sibling. That is always non-negotiable.

This is really pretty hideous behaviour depending on her age. It’s not clever at all. It’s at best selfish. Most importantly she needs to understand the potential consequences of her behaviour- disappointing kids who thought they had been invited.

Good grief, do you always take everything so seriously? And you're not the only one! What a po-faced lot some of you are.

I thought it was funny personally. Naughty but funny.

I'd also find it funny to make my child do jobs to "earn" the money to pay for the extra guests.

So she's been devious and you're going to reward this by allowing the party to go ahead?

Good luck when she's 16 then.

@partypoopp what age is dd

From a practical point of view, I think the first thing to do is establish exactly who has received the 'additional' invitations...even if you politely explain to those who have responded to you, there may be some who fail to RSVP but turn up anyway (terrible manners, but not unknown!).

Youngsters can be quite naive about the logistics and cost of planning a party - you know your daughter so you know the level of understanding as to how much chaos it would cause she may or may not have had.

The natural consequences of this will be that she will probably have upset a few of her peers and will have to deal with the repercussions of this. I wouldn't cancel the party, nor would I facilitate the extra guests (and it doesn't sound like this would be a possibility anyway).