Would you raise an eyebrow? Can’t work as teenager sick

[Asprogata]

Lovely sunny day (destined to be busy) at a visitor attraction and a key team member (head chef) phoned to say they couldn’t come in as their child had a migraine (16 in a couple of months).

Child is not neuro diverse and no other issues raised about their physical/mental health (which appears otherwise good).

Would you raise an eyebrow?

If you’re the manager do you really think this is an appropriate thing to post?

If people agree it’s an issue and you did decide to bring it up with your team member how would you feel if they showed you a screenshot of this post and said they believe you’ve handled it inappropriately?

I, an adult, had such bad norovirus that my mum took the day off work to look after me. I’m glad her colleagues were supportive and not judgmental. I needed another adult to care for me.

That's bonkers. My child gets migraines so I know the horror of them, but I’d never dream of being off my work

You obviously haven’t ever experienced or witnessed a severe migraine attack

@Asprogata what dp you want from this thread? Everyone to join you in mocking how awful the dc and staff member is?

I thought migraines were a legally protected disability. I don’t think it is right to disfavour a parent who has had to call off work to care for a child with a legally protected disability. Staff being off isn’t reserved to the one member who has it worst. It is irrelevant that another staff member has a child with something else that you’ve said is totally different.

No I wouldn't have raised an eyebrow because my sister's migraines leaves her completely helpless. She becomes incapacitated, delirious and vomits everywhere. YABU because you don't understand how horrific they are for the sufferer. They are completely different to headaches, my sister says it's like having labour pains inside her head.

You really can’t be off work because your adult child is unwell

I haven’t posted anything anything identifying and am looking for advice. This is allowed.

I suffered crippling migraines during an extremely abusive childhood and I struggle to sometimes understand what the accepted position on this sort of stuff is. Largely the responses support the employee. I will take this advice on.

I’ve had people griping at me that it is unfair and have sought a more rounded view here.

So what is your particular problem?

They come in different severities. DD gets some milder ones where she’s absolutely fine to be left alone and sleep it off but there are also times where she literally couldn’t even get out of bed if she wanted/needed to in order to get water, medication etc. The hallucinations especially can be very severe, I wouldn’t dream of leaving her alone like that

16 is an adult? And yes you can when it is a legally recognised disability. You can be the carer of a disabled person of any age- adulthood is irrelevant.

You are incredibly naive and fortunate to be able to hold this opinion

I mean, you absolutely can if you have a supportive employer. I manage people and have had people rush off to check on unwell partners and older teens. It’s give and take. If they’re otherwise a good employee, I won’t penalise them for the occasional incident.

16 is an adult in Scotland.

I wouldn’t raise an eyebrow as I’ve witnessed how bad they can be in person. My cousin has them and loses her vision which sounds very scary!

My advice would be to tell the whinging employees that other people’s personal life is none of their business. They have no right to question why another person is off unless they’re the manager.

The child is on social media. They do not have a debilitating migraine. No the employee should not be off.

You have reason to suspect they were not telling the truth because the child was on social media throughout the day?
I wouldn’t have thought you’d be able to be updating your socials when you have a migraine. So I can see your point!

Wiki says that was raised to 18 in 1991?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_Legal_Capacity_(Scotland)_Act_1991

I've had serious migraines and my husband literally needed to carry me in for a wee. Then clean my teeth for me and put me to bed. I was staggering all over the place and begging for help in intense pain.

Not my greatest moment but I would have not coped being alone!

Well, legally and morally, there are employers who value their employees and would facilitate the occasional day off if an adult child was extremely unwell.

Is it an ongoing issue ? Because I’d it’s not a regular occurrence I would give them the benefit of the doubt. I wouldn’t leave my child alone in the house if I was worried about them. So if they were having a horrific migraine and literally couldn’t get out of bed I probably wouldn’t leave them.

This thread is completely inappropriate and incredibly identifying to any of the staff involved.

I agree with this, wouldn’t be able to even think about looking at a screen with a migraine!

It it not identifying as I have changed many of the key details