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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really upset and angry that DH thinks HIS snoring is MY problem?

22 replies

SugarSkyHigh · 30/03/2008 10:37

basically i am woken every single night and am beginnning to suffer from the broken sleep. fine if it's for a DC but NOT if it's for this stupid reason!

DH thinks i'm over reacting, is cross because he often has to go and sleep on the sofa, and when i suggested he go and look into remedies / take responsibility / be proactive, instead of complaining that he has to sleep on the sofa, he says i'm the one with the problem not him!

please ..... !!!

OP posts:
cornsilk · 30/03/2008 10:38

Tell him to sleep on his side.

chamaeleon · 30/03/2008 10:38

try those snoring strips they stick over their nose, my dad snores really badly and they have helped my mum a lot!

if he isnt just trying to be funny then no, yanbu

Bumperlicious · 30/03/2008 10:45

Oh, no advice but that is rubbish! Can you record him snoring and play it to him so he realises. Snoring can actually be quite detrimental to the snorer too so it is in his interest to do something about it.

DH snores occasionally and I have made him start wearing those breathe right strips. They help a bit (as does a kick in the shin).

notalone · 30/03/2008 10:59

I have heard those strips work miracles too. And I would second the recording him as well. Maybe he doesn't realise how bad it actually is.

Do not stick tampons up his nose to shut him up though!!! Seriously I remember reading about a woman who got so fed up with her hubbie snoring she did this and he suffocated.

edam · 30/03/2008 11:01

I third the recording - dh thought I was making a fuss until I did this. He was shocked. So much so he eventually had surgery. Sadly the effects (which were brilliant) didn't last so we are back to separate rooms.

jellies · 30/03/2008 11:08

I would be his problem if you woke him up every time he started to snore...

themoon66 · 30/03/2008 11:12

jellies... that is what I do.. wake him up. Or stuff corner of duvet into his mouth.

Also, be really really grumpy the next day and when he asks what's up with you, say you've had weeks of broken sleep, that's what!

My DH finally went to doctors and got a referral to the hospital about his snoring. He had a nose full of polyps apparently, which they snipped out under general anaesthetic.

motherhurdicure · 30/03/2008 11:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CatBert · 30/03/2008 11:13

Perhaps you should show him this link

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snoring

It's very bad for his health. And yours.

YANBU.

WowOoo · 30/03/2008 11:14

We argue about this so often it's driving me mad. I try to get him to change position as this def helps. Also, I always try to get to bed and fall asleep before he gets to bed (but this doesn't always work!!)

Original poster
SugarSkyHigh · 30/03/2008 11:24

Catbert, i clicked on the link and read down through the subheadings. when i got to 'Positioning' I actually read it as 'Poisoning' which didn't strike me as out of place, i am that pissed off with the whole thing!

yes have tried strips, they don't work. Perhaps should try again because a lot of you recommend them, perhaps we used a bad brand or something.

i am always kicking him and shoving him. That's why he gets cross and says I am disturbing HIM!!

OP posts:
edam · 30/03/2008 13:00

MH, don't think it would apply to your dh, mine had all his 'throat furniture' removed.

rookiemater · 30/03/2008 14:58

Have you tried wax earplugs. DH doesn't snore too loudly but I have found that those, coupled with a super king size bed have made it bearable.

hecate · 30/03/2008 15:20

well, technically it IS your problem, becuase it's a problem for you that you get woken up. So he's right. He sleeps right through it, he doesn't have a problem with his snoring.

So since it's your problem, you need to solve it by waking him up every single time he disturbs you and making him turn over. Tell him "Yes darling you are right, it is my problem. I cannot sleep. Therefore I am solving MY problem by removing the cause. You. Sofa. Now."

Babymumma · 30/03/2008 15:38

My df snores so he went to gp who reffered him to a clinic. They gave him a nasal spray called Nasonex which is a hayfever remedy this works along with a vicks nasal spray & a nose strip!! Bless him, he is terrified I will make him have surgery unless he uses all these things but it DOES work. The only time I kick him onto the sofa now is when he's had a drink as nothing will stop the noise then! lol

DonDons · 30/03/2008 18:31

My DH is a chronic snorer and was on the verge of having surgery after trying all of the other things mentioned below (they didn't work). I would literally spend at least 50% of a week in the spare room and holidays were a complete nightmare (no escape...) - the snoring was putting a reall strain on our relationship.

He then got told about these by my dad's wife (she's a dental surgery assistant and her boss makes something similar for his patients). They work wonders - he doesn't snore anymore and he says that he sleeps better with it as the snoring sometimes wakes him up too. I think the option 1 one is worth a try (I think it was about £25) - DH has moved on to the option 2 one now as he finds it more comfortable. HTH

lovecat · 30/03/2008 22:10

Is he overweight? I was on the verge of stabbing DH in the night thanks to his horrendous on-off snoring, but now he's lost nearly 2 stone he hasn't snored once. Miracle! (and I don't risk getting 20 years for frenzied stabbing attack screaming 'let me sleep, you BASTARD!!!!')

Soprana · 30/03/2008 22:26

Snoring is potentially VERY bad for the health of snorers and those who have to listen to /be kept away by them. Snorers are more at risk of heart attacks and stroke than non smokers. Your DH should see his doctor, or preferably a specialist. There's something new now called CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway Pressure) which apparently works for most snorers. See here www.britishsnoring.co.uk/index.php for more info on snoring.
Good luck!

chipmonkey · 30/03/2008 22:28

My dh and his 2 brothers suffer from sleep apnoea which causes horrendous snoring. They have all now attended a sleep clinic and have CPAP machines to use at night which means no more snoring, yay!
I have to say, dh didn't realise how bad he was until we were staying at the inlaws and he heard his brother snoring and was horrified by it. He was utterly shocked when I told him that his brother's snoring was identical to his!
It is worth getting checked out, just in case it is sleep apnoea. For one thing, it is life-threatening, and secondly dh and the BILs are like different people when they use the CPAP. They actually get a proper night's sleep and function a lot better in work ( and as human beings generally!)

cmotdibbler · 31/03/2008 10:06

Sleep clinics can do marvels with snoring - from the mouthpieces that pull the jaw forward, to surgery for polyps etc, to CPAP for OSA.

My DH snored really terribly for years, until I finally made him go to GP and get referred. Sleep study showed that he stopped breathing 87 times an hour, and is now on CPAP. It is wonderful to have a peaceful nights sleep, and like Chipmonkey, DH is a MUCH nicer person to have around !

hanaflower · 31/03/2008 10:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

vixnpips · 31/03/2008 11:26

ohhh snoring....
Have just made an appointment for Dh to go back to GP... this time with ME, as it's me it's affecting!
We have tried the strips, the sprays and the sleeping in different parts of the house

and he still wakes me up ( I can sleep happily through the loudest storms but not the snoring from DH )

The trouble with recording it.. I did this .. is that it didn't show a fair representation of actually how loud he is.

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