AIBU to not do homework with reception age DC?

[SunStorms]

I fear I may be…

I didn’t go through the UK education system and didn’t start learning to read and write until I was 7 so the UK system is alien to me. We never had homework at primary age so I have no idea what is normal here.

I read to my reception age DC every night, we do lots of craft activities, learn about nature, science and history together, they have a great general knowledge, I thought I was doing fine as a parent but…

School send home a reading book, a phonics and maths worksheet every few weeks. We do them. It seemed like a lot to me as I never had homework at 7, let alone 4!

Except it seems the school expected me to be practicing reading/phonics and maths with them using an app regularly. We relocated to the UK just before DC started school so I missed the parents’ induction meeting. We haven’t been doing it until another mum mentioned it on a play date. The school hasn’t said anything but after asking other parents, it seems everyone else has been doing it daily or at least several times a week. I feel awful 😞 My DC is a long way off the end of year goals. I had no idea.

If you are in the UK, how often do you practice writing, reading, phonics, maths etc with your reception age child? Daily, several times a week, weekly, occasionally, never? How long do you spend doing it?

I thought I could make a personalised poll in AIBU but I can’t even get that right 😩

If the school want you to do it they'll let you know.

I appreciate you're new to it all but you need to ask the school what is expected, if you missed the induction.

No, parents need to make a stand. There is no need for homework in primary school, except reading practice and learning times tables.

Using books, not apps.

Unfortunately, you get aspirational parents going on about homework and schools feel duty bound to set it. Why they can't just make it optional I don't know.

I fundamentally disagree with homework.

We talk about work life balance for adults but think it's ok to give small kids homework after being at school for six hours.

It wasn't normal in the UK until the 90s or 2000s for primary children to have homework. If you think your child has done enough don't force them to do more. My daughter, a teacher herself, didn't make her children do it and they're fine. They have to do their Secondary school homework.

I was a Reception teacher myself and didn't give any homework other than sending a reading book home and letting parents know what phonics we were working on.

Our school does a reading book on an app which they expect you to do daily and then weekly worksheets for writing practice.

We do the reading book a couple of times a week and the worksheets which take max 15 mins. We do other reading as well with our own/library books.

I think if the teacher was worried they would have flagged it to you earlier

I do phonics with my 4 year old most days, my 10 year old goes in to school and then I have 10 to 20 minutes sat in the car with my 4yo so we do phonics then. Read every night and she found some old workbook left over from covid which she likes to do of her own accord.

Oh honestly, that's bonkers isn't it?

Speak to your dc's teacher and ask them what you need to be doing though.

School send home a reading book, a phonics and maths worksheet every few weeks. We do them.

So you are doing homework?

Just do the reading book and sack the rest off.

We read every school night for around 10-15 minutes.

Listening to them read as often as possible is a good habit to get into. I wouldn’t worry about much more than that, only if you have the time and the will. School is tiring enough for small children.

Rubbish. I went to primary in the mid/late 80s and we had reading, maths, spelling and write a short story using the new words we've learned as homework during the week or weekend.

This was a very bog standard primary in a deprived area.

I get annoyed when middle class folk who can afford to tutor or private school their way out generalise and mislead. Homework is normal for primary school and where children start school later, their kindergartens are very much like our reception years.

Reading, 10 minutes a day. If they get a phonics reading scheme book changed once a week read it three times to improve fluency then read something from home or the library that they enjoy. The first read through sounding out, the second with improved fluency, the third check comprehension and practice retelling the story in their own words.
My daughter now in Y5 also has 5 shorts maths tasks (5-10min each) per week and weekly spellings. In Y3-4 the maths was an app (TT rockstars)
I volunteer to read with struggling Y1, having parents that practise at home makes a huge difference.

If your reception child is willing to do homework and has fun, no problem. But if they are reluctant and don't want to do it, I can't honestly think of a better way of putting them off learning altogether than making them do it at home as well as at school.

Where did you go to school? Are your children bilingual?

I wasn't in UK school either but I suppose school has changed both i UK an my native country since I attended it. Not sure you can compare 1:1.

Talk to the teachers what you are expected to do and help your child with.

For our children it was reading (10-20 min a day), writing, spelling and math the first years of school.

The school sounds really obsessive

We get a phonics book (for them to read) and a fiction reading book (to read to them). No maths worksheets or anything like that. My daughter is meeting and exceeding I believe the EYFS now with a term left to go so she's not missing out on anything. We often read extra to her, leave a supply of pen and paper out for her to do any writing/drawing that she desires and she listens to a story player. I think it's also important for children to learn in different ways outside of school too. I know my daughter gets so much from being at Rainbows just like she does at school.

I think our school do maths homework from year 2 and then nothing really extra until year 7 (secondary from year 8 here) to prepare them for the level of work from secondary school.

I refused to do homework with mine. We read the school books some of the time but mainly our own. The research on homework at primary age does not make a good case for doing it and it caused lots of issues at home. When I talked to the school about it, the head of year was keen that we did it, but not their individual class teachers. It seemed to be a policy thing, partly pushed by parental request, more than something that met an educational need.

I resisted until they were secondary (but we moved country at age 7, so in a different system to the UK). They’ve had no problems adapting. My kids are high fliers academically, though. I might have taken a different approach if they didn’t seem to be thriving.

If you missed the school induction, talk to the school, find out why they set it and how they think it will help your DC. But don’t entirely substitute their judgement for yours.

Never. Not until year 5 and 6.

Well I was a teacher at that time so, clearly, my school was different. Not rubbish.

@enchantedsquirrelwood you are perfectly entitled to make a stand against homework but this is poor advice to the OP.

My ds is in reception and he does ten to fifteen minutes of handwriting and reading practice 5 days a week. We aren’t religious about it but usually we find time to slot it in right after breakfast. It’s not arduous to read a little book and complete some phonics games and practice letter formation.

In my experience it is a really good way of encouraging your kids and for them to see that you are actively interested in their progress at school.

My dd did a lot of maths schoolwork on apps at primary school, and also spelling games and reading/word recognition. These games are engaging and the kids are happy to do them (often competitively).

I would definitely have a quick chat with the class teacher and ask for some pointers. You may also find the Induction presentation material is all on the school website so you understand how the school expects parents to engage in the children’s learning.

DC's school set sensible homework in the younger years and it was the sort of thing engaged families would do anyway. Eg. Talking about colour, reading, what's your favourite story, some phonics.

Some of our friends had horror stories about multiple apps, books had to be logged on certain days in the planner, and parents had to sign into a homework platform that's similar to what we used at secondary to find projects to do. I'm supportive of school but would have probably requested a meeting if we were subjected to all that because it's not beneficial for children to have that much homework, especially when so many are in wraparound childcare.

In reception, the only homework mine had was a request for DC to read (or practice sounds is not yet reading) for 10 minutes - skip if your DC is too tired, but try not to skip to often. Plus parents encouraged to read to and share other books with their DC.

Yr 1 added weekly spellings and 1x maths worksheet a week.

And then they'd be random things connected to topics (like: draw, make or find pictures of castles - you can spot the competitive parents a mile off with that sort of thing).

TL:DR - it's worth doing the reading

My son is now in year 2, in England, main stream state school. He gets 'homework' - generally crafty stuff. Occasionally a bit of maths. He gets a phonics reading book sent home... the expectation is he reads it to us. Occasionally we get a maths sheet. That's about it. Homework - volume and type does seem to vary between schools!!

I'm opposed to homework at this age! Poor kid is exhausted by the time he gets home. Both his dad and I read to him every night, then, he reads to us. It's part of 'the bed time routine.' We do get him to read his school book... but also get lots of suitable books out the library to keep it fun and follow his interests. We'll mix fiction and non-fiction.

I do notice some parents are very unrealistic, competitive, pushy, brag, or down right lie about what their kids do and don't do. I also find some are just plain anxious and not able to apply a bit of reality/ critical thinking to the situation. It's just noise to me. Ignore em.

You sound like you are doing a fab job incorporating learning into life. We do similar.

I completely disagree with primary homework, especially the kind that requires a device, passwords, parental supervision. I have 2 DCs at 2 primary schools and need 7 apps for their work, meals, payments etc. It is totally unreasonable.
I have always read with mine, and we have done science experiments, nature trails, times tables sume etc, but it's just out of control!!

I would only do the reading. Homework for primary age students is ridiculous.