AIBU to not do homework with reception age DC?

[SunStorms]

I fear I may be…

I didn’t go through the UK education system and didn’t start learning to read and write until I was 7 so the UK system is alien to me. We never had homework at primary age so I have no idea what is normal here.

I read to my reception age DC every night, we do lots of craft activities, learn about nature, science and history together, they have a great general knowledge, I thought I was doing fine as a parent but…

School send home a reading book, a phonics and maths worksheet every few weeks. We do them. It seemed like a lot to me as I never had homework at 7, let alone 4!

Except it seems the school expected me to be practicing reading/phonics and maths with them using an app regularly. We relocated to the UK just before DC started school so I missed the parents’ induction meeting. We haven’t been doing it until another mum mentioned it on a play date. The school hasn’t said anything but after asking other parents, it seems everyone else has been doing it daily or at least several times a week. I feel awful 😞 My DC is a long way off the end of year goals. I had no idea.

If you are in the UK, how often do you practice writing, reading, phonics, maths etc with your reception age child? Daily, several times a week, weekly, occasionally, never? How long do you spend doing it?

I thought I could make a personalised poll in AIBU but I can’t even get that right 😩

I agree with this. DS gets up to 3 reading books a week (they have to read them twice before they can change them). We don't use the apps much, other than the 'fun' one. I see them as one way to learn but not the only way. They are useful to motivate and support some children and for parents who aren't confident in how to support learning at home. We prefer to support in other ways.

Depends on the school and the child.

We get Maths and English since Year 1. Plus reading. I don't think it's enough. They've learnt very little at school, homework is where the teachers can differentiate more easily in terms of more challenging work.

No idea why anyone has a problem with apps. Mine started school free reading thanks to apps like "teach your monster to read" and have learnt languages to a decent level for their age on apps like Duolingo just because they were interested.

My DD does a maths sheet, phase 3/4/5 phonics practice and reads her daily school book twice, every day. We also do a written piece on the book she's just read to practice handwriting.

Your dd is keeping up. I’m in a class where around a third have not got a clue what is going on. This is the last few years of challenging behaviour from individuals. Evacuations, trashed classrooms. The list goes on. When you meet an 8 year old who can’t read and has zero working memory you do kind of wonder why the parents aren’t doing their bit.

My child struggles with tests. I want to build her confidence so we take up for opportunities given to us by her school.

It depends on the school, the kid and the teacher in my opinion. My eldest needed more input from us, his teacher was quite inexperienced and I am pretty sure he is dyslexic like me. My youngest who is currently in reception has the most outstanding teacher, she is utterly fabulous, and he has picked up the phonics quickly so we don’t do any homework at home, not even the reading really. we aren’t fussed about early year targets, my genuine main concern is that he is settled into school, enjoys going and is confident and happy- then learning will come.

@somptuosité why do you keep asking if I am bilingual? Can you explain why that would make a difference? I understand why it might make a difference to early learning if my DC was bilingual. I am but English is my mother tongue and the language I spoke at home. I have an English accent.

Thanks to everyone for their input.

No 🙄 They send home a reading book and a phonics/maths worksheet every few weeks. We did each one once, like a piece of homework. There was no instruction on the worksheet saying to read the book and practice the phonics/maths skills over and over again, which is what other parents have been doing. There are also online resources to be used ad hoc that I didn’t know about.

Your DC should be reading the book to you. Not you to them. You point at each word and they read or sound it out. 10 mins every day. You might only do one or two pages. A full book could take over a week or so.

They need to learn to recognise the letters and words. You can discuss the picture to see if they understand the story. So point to xx so you can see if they are linking the letter. Eg C A T to a picture of a cat.

The rest is is about habit forming of doing a little something each day.

Don't worry and speak to her teacher after the holiday.

Our school expect:
A reading book. Its short, intended to be at a level not too challenging and doesn't take long
One sheet a week with letter formation practise. It takes 5 mins max

The teacher suggests activities you can do with kids to explore maths concepts. Its play based - games, doing cooking to explore weights and measurements etc. These are easy & fun and I would guess most good parents are doing this stuff anyway.

I disagree with homework in primary school too. Never made my kids do it. They both did some homework in secondary. Not much but whatever was allocated which really was very little. They do enough during the day, they need downtime. If they are struggling with something in particular then I would have like to know so that I could support at home. But random homework for the sake of it. No. There was one teacher who tried to insist on it in primary and I didn’t support them. I told my child it was up to them if they wanted to do it or not. They tended to do it to please the teacher but I really didn’t agree with it.

Oh and I never consider reading to be "homework". Reading is enjoyable unless you push a child to struggle through a book they can't manage. My kids were never reluctant to sit for a few mins to read their book.

I think ask your child's teacher what the expectations are and just do that.

If they haven't spoken to you about this, they are probably quite happy with what you are doing but I can see why you might want to do more if your child isn't on track or the gap with peers is widening.

Other parents might be doing more, or accessing the optional resources on the website, but that doesn't mean that you have to do it too.

Find out the expectations and work out a plan that fits in with your family's lifestyle.

And don't worry or feel guilty - your child is only at the very beginning of this long marathon, and has a lovely supportive mum. In the long run, they will be absolutely fine.