Turning the wifi off

[No1toldmeaboutit]

We have implemented a new rule in the house where the wifi goes off at 12.30am to 6am and what back lash I have had from my 14 and 12 year old children.

We usually go to bed about 11pm and they are usually still up while they are off school which I don’t mind, however, there has been a few days where they have woken us up through the night at god knows what time when we have to be up for work in the morning. It’s not so much them talking that wakes us up (although that does sometimes) it’s hearing them move about the house because they are still awake, opening and closing doors, flushing toilets, turning lights on, going downstairs etc.

my 14 year old has kicked off about this and is begging for it to be left on telling me all their friend are allowed all night.

AIBU to implement this new rule? I think 12.30am is a late enough WIFI curfew for a 12 and 14 year old whilst they are off school and actually quite generous.

does anyone else have a wifi curfew?

Sorry for being stupid but can't they just connect on 5G

This is not true at all!
Also OP will likely be able to set this up remotely not literally turn it off daily.

12.30 is far too late. The fact they are protesting at a 12.30 cut off shows that you are being incredibly weak. They are completely taking the piss and they know it.

I wish I'd done that!

My DCs are both young adults and my DD still games overnight...

Really not sure what it is with GenZ and overnight gaming, it's odd and bad for their health...

😮 Good lord I’m out of the loop-had no idea this was a thing- on devices all night??
My kids are grown now (30s) but if they were still teenagers it would be 10pm thanks very much. Everyone needs to bloody sleep properly. You need to instill good sleep hygiene habits.

12:30am?? That seems really late, particularly for the 12 year old. My eldest is 12.5 and during term time he goes up to bed between 8:30 and 9pm (depending on what sports training he’s had on that evening and when he gets back), and reads for 1/2 an hour before lights off. He gets up at 6:30am for school. During the holidays he tends to stay up until somewhere between 9 and 10pm, again depending on what training he’s doing the next day or if he has a competition or we’re just getting up to go on a day out somewhere. If we haven’t got anything on he might stay in bed til 8am, but if we’re doing something that means an early-ish start he will get up at 7/7:30am.

However the WiFi thing - we never switch our Wifi off, but the rule is no phones after 8pm anyway and that is the same for holiday time too. He only goes on the Xbox occasionally anyway and never late into the evening so that’s not an issue and he doesn’t want or have a tablet or laptop as he spends most of his free time outside playing football or just scuffing about outside with friends or his brothers. He has younger siblings though so understands that the house needs to be quietening down in the evenings. I’m surprised your teens have the energy to get up and get out and enjoy themselves in the holidays when they are staying up so late and with (presumably unsupervised) access to the internet / gaming. Looking at screens too close to sleep (and not getting enough sleep or exercise) is so bad for growing brains and mental health. Personally I would be limiting their access to devices and internet (and making them go to bed earlier) a lot more than you are and whinging from them would only make me be stricter 😂

Stick to your guns, short term pain for long term gain. All the evidence points to how damaging social media and unsolicited access to the internet is to kids. They are likening it to opium. There is a big call from many different bodies to even ban smart phones for under 16’s

Stick to your guns OP. It is not healthy to be up on the internet/gaming all night, whether their friends do it or not. Obviously the golden oldie response of 'and if all your friends jumped off a cliff, you would too?'is the go to answer

My DS16 does not stay up after 12 in the holidays and there would be consequences if he was disturbing us with noise. I think you need to toughen up with 12 and 14 year olds.

Absolutely turn it off. Really bad for developing brains not to have enough sleep. Also at that age they will be overtired and say stupid stuff at night and then be overwhelmed by reaction as they are tired in the day. Although engineers have told me not to turn it off at night our wi-fi works fine. Tell them all the drama happens at night because their friends are overtired and they will be more respected if they don't get involved

We never switch our wifi off but mine don’t play any iPad/PlayStation after dinner as a general rule - exceptions are fine obviously but it’s not the norm and they just take it as standard now. Phones have a parental controlled sleep mode from 9pm-7am. My own phone has it from about 10pm I think so no apps sound through the night. I can’t see how anyone that age needs to be playing, school holidays or otherwise, past about 9pm. They need to find something else to do if they don’t want to sleep.

You pay the bill you turn it off when you want. Tell them they can have a say when they start contributing. If they kick off it goes off earlier the next night.

He’s on his PlayStation usually playing with his friends. On a school night he has to be off at 9pm and then lights out at 10pm when I take his phone off him.

the 14 year old has generally been good at coming off her devices and was trusted but seems she can’t be anymore so she needs to be told

My mum put internet restrictions on my internet from 14-21 I ended up just moving out we were arguing too much much better relationship with a bit of distance 😂.... That said I bought a WiFi dongle and used that so I could stay online 😂😂

100% agree.

We have a separate kids wifi attached to our main wifi (no extra cost you simply log into the main hub/router and set up a guest network) school holidays is midnight for the teenagers 13 and 15. Term time it's 11pm.
If they don't wake for school on time or do their chores then it's reduced by 1hr.
Don't cave in stick to what you've deemed reasonable even if it was 10pm it's your rules.

I notice a lot of posters are telling OP what she should do - not what they actually do - I suspect making these rules is easier said than done.

my mam did this when we were younger and the only thing I would say about doing this is that we had to have the engineers out too look at wifi as it was getting slower and they said when you turn the wifi off , the router picks it up as a break in the system and has to fight against it when you turn it back it on as if you turning it off will disrupt the speed and connection and cause it to lag over time

Absolutely, you're not being unreasonable. Setting a WiFi curfew at 12:30 AM, especially for a 12 and 14-year-old during school breaks, seems quite reasonable and, indeed, generous.

In my own experience, we've taken a slightly tech-savvy approach to managing our kids' internet usage. Working in IT, I had the advantage of utilising business-grade WiFi equipment, enabling us to set up a separate network exclusively for our children. This allowed us to not only control the network's availability—turning it off around 10pm in the week, but also to manage access to specific websites. For instance, we restricted platforms like YouTube during the evening, ensuring that the internet could only be used for homework and other productive activities during set times.

The initial reaction from the kids was less than thrilled, understandably. It's a change from what they were used to, and adjusting to it took some time. However, implementing these controls was about more than just limiting internet access; it was about encouraging healthier habits and ensuring they get the rest they need, especially on school nights.

For those considering similar measures, I recommend looking into solutions like Cisco's Meraki Go. It's designed for small businesses, but it's incredibly user-friendly and offers extensive control over your network directly from your mobile device. This flexibility can be a game-changer for parents looking to manage their home internet use effectively.

I believe as this generation grows up, with firsthand experience of the impacts of unrestricted internet access, they'll likely advocate for more sophisticated parental controls. They'll understand the importance of these measures, not just from a standpoint of restriction, but for fostering a healthier, more balanced approach to technology use.

I think loads of posters have said what they do. I have a twelve and a half year old and two ten year olds. Lights off are at 9 pm in the holidays. They're allowed to watch a bit of tv in the evening before bed (around 45 minutes unless it's a family movie night or something) and then they read/listen to audible. Devices are locked down in the evening (the twins don't have a device and I keep the oldest's phone. He has a laptop but it's locked). In the day they very rarely use screens. They are creative and play and make things and do Lego and read. There's so much in the media about the dangers of screens for this age group --children need parenting because most, left to their own devices, will choose the screen.

What a load of rubbish!

This is insane! We have a no screens in bedrooms after 8.30pm rule and my eldest is 13. Reading, drawing, board games etc all ok after this in the holidays. My experience is children get so addicted to screens and gaming it completely impacts their mood, energy and engagement with the family. You also need to think about your own wellbeing, you need sleep and rest as much as your children do so can’t have people making lots of noise at night. This isn’t working for anyone.

I placed restrictions when mine were that age, they just had the inability to self regulate. I don’t anymore as I have one at uni and one doing A levels. They do have to learn some self regulation at some point though.

I posted earlier saying that a BT engineer told my parents the same thing when they did this to me and my bro years ago

At 12 and 14 it’s tough; those are the house rules and sorry when parents have work the next day no you’re not sitting up talking loudly on games or phone calls all night long. They can do that when they have their own place and no-one to disturb