Parent and child spaces should be for those with children 5 and under

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Parent-child parking spaces at supermarkets should be reserved primarily for those with children aged 5 and under, aside from older children with special needs (although a blue badge might be more appropriate where they meet the criteria, in these cases).

I was alone with my 4 month old today, the trolleys with the baby seats are kept next to these spaces. The spaces which have the easiest access to the trolleys had all been taken with the last taken by someone just before me, I reversed into a space around the corner and the driver was shaking their head at me, presumedly because their space only had extra room on one side and my space came up to them (see picture). I was surprised to then see them get out with a child of about 13. I saw multiple other people using these spaces with children looking like teenagers. I was able to get a space which still had fairly easy access to the trolleys, albeit by needing to walk on the road and inbetween the other cars, multiple people had parked in the spaces with the easiest access with much older children. I was lucky to get a space at all, had I not I would have had to walk across the busy carpark holding my baby.

YANBU- Just because someone has a child under 16 doesn’t mean they should take up these spaces, they should save them for people who need them the most.

YABU- first come first served, who cares if someone with a baby is having to traipse across a busy car park holding a baby to get to the baby trolleys.

If they are a courtesy then surely it's courteous to not use them if you don't have to

If they're disabled they should have a blue badge, if they have one of the invisible disabilities then I'd be surprised if they were driving and walking around a shop unaided and unattended, someone blind for instance would not be driving a car would they. You can keep pushing that all you like but guaranteed the vast majority of people using those spaces when they shouldn't be are being lazy and have no physical need to use them beyond laziness, I've even seen mums use the spaces with empty car seats which for the record I also don't agree with. Based on the responses I've had when asking someone it screams of guilt, "I can park where I want" etc. if someone looked disabled, mobility issues, cane that sort of thing then I would obviously not challenge.
Interestingly one of my work friends is disabled and only just had a bb given to her, she said she would never dream of using a p&c space if bb were all taken and didn't during the years of not having one. I did say she's fully entitled to but she said it was in her BB rule book, I didn't realise that was a rule but there we go and also don't agree that it should be a rule, given they're allowed on double yellows seems weird to say can't use P&C. Sure I'll get ripped apart for this, but to clarify this is not my opinion but an anecdote I've been told.

I’m glad you wouldn’t say it in real life because that would make you sound like an arrogant, unknowledgable prat.

Neurodivergeance isn’t the only factor that can make a child’s behaviour challenging; trauma, social and emotional delay, learning disabilities, lack of sleep, level of development, moment of spontaneity, worry, low mood, illness…. I could go on and on. We can’t divide children up onto two categories NT and ND. Life is so much more nuanced than that.

And even if a difficulty keeping children safe and under control in a car park IS down to poor parenting (or, god forbid, a parent just having an off day and finding things rather challenging - I postition I guess you have never found yourself in?!) then surely that family deserve to park where they feel safest to ensure the safety of those children?

I’ve noticed on mumsnet that there seems to be no acceptance of “NT” children being challenging. (Who decides they are anyway, just because they don’t have a diagnosis….)

FFS there are hidden disabilities beyond blindness and it's not for you to judge whether supermarkets are appropriate places for people with hidden disabilities.

Ever thought of a career as a traffic warden? Unleash that passion 😂

This

They are for parents who need them. My son is adhd and autistic and when he was little, a runner. Parking nearer the shop allowed me to negotiate the short distance I had to keep him safe. Blue badges for autism and other hidden disabilities are a new thing and weren’t available when he was small, and even now they take time to apply for and get awarded. So whilst I understand the need to have wider spaces to get a baby out of a car seat? You have to remember children should be in a car seat to between the ages of 10-12 depending on their height/weight. A child like mine that could get out of his car seat and run the second the door was opened, having a space near the path or the shop entrance made it safe for him.
Hes now almost 15, and still a runner, but I can now at least give him
instructions that he will almost always follow and now knows to not run in the road

I wouldn't call it a passion 😂 but watching a mum drag her multiple kids across a car park when a young healthy looking guy skips a few steps from a p&c car parking space does piss me off.
I know there's more than blindness, it's called an example..

Of course your mother can park in them. Anyone with a disabled badge gets priority over anyone else. And this kind of comment definitely illustrates my point that there is a generation of parents who now feel that their needs are greater than an old person with mobility needs that entitle them to a blue badge.

YANBU, I have a baby and a toddler and it’s incredibly hard to get them both out of a small space. With supermarkets though I park as close to the trolleys as I can get, leave the kids in the car for a few seconds while I grab one and then bring it to the car to pop them in, it makes life much easier!

@Flopsy145 you are making assumptions. You don't know anything about the circumstances of the young health LOOKING guy. That's the whole point. None of your business whatsoever.

They do those in store too. I think you are posting from a place of privilege and you should really examine that.

Is it not privileged to be able to keep and run a car?

Likely just being lazy though.
At the end of the day there will be people in both camps, in fact I've not met anyone in real life when this topic has come up who haven't agreed with me. There will also be people who disagree, including those that probably use those spaces out of laziness, and I honestly don't mind. People can have different opinions, life goes on. I don't need to convince anyone to my side, and nor do you need to convince people to yours.

As I said earlier, I need it to get to my job. If I didn’t have a car, I’d need to quit my job. I need to be in three towns within 45 minutes.

People should be nice and self aware enough to know whether they shall use it or not. They know the need of their child, they know if they have an infant or toddler and they know if their child is with special needs. So they should actually use it that way. Where is the humanity and compassion?
I don't have a car, but when I was with my friend in hers, we used it. I have a 2 year old and it is not possible to get him out and in to his car seat if I don't have enough space, so...

I agree, well until they don't need help getting in and out of their car seats anyway. I don't use parent and child spaces anymore now that my youngest is 9, I would be too embarrassed to take a space from someone with babies and toddlers!

Did you read @Wills post? How do you think you would make them feel if you accosted them challenging why they were parking where they were? Maybe you should think about that kind of thing before acting next time?

How does that stop you being privileged?

Exactly!

I have a wide car and a adhd/asd/dyspraxic child, who looks like any normal 9 year old but struggles to get carefully in and out but not enough to qualify for a blue badge.

But you do need to consider the impact of you commenting to people in real life.

before now when people have took it upon themselves to question me parking in the spaces with DS we have had to turn around and go home because that one interaction has sent his anxiety too high to be able to carry on with the trip.

when your living with disability there is often a very fine line between coping and not. Someone like you can push someone easily over that line.

Can I have a “just had surgery” space please, I have to open the car door fully open to leverage myself out, it’s really hard.

How is it relevant to using a parking space? Presumably everyone in the car park is “privileged” enough to have a car, however many are not privileged enough to be able to afford online deliveries as well as running their car, and they simply cannot choose to give up their car, which would necessitate also giving up their job, and thus they would be shopping at the food bank and not the supermarket.

Therefore your point is completely irrelevant, isn’t it?

Could you get a delivery just for the duration of your recovery, why suffer ?

@Flopsy145 my DM had a hidden disability and hated parking in a parent and child bay with her blue badge when there were no disabled spaces. However, she physically could not walk the distance to the door of the supermarket unaided. If someone like you approached her challenging her parking and I had been there, I am pretty sure they would have regretted it.