To not be excited about light nights and summer?

[hermithead]

I keep seeing posts on SM about how the light nights are here, and the better weather.

I know this is obviously preferred by a lot of people.

Personally, I'm feeling a little like I'll need to force myself to embrace that.

I've been enjoying going out a walk in the dark, knowing I'll bump into few people and that I can hide under heavy coat and hat.

It's more acceptable to stay home for days on end in the winter, and I'm all for that.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy it when I do get out and socialise, etc, but at the moment I'm feeling like it's something I'll need to really gear up to.

Am I weird? Or are there others like me?

Well I think you're weird but there are a lot of you on MN. They will all pop up as soon as the temperature is over about 23c, complaining that they are melting. Or when people who really struggle with the increasing darkness start posting in October, will be on here wittering on about snuggling on the sofa under a blankie and with hot choccie and being cosy.

You don't have to go out when the nights are lighter - you just have the option to do so if you wish. And if you don't want to go out, or would prefer to wait until dusk, then do that.

Just remember how you - and a lot of other MN posters - are feeling now, is how many other people feel at the end of October when they are facing months of cold and dark. So lay off the "isn't November wonderful, cold and wet and dark".

I can't understand why. I hate winter. I waited months for brighter days. I love it.

I’m with the OP on this one. We live in a warm and relatively dry part of the UK and I dread the cloying summer humidity. I just can’t sleep. My ankles turn into cankles. Sometimes my work laptop temporarily shuts down due to the uncivilised temps in the house. I wish I could opt out like that. Everything is an effort and I feel like I can’t breathe. What enrages me further are weather reports conveyed with constant positivity, ‘Good news, everyone! Today we’re going to see 40 degrees and the nights are going to be all warm and toasty!’ Do these people realise that some of us are hormonal, slightly fat women dreaming of fresh air? Not everyone is an elderly lizard-person who has time to lounge about with a prosecco!

I was looking forward to some crisp, bright winter days - the ones where frost on trees and shrubs look really pretty. Feels like I’ve been denied this. The winter just gone was mild, wet, with weirdly warm nights.

Am I weird? Or are there others like me?
Yes and yes.

I'm not in the UK, it was daytime when I wrote my post.

I think also that what the summer-haters don't get is that summer is not guaranteed. Here in central Scotland, we had a couple of warm weeks last June, and the rest of July and August was a washout. So yes, the nights were light but it was also pouring and windy. July in England last year was also "very cool, dull and wet" in England according to the Met Office.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-66657562

What IS guaranteed is that winter is going to be cold and dark. People like to bang on about crisp winter mornings and crunching through leaves but that's a rare reality, most often it's rain and fog and mud. So the winter lovers who just want to stay at home and "fester under a blanket" get that guaranteed every year, usually from about the start of September through to the end of March. People who embrace summer don't have any guarantees living in the UK, we might get a summer, we might just get slightly warmer rain/wind.

Well said @Misthios .

There is stuff to enjoy about every season, that is why I like living in a country with defined seasons. However what is this absolute bullshit about winter being "cosy"? It is a relentless, miserable slog of trying to stay warm and/or dry.

I’m looking forward to some social meet ups in beer gardens, but apart from that there’s fuck all that’s positive about the summer compared to the other seasons.

Also liking winter is a modern first world privilege. Animals (including humans) are hard wired to look forward to Spring due to the the reappearance of warmth, light and more plentiful food.

I'm like this. I hate it when it gets too hot.

I like breezy, light and sunny spring days but not summer.

Don't mind dark nights or mornings either.

Well said @Misthios Last summer really wasn't pleasant where I am (South Warks), no nice stretches of even warm, never mind hot, weather, just the odd day.

ETA, but YANBU to have a preference OP. As pp have said there are lots of people who dislike spring & summer on mn.

I’m more of an autumn/winter person but I’m enjoying finishing work while it’s still daylight and I like sun (not that we’re getting much).

What I’m dreading most is the heat - anything over 22 degrees is absolute torture for me. I have severe hayfever and was diagnosed with eczema last October so not looking forward to how that pans out over the summer.

I'm the same as you @hermithead! My heart always sinks when the clocks change in March. I prefer the cosiness of dark nights and mornings.

I'd rather sit out in the garden on a warm spring/summer evening with a glass of wine than sit huddled under a blanket with a MN 'hot choc'

Well, yes, but not all of us have gardens. Try being in a heavily-insulated block of flats on a warm summer’s evening. If I had a garden I’d no doubt enjoy summer a lot more.

I don’t finish work until 6.30 pm some days so I’m looking forward to coming home in daylight from now on until end of September- feels like you actually have time to do more than just work.

It has felt a long winter with so much rain and flooding in my area. Hasn’t been nice bright winter days but endless grey and little sun.

I’ll be honest OP, your reasons sound rooted in some MH or self esteem or other issue, and since whatever the clocks do we cannot change the rising and setting of the sun , so just as people with winter SAD seek help to address it , if you are struggling I hope you can find d some support.

I'm looking forward to not driving home in the dark and actually seeing some daylight on the days I'm in the office, I leave the house when it's dark, I dont even see the sunrise, then spend all day sat in an office with no natural light, only to sit on a motorway in the dark on the way home.

It also means I can do more with my evenings, instead of vegging on the sofa I can go out for a bike ride. The flowers and plants come to life, the bees and butterflies appear.

Winter days are not cosy, they're miserable and gloomy and mostly consist of rain. I can't remember the last cold sunny day we actually had.

Could not agree more.

I don't actually like really hot weather but I love the light and the sun (if it's not too hot). I do quite like crisp winter days but, honestly, how many of those do we get? We just get loads of rain and wind and the sky is gray and miserable.

Last summer was pretty awful. I bought quite a few summer dresses in 2022 as I always loved in jeans and last year I think I wore a dress three times and one of those times I was to chilly even with a cardigan over it so had to go home and change.

People that like winter are lucky really because we have wintery weather for so much of the year

YABU. I hate it when people try and make out like the dark days in winter are fun, when it's actually their own mental health issues.

I have a friend just like you. Hates summer because it means daylight and socialising. All she does until the end of October is complain. When she speaks to people who have diagnosed seasonal depression she says it's just an excuse to be miserable. Meanwhile she hides in bed ordering takeaways and watching the same films a million and one times. She refuses to get help for her anxiety and will spend all of summer near tears because she can't hide.

@Icantbedoingwithit

thats a very strong reaction to it, do you know why?

I have a friend who hates it too, loves winter & early dark nights, I know for him it's about feeling safe at home, doors, curtains shut, closing off the outside world.

YABU. I hate it when people try and make out like the dark days in winter are fun, when it's actually their own mental health issues.
That's not the case for all of us. I'm happy to be out socialising but I'm happy to do that in winter too. I just don't like it being too hot (that's anything over about 23 for me) and I hate it being light after about 8pm max. Nothing to do with wanting to hide away, I just find it irritating and find darkness more relaxing. That's whether I'm at home or not!

I would do best on the equator having equal length day and night year round.

And sun cream. Bloody sun cream. I would far rather keep track of 10 pairs of gloves and woolly hats than have to spend one more day buying sun cream, fighting with DC to get it on, worrying that they won't use their roll-on one at school and whether the expensive all day stuff actually lasts. And it getting everywhere.

I’m not a fan of light evenings generally. Sometimes I will sit out with a glass of wine, if it isn’t too hot (in London so evenings don’t really cool down). Otherwise I’m in the house and have either blackout blinds or heavy curtains shut at every window, with lamps on. This “tricks” my mind that it’s dark outside and then I feel relaxed. I also have portable air con in my bedroom, which helps a lot with sleeping or I just go there when the heat gets too much.

Ditto in the mornings it’s dark until I open everything up, so it’s within my control. I also got one of those big paddling pools, I think it’s 2m x 1.5m and me and DD spend ages in there on hot days. We have some decent shade in the garden so we’re not directly under the sun. That really helps to maintain a cooler body temperature.

So I have turned from a total summer hater to finding the positives in it and having strategies for the negatives. But I do feel bad for people who live in flats, many of which seem to be those new builds that get ridiculously hot. I would struggle a lot more without a garden.