about colleagues always going on about me getting pregnant ….. at age 48?

[headache]

Every bloody week there’s some comment about me getting pregnant or being pregnant. This week it was about DH and I going away on holiday by ourselves for the first time in 20 years “oh I bet you come back pregnant!” said a colleague. To which I replied very very unlikely at my age (almost 49). “Oh you never know”.

Last week I said I had a dodgy stomach, apparently that was me being pregnant too FFS. I’m peri menopausal and having a bloody hard time over it, I’ve had 4 DC the youngest of which is 14, I have shown no interest in having a baby (DH had a vasectomy after no4 was born) despite all this I keep getting told I’m flaming pregnant. Do you think they will stop when I’m 55?

They sound really weird. You've had four children already! I'd have to ask why they keep on talking about it.

That’s really odd. What age are they?

Just say "I'd be on the front cover of the Birmingham Bugle!"
Or wherever you're from.

@headache they sound a bit obsessive, I can see why you don’t like it. It’s a wonder in today’s world how they see this as okay. I hope they do stop soon; maybe you have to shock them into it, if they’re men start talking about your ovaries, that soon shuts them up! Good luck.

Try saying "You do realise I'm in perimenopause, right?" and watch them squirm.

Although... is one of them a similar age to you and hoping to conceive, maybe? Perhaps this isn't entirely about you, maybe others are trying to buoy her up indirectly.

Have you tried saying 'oh my god no I couldn't start all that again, can't think of anything worse'?

In fairness, when I went to have my coil replaced (I’m 47) the practice nurse was really clear I can still get pregnant. And it happened to someone I know age 48 unexpectedly.

But still it is utterly inappropriate for your colleagues to be making jokes about this. I would say, “I’ve got 4 kids and a thick skin, so I can take the jokes but making jokes about pregnancy is never funny - you’ve no idea who you might hurt by mistake.”

Im thinking of the many women I know who struggle with infertility and miscarriage, I would never ever make an offhand remark to anyone, male or female, about pregnancy. It’s a minefield.

Why would they stop when you reach 55?

Strange behaviour

I would tell them to shut up or you'll go to HR

'Well thank fuck abortion exists then eh?'

"mind your own fucking uterus. And your own business" usually works

Your colleagues are weird and tedious and I'd probably try to find a way to tell them.

I feel for you it’s very bloody annoying when people think they can comment on this. If I wasn’t drinking at a family event my sister would always goad and say oh do you have something to tell us, or if I told a neighbour child was cute, my brother told me I was broody. I remember once even taking a pregnancy test because my sister was eyeing up my belly asking if I was still on the pill. It’s just weird behaviour and there are so many other things in the world to talk about .

The one who made the remark today is in her 50s, I have said don’t be so bloody stupid I’m almost 50 before “oh people have had babies at your age” I just found it totally bizarre to say that to someone when you find out they are going on holiday with just their DH! That would be your first thought!

Also very insensitive as there’s a woman at work who we all know has had failed IVF attempts and has resigned her self to be childless 🙁

It sounds like targeted bullying, they know you react to these comments so they keep making them. They've no interest in whether or not you're pregnant they're after the rise.

Yeah it’s a bit odd but not a reason to be REALLY PISSED OFF or anything. Slightly bemusing but hardly insulting or nasty.

this is SO weird.

Which bit?

but imagine if OP was younger, and struggling with fertility or miscarriage? or if there is another colleague who is receiving these comments. OP it's totally inappropriate, I'd make a formal complaint. never acceptable to common on someone's fertility at work, it's not a joke.

"Also very insensitive as there’s a woman at work who we all know has had failed IVF attempts and has resigned her self to be childless 🙁"
Exactly my point.

I'd end up telling her to fuck off.
She's being very intrusive and it's absolutely none of her business!!

The bit where people make weekly comments about the 48-year-old OP being pregnant? I would have said "Have a nice holiday. Lucky you."