Should I bin my friend's art?

[Joyjazz]

My friend painted me a picture. The sentiment was lovely but I really hate it. It's not my taste and not in keeping with my house. I keep it behind the TV and hang it whenever she comes to visit so I don't hurt her feelings as she is really proud of this piece and spent many weeks making it. I'm moving to a new house and I don't want to be carrying things that I don't like or want to my new home. I want to take the frame and bin the actual painting. She's a good friend and she is likely to visit and possibly ask where the art is.

AIBU to put the painting in the bin?

Isn't that from Friends, something Phoebe had?

Ah! Just realised the joke, that the pic wasn't from the OP!!

No. Do not bin it!

honesty (or some version of this) might be best. How about saying that you really want a fresh start in your new home and that it doesn’t suit your design vision?

this may not work for you, but that would be my “excuse” (well, the truth in my case):

I personally prefer to hang up very little art / decorations etc.

Probably because I grew up surrounded by a lot (or too much imo) of it.

And I have adhd, which probably plays a role as well.

I like / need a calm, open and light room. Not too much visual stimulation.

could you talk about intentionally creating a low stimulus environment and tell her that you therefore would prefer to return the piece (or put it into storage)?

And that she please shouldn’t make you an other one?

That obviously won’t work if you’re set on a maximalist aesthetic…

No that's horribly unkind. Just put it in the loft and say you haven't found the right place for it yet. But is there really no spare room it could go in?

MIL is an amateur painter and is actually pretty good, has had exhibitions and stuff BUT its just not my style. She painted a huge picture of a photo of something from our Honeymoon which was a nice gesture but I hate it.
Its in DHs office upstairs where it doenst bother me.
I would just say to your friend that its such a shame it just doesnt fit with your new decor if thers nowhere you can hang it where you dont have to look at it

I think I'd have to hide it, and bring it out when she visits. But then I’d worry about her popping in unexpectedly!

But I agree with pps, people shouldn’t inflict their art on friends! Taste is such a personal thing.

For a similar reason I’m glad nobody ever sends me handmade birthday or Christmas cards (except for the Gdcs, of course, that’s different). I’d feel obliged to keep them - just more stuff to find room for.

What if the friend calls round unexpectedly and the OP doesn’t have time to do this?

Personally I would not take it to the new house.
If my friend asked where it was, I would say that it didn't make the cut and although I loved that she gave it to me, it wasn't to my taste - good friends should be able to take this kind of feedback, particularly if it's done in a kind way. You loved that she gave it to you but you don't love 'it'
Also gives her a clear signal not to give you her crafty crap again. I wouldn't have the bandwith to keep putting up her painting and then taking it down again

My friend did a painting for me. I didn't particularly like it but got it framed and hung it in my bedroom which she doesn't really go into. When she isn't around I take it down, place it behind my headboard and hang up the picture i do like . If i think there is a possibility she might come around i whip it out. She is a bit sensitive so these are the lengths I go to. To deter any further possibility of more pictures of the same vain I have told her my home decorating vibe is minimalist scandi ( which isn't technically true but is along scandi theme). I have also said that I am getting to a point in my life where I have enough and am looking to get rid of things rather than accumulate more.

If yiur friend is one of those people who feels they still need to give, emphasise how much you would love some plants for your home.

What’s the other sitcom?

some people hang art inside their dull cupboards. You might have a fright everytime you open it. Say it gave you nightmares but you didn’t want to get rid of it so it’s hanging in your cupboard

I think it happened in Frasier too. Or maybe I'm thinking of the time he got done by an art fraudster.

Yeah... don't bin it. Does anyone you know like it so you can gift it? Or just donate to oxfam or smth
As for her, you can always say it got lost in the moving process along with some other precious items. Just an unlucky batch 🤷🏼‍♀️

Let me get this straight - you're seriously considering throwing out the painting but keeping the frame?! You got a Rembrandt up in the attic that would go nicely with it?

Legally, your exposure to liability from destroying the painting is low (and can be reduced to zero by ensuring that, if you do destroy it, you do so privately and do not post a video of the act of destruction online).

So it's basically down to your own ethics.

What would happen if you tried to give the painting back? Because if you really can't stand it, but feel guilty about sticking it through a shredder, that is an option. Say that you really appreciate the work that's gone into it, but it doesn't fit with the aesthetic you're trying to create.

If you can't face that then your choice is to keep the painting and hang it whenever your friend visits; pray to your preferred deity that the removal team will damage the painting during the move; or slip said removal team a tenner and make sure it happens.

I am astonished by people here. They didn’t notice that it was not the OP that posted the picture. And then have ignored the multiple explanations!

I’m also reminded of the Reginald Perrin series. Where after losing his job he opened a shop selling among other things the dreadful paintings of his dentist and osteopath and his son in law’s terrible home made wine, and ending up with a huge national chain with the USP “gifts for people you don’t like”.

I am in a similar situation..... I just put it in a cupboard out of sight and take it out when they visit. I find buying or gifting art to somebody else really odd and a bit inconsiderate anyway. Art is such a subjective and personal thing, so choosing a piece is usually a well considered process based on what appeals to us specifically. Second guessing what a friend or family member would like to hang on their wall is presumptuous.

Yes, but the craft item or painting is only going to make anyone happy if it’s something they really wanted in the first place. Or else you know absolutely 100% that they’d really like it.
Otherwise it’ll be a case of an internal, ‘Oh, shit…’ - while glueing a plastic smile on.

Just seen the painting, it's ghastly at best and creepy at worst. Who on earth would want it hanging on any wall in their home??

The Big Bang Theory.

You haven't seen the painting, it was a joke by another poster.

I agree. I've only given them to those who want it. They're happy looking at them. The finished art is definitely not for my benefit. I do enjoy painting though it's relaxing. I haven't done any for ages.

I am aware it's a joke, but still ask who would hang it in their home?

The fictional characters on the TV show that it featured in as a plotline for exactly that.