Lord above some people are just... unbelievable!

[DuIcieDomum]

There's an Apache MK1 final flypast today [yawn] which DP and DS (autistic, this comes under one of his special interests) have been banging on about for days. They made flasks of cocoa and set up deckchairs in one of our fields (we live on a farm) to sit and watch it. Anyway it was delayed by 45 mins so they came in to eat lunch and then went back out...to find two men sitting on the deckchairs eating sandwiches waiting for the flypast . There was a third man with a dog with them, who actually asked DP to put our dog on a lead because his dog is nervous of other dogs!!

Now, this was in our field which is private land. The field is visible from a footpath but the footpath just goes past the gate and doesn't enter the field. They just saw our deckchairs and though it looked like a nice place to go and sit.

DP said sorry but no, they'd have to take the dog out of the field if it wasn't ok with other dogs, and that he and DS wanted their deckchairs back. A bit of harrumphing and the men left but... WTF?!?

While that's absolutely lovely and I totally wish I could feel like that, from a safety point of view on a remote site I'd like noone unknown to come anywhere near me.

Yes if some people want to simply sit quietly. But some becomes many. Quietly is not a standard measure. Grass? That takes upkeep. It doesn't remain nice when trampled and overly used. Do you expect said benign travellers to respect your field? Because they won't . They'll litter. Let and leave their dog shit. They'll tell their friends. Who'll do the same.

Like you I will never ever own anymore than a sense of my own self.although I do own a decent toastie machine I'm particularly fond of (and do not allow use of to all and sundry who need a decent toastie).

However in regard to land (and toastie machines) I respect that with ownership comes maintenance and cost. With entitlement comes neither. If you wouldn't let random strangers use what you own with gay abandon, why should anyone else? Land takes work and upkeep. And people are awful.

It’s easy to think you’d be fine with people roaming over land you don’t actually own and don’t actually have to spend money and effort keeping it in a useable state.

When you’re actually responsible for maintaining it, for turning a profit from it in some way, suddenly it’s a lot less appealing to constantly be dealing with the many ways the public fuck things up.

Whether that’s litter - which can kill livestock, even if it’s not obviously dangerous like broken glass, just plastic - or dog attacks on your animals, or dog shit in your crops.

Livestock straying because someone’s left the gate open. Livestock dying because someone’s fed them something stupid. Hay crops not growing in areas of constant footfall because “it’s just grass”.

Fruit / veg / flower crops picked for their own consumption, fencing damaged, drones harassing animals, burned out cars left on the land, cigarette ends dropped, actual deliberate arson…

If the public could behave themselves and act responsibly, farmers would be a lot less inclined to be territorial about their land.

I love in a terrace on a boring street and I've had this!

And they got cross when I asked them to move!

🤯

Live 🤦

People are such idiots. I hope your husband pointed out that they could have killed your horses, or at the least made them extremely unwell.

This will show how old I am, when I was a child (lived in the countryside for part of my childhood ) one of the things we used to do for fun was to touch the electric fences and wait for the jolt, or time it so we’d grab the fence and let go before the jolt came! Modern kids with their screens don’t know what they’re missing…

My favourite is adding a dash of either whiskey or brandy to a mug of cocoa.

It's not to everyone's taste, but I enjoy it.

Oh yes, another thing I like is having a mug of hot milk with a bit of Bailey's.

It's ok, they've gone now.

We had a guy trespass today, accidentally caught him whilst jet washing moss off the roof. He got wet.oops!

^

🥴😄

I can't have this any more but I used to sometimes make a cup of hot milky sweet tea and add brandy (otherwise just drank tea with milk but no sugar), and it would be lovely in winter, and made a good Christmas morning drink. It was nice to sip outside or on a balcony while gazing at snow.

I think cocoa vs hot chocolate is regional. I use the terms interchangeably.

I once had a bride and a groom have a photoshoot in my garden. I don't live in a beautiful rural location, just a small front garden in a suburban street. When they got their photo's back they would've seen my children peering out the windows at them.

We have a large field surrounding our old farmhouse. One afternoon I found two men had pitched up a tent there. We asked them to leave and after quite a bit of grumbling they did.

@WrenNatsworthy
"This is AIBU. I think you were quick to get cross and offended when you could have been friendly, so YWBU."

This a silly opinion because the OP wasn't even there. It was her husband and son who encountered the CFs.

This goes beyond rude and it’s really bloody strange..why on earth would you see someone else’s deck chairs & think it was ok to sit in them?? The private land thing- ok you could be forgiven for not realising it was private (unless there’s a huge sign & a fence though) but the deck chairs….thats just really really weird. I can only think they aren’t all there in the heads seriously!!

The other issue we have now with the footpath crossing our land is that the local authority have been very clear in saying that they have no intention of carrying out footpath resurfacing and would do this “every ten to fifteen years, if ever”.

The problem we find is that the general public expect nicely surfaced footpaths (a la National Trust) and don’t like getting their feet muddy on …well, muddy countryside footpaths.
We’ve previously funded resurfacing work out of our own pocket as a community minded gesture, but no longer! The entitlement of the general public plus constant litter and leaving of dog poo has really stripped away any community spirit. Especially as said locals are all too quick to post on Facebook about the state of the footpath - little realising that our responsibility is to keep the footpath clear and not obstructed (it is)but that it is the responsibility of the local authority for resurfacing work - which runs into thousands of pounds for materials and labour.

I can’t believe the entitlement of some people 😱 it’s a wonder farmers don’t shoot more entitled people ruining their land!

You can make a much better hot chocolate with cocoa, sugar and milk than any powdered hot chocolate you can buy in the supermarket, and there are no nasty additives.

That's a really nice sentiment, but would you go and sit in the front garden of someone that you didn't know?

It's pretty audacious. You don't go onto other people's land and sit on their furniture. And obviously, not everyone feels as generously as you do about allowing use of their private possessions to strangers.

There were people camping in a tent in my village last week, it's farm land (not mine) It did make me laugh. It wasn't even stealthy, it was a bright red tent, in the middle of a field 😂 life is too short to get worked up about it, I just drank my tea and pondered.

Covid was awful though, I had people park on my private land, get out deckchairs and a BBQ (heatwave) and sit topless!! I did point out they were crushing the land drains and needed to move as the drains prevented flooding. I got informed it was a heatwave and no chance of flooding. What is wrong with people?

The OP is a farmer. The field is a business asset and part of her livelihood. She and her partner have worked for this land - this working land that needs to earn its keep. It’s not just an extra large garden in the country that they got through sheer luck! Why should they share their “massive good fortune”?

People are mad.

Our neighbour had to remove a bench from their front garden because people took to sitting on it to watch their children in the park opposite. Inside the gate and very obviously in someone’s garden. I only found out when speaking to them about our plans for the garden (not long moved) and mentioned getting a bench as the front is a wee sun trap so will be lovely in summer

So much nicer than hot chocolate.

Slightly off topic, but MN very much looks down on people who dare to sit in their own front gardens. So odd.

Have you read Oscar Wilde's 'The Selfish Giant'?