To think relationships are more work than being single

[Greenhouse12]

I can admit that I'm slightly cynical being newly single after being in a rubbish relationship for too long.

But I feel as if almost every friend I have has a story about there partner being incompetent. Everytime I go on tiktok I see these videos of women joking about asking their husband to do something simple to help and them not being able to or not knowing basic information like their Childs birthday.

I seen one yesterday about a man who thought his child was vitamin deficient because her nails never grew… he had just never cut them

I know it's not all men and I work with some great ones but recently it just looks more hassle than its worth.

I have two friends who are single mums by choice via IVF and I actually envy them! The only negative is the lack of child support.

Please restore my faith in relationships or if you have any stories about the extra mental load from having a partner

My husband is great.

Genuinely, we are a team, and he is my best friend.

However, being in this relationship is still more work than not - there is always someone else about whose opinions and preferences need to be taken into account.

I am an introvert and lived alone for about 20 years before marrying. I was very comfortable living alone. I am happy in my marriage, but if anything happened to him I would not be looking for another relationship.

my friend stayed over once and we went out and got drunk and she said ‘oh my god I couldn’t handle that, I’d rather be single’ about I can’t remember- I think it was dh leaving some stuff on the ground. The thing is while I’m not quite the leave stuff on the ground type, I’m not a fab cleaner either, plus he’s a fab cook, we laugh all the time, are mostly on the same page patenting wise and have each other’s backs. Yes there’s times you moan and it is work but it doesn’t mean you don’t love them and they aren’t there for you when you need them.

You asked me why women have relationships - I told you.

I also said that good relationships are good for you. I'm sorry about your bad experiences but this is the case either way.

If you want to be on your own then that's your choice, and I hope you don't regret it, but it is myopic to not understand why most people pair up. Your response to burnoutbabe says that you're looking at it as a transaction, which is what I mean by input/output.

You ask what do you NEED a man for; I can ask what do you NEED a woman for.
The answer is the same: nothing, and (if it's the right person) everything.

It's funny, because I was only reflecting on this myself,earlier today. After being in a long term relationship (4.5 years) from 2013 - 2017,then 2 shorter relationships between 2018 and 2021,I've come to the conclusion that I'm better off being single. I honestly think that I spent 2 years too long in the long term relationship,which I regret,but you live and learn. I have been happily single since May 2021 and I intend to stay that way. Maybe I was just getting involved with the wrong men,but without exception,they all turned out to be too demanding, expecting sex every night,their meals cooked for them,their laundry done,and for me to subsidise them when they were short of money. I suffer from various health issues and find it difficult enough to look after myself sometimes,never mind being expected to run around after someone else. Let's just say it's put me off ever getting involved with a man again.

I actually think there’s a new Renaissance happening, with women waking up to the fact many men are useless, abusive and massively misogynistic. It’s about time