To be fed up of AMA high earner threads where the poster is not actually the high earner?

[Evilcountspatula]

Please can we hear from a female (single, married, with kids, whatever) who earns enormous sums rather than someone who has married a rich husband. No jealousy, I’d have loved to have married a rich husband myself, but genuinely interested to have a thread from a woman at the top of the money earning tree. Is that too much to ask?
edited for typos

That’s a fair point that I accept. I do genuinely feel it’s a bit odd though to post about your high income household when you’re not the one generating the income. As pp have pointed out, I don’t get what there is to ask. But you are right, I could have started a thread without reference to others on the topic of women, earning potential and accompanying barriers, although I suspect it wouldn’t have got much traction. Which upon reflection is why I took the route I did.

I avoid the whole AMA topic like the plague. Just the titles make it sound like the most self-absorbed wankerdom. Obviously many topics are self-absorbed but to actually think "I'm so fascinating I'll start a thread saying Ask About Meeee!" Is too much. And when it's "Ask Meeee About How Rich I Am", eeesh. End times!

Yes, I agree. However, this particular poster made the thread into a bit of joke by selectively answering the most ridiculous questions, instead of the questions from those who were genuinely interested. Also, the answers she gave were vague and generic, so still not beneficial to posters who wanted to take away something from AMA.

Btw, I usually like AMA, a lot of interesting professions/experiences that I tend to gain something from. But come on now, that thread wasn’t serious.

Yep you are no doubt right. Just pushed my buttons to get on my high horse 😁

Of course - I’m interested in why this is almost always the woman. Obviously I understand that there are thousands of years of evolution and biological reasons behind the instinct to stay at home, but my interest in women who have gone against that stands.

@Ladyluckinred ok, but then don’t contribute? The issue isn’t that she was not high earning, but how she engaged. I also looked at the thread and thought ‘this is boring’ and moved on - repeated contributors slagging her resulted in that post appearing in trending, driving traffic to the post.

What are you classing as high earning?

Well for one, it's not always the woman. But 95% so. For two, I don't for a minute believe you're surprised. Have you just woken up from millennia of sexism?

Not surprised at all. As I say, just interested to hear from women who’ve overcome the societal barriers.

@Labraradabrador I actually didn’t contribute to that post. I’m commenting on this post, like you, driving traffic to this thread, complaining about that ‘boring’ post.

Well, when I met my husband,, I earned way more than him. That wasn't an issue, we had a child. That was it. I didn't overcome anything. But societally, there are huge factors that keep women underfoot.

Exactly. It’s a really interesting topic.

If I didn't look after the kids my dh wouldn't be a high earner so I consider it my earnings as well

Women living off a rich husband probably have more time to post on mn than women earning mega bucks.

I earn over 200k and have a soon to be 3 year old DS.

I have almost no wider family support other than DH but manage to juggle everything fairly well. It’s only possible though because of the stage I’m at in my career allows me huge flexibility.

I took a career break for the first 12 months after DS was born.

Logistically it is easier than it would have been had I become a parent when I was in my early 30’s rather than early 40’s.

If you don’t get what there is to ask, you do realise that you don’t have to ask anything right? 🤣

On the few threads I’ve seen on this subject, the poster hasn’t claimed to be the high earner. If someone wants to post it, why does it make you fed up? Some people might be interested in the lifestyle of someone who lives in a household with that income, even if it’s not mainly earned by the person posting. If it doesn’t interest you, just ignore it.

I think if a woman posted that she earned £780k on AMA, she would still get all the shitty, sarcastic replies and people telling her to read the room anyway.

This. Money talks. Wealth whispers. I really think most bragging posts are lies

Ahhhh

Be kind

I don’t think women, or people in general, who earn 6-7 figures have the time or desire to waste their time online (and answer questions)

I can’t imagine any woman who herself takes home a million or more p.a. wanting to put that information out there on MN.

You might find them contributing very interesting and useful views (whilst being fairly incognito) to threads about breaking through societal expectations, as mentioned above.

The dichotomy however in this - rather sadly - is that remaining incognito in itself demonstrates that some societal expectations are really too tough to crack through.

Go over the LinkedIn. I see several posts from women who about their lives as very successful women. The general consensus is they prioritise work and kids and not a lot else. I like the honest posts - I know for me it’s not a choice I’d like to make - these are women in the same profession as me that didn’t stop to have kids but continued to climb the ladder.

The two women I know who’d be in a position to write threads like you describe OP, are both partners in very demanding law firms. They don’t have time to start threads on MN, and would then be too diligent not to answer every comment, no matter how silly. That’s why you aren’t seeing them.

Maybe the high earners have their lives enough in control they don't need to start threads to ask advice for things?

These are the sort of women posting on LinkedIn.

I read that post. The OP was a company director with equal shares. I don’t think you understand what that means. It means she pays just as much tax as her dh. It means she earns the same, both equal dividends, into both their accounts. Both owning the company, equally.