Why don't people just stop drinking?

[PassingStranger]

Just read two crimes that were caused by alcohol.
One a speeding drunk driver, took a car and smashed Into another car on the road killing people.

Did they really think they were going to be able to negotiate the roads properly while drunk and speeding?

Another one a vile bully of a man attacked and killed his wife while he'd been drinking and she died.😱
Now two children have been left without their mum and dads in prison.
I'm sure we can all think of other crimes where drink was involved.

When are people going to stop?
Why do they need to drink all the time (sake).🙄

Agree with this post.

I think the main ‘reason’ people drink and drive is that they mistakenly think they are more in control than they actually are. They don’t feel that drunk and so surely their driving won’t be affected. Most of us who have been very drunk at some point in our lives will find this familiar because most of us at some point have woken up with an Armageddon of a hangover and thought ‘blimey, I didn’t realise I was that drunk last night’. Or we realise we can’t remember portions of the night before, even though at the time we only thought we were ‘tipsy’ rather than drunk. Most of us of course won’t drive after drinking because it’s a hard line that we won’t cross. But it is one of the tricks of alcohol that we often don’t realise how drunk we are, and I assume this is how most drunk drivers end up in that situation. (That or outright arrogance- yes, I’m pissed but I’m an excellent driver and it’s only a short distance and I probably won’t get caught…)

I know a few people who will drive after one drink but I think the majority of my friends and family members don’t drink anything at all if they know they’re driving later (or early the next day).

I don’t think you’ve said anything particularly groundbreaking by posting a thread saying that drunk drivers are terrible people- we pretty much all feel like that; and it is of course illegal. As to why it happens and how to make it stop- if we had the answer to that, we’d be able to solve the problem. I daresay governments and lawmakers have been puzzling over this particular conundrum for quite some time. If MN can come up with an answer, we should get some sort of prize.

I think alcoholism is a different matter and agree with PPs that most of those who drink drive probably aren’t alcoholics. I’ve known a few alcoholics and most of them didn’t drive at all- or even leave their house other than to walk to the shop for booze.

But I expect there are also some ‘functioning’ alcoholics who manage to hold down a job and then get stuck into the wine every night. They’ll be driving their kids to school in the morning and driving themselves to work and a proportion will be over the limit.

Being drunk even an alcoholic doesn't make you murder women so YABU. If I get very drunk I talk shite cuddle my wife and go to sleep. I don't know many other women who would do any murdering in response to too many cocktails either

You sound very naive

Most people who drink alcohol are not addicts, don't drink and drive and do not commit crimes or engage in anti-social behaviour. You won't read about them in the news because 'person has a couple of drinks and walks home from the pub' does not have much impact as a headline, but you must know some such people surely?

I mean, those people drink to excess. Most of us manage to drink without ever endangering other people.

It's a socially accepted addictive substance. That's why I don't do it anymore.

It's not as simple as you think OP, I spent much of my youth in the Middle East and the "Expat" culture was rather toxic at the time.

Despite the strict Islamic laws, drugs and alcohol were readily available in certain circles. We felt as though we were in a bubble which was immune to the laws of the country, a common expat trap to fall into.

I became addicted to drugs and alcohol in one of the most strict jurisdictions in the world, we felt we were above the law and partied all the time.

It's not something that happens to you overnight, you don't realise it, and it creeps up on you very quickly and before you know, it's taken hold.

Why are the first few posts assuming these are alcoholics?

Plenty of people aren't, but drink too much and then behave badly (to say the least, obvs) because their judgement is impaired.

Yes they do think they can navigate the roads drunk, because their judgement is impaired.

No they don't think they're going to kill someone, because their judgement is impaired.

No an alcoholic can't 'just stop'. And a person who is not an alcoholic but is drunk won't just stop being drunk, or doing daft things, because their judgement is impaired.

This is so true, I didn't mention in my previous post that I crashed a friend's car while I was;

1. Uninsured
2. Drunk
3. Under the influence of drugs

I was 17 and didn't even have a license to drive, alcohol and drugs impair your judgement and you make apocalitically stupid decisions, fortunately nobody was hurt or killed or I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

Exactly. The glib 'it's an addiction!' posts are a ridiculous simplification of the issue.

Lots of people aren't alcoholics but change when they drink too much, and not for the better. How many times have you heard people described as 'gets a bit XXX when they've had a few.'

If that XXX is not a positive thing, they just need to cut it out instead of continuing to drink knowing they'll be problematic. It's not like drinking is compulsory! Zero proof drinks and teetotallers are everywhere these days, there's never been a better time to just walk away from it - while you still can - if it doesn't agree with you.

Of course it would. I suspect most people who drink to excess wish that they had never started.

Why are so many people assuming OP is talking about alcoholics?
I wouldn't assume drink drivers are alcoholics. I think the UK should have 0 tolerance, like so many other countries, so you couldn't even have half a lager and drive.

My goodness why has no one thought of this before. Have you contacted the press, police of perhaps even the government? How did you come up with such a good plan? Have you thought of a solution to the climate issue, bet you could if you tried.

It's not as easy as "just stop" though, is it?
If it was then there'd be no addicts.
Edit to say YABU!

While you’re at it, OP, can you solve the obesity epidemic by suggesting people eat less, and more healthily, get all those pesky depressives to cheer up and those with anxiety to just stop worrying?

Fatuous “why doesn’t damaging behaviour just not happen?” isn’t exactly a help.

They don't stop drinking because they can't stop drinking.

The same way some people can't stop gambling or drug using. It's a compulsion, verging on a mental health disorder.

It's very complex, much like the human condition.

No-one grows up wanting to become a heavy drinker or a drug user/abuser, or an anorexic or anything.....but sometimes a mixture of factors make a person end up that way.

What I don't understand is why people have this desire to go out and get pissed, knowing that they'll waste the best part of the next day suffering a hangover. It all seems so pointless to me, and they even laugh about it, as if it's something to be proud about. Why can't the vast majority of people have fun without needing alcohol to do it?

Addicts- can't stop because if they could, they wouldn't be addicts. It requires alot of time, effort and support and a huge amount of forgiveness.
The nature of alcohol is that it effects your executive functioning first, so people aren't fully aware they are impaired.
There is a drinking culture around socialising.

And all the people who lose their phone/jacket when they go out.
And the ones who get teary and ruin everyone's night.
The ones who always end up trying to start a fight.
The ones who do reckless shit and get hurt.
Who snog/sleep with people they regret.
Who piss the bed.

We all know or have known someone who ticks one of those.

They're not all alcoholics, they're just better people without booze, and they know it but they keep drinking anyway!

Because alcohol is actually considered a ‘hard drug’ (using the old term), yet the government do nothing to regulate it as they make huge amounts of money out of it. Thats the reason. People drink it for the same reasons they use other drugs of that nature, and I say that as someone who does enjoy an occasional drink.

They think it won’t happen to them or they won’t get caught because they are self absorbed pricks. They will have made the decision to drive home before they started drinking.

As a person who has issues with alcohol, go the fuck away with your judgement.
As with mental health, the system is shit for help for addicts. I tried to access it and they turned me away because the amount of alcohol I consumed in a week wasn't high enough. I've never been a public drinker.

I now drink non alcohol wine because I'm on a tablet that will affect my liver, so I don't want to fuck it up completely.
I don't drink and drive. I live next a pub and frequently see cars parked outside. It's always older folk. The youngsters walk to the pub.

I'm delighted you managed to end your addiction but it's absolute nonsense to say "all addictions can be overcome". Your's could, many other people's can't and will never be.

i am a retired psychotherapist. There is so much harm done by the mindset "someone achieved X so I should be able to do that too'. We all have personal capabilities and limitations. The shame that people can feel thinking that they really ought to be able to heal themselves because other people have done it can be very damaging.

To say every one can overcome addiction is as untrue as saying everyone can run a four minute mile.

It infuriates me seeing alcohol as a 'marker' used on TV. For instance, home from work = glass of wine, sad, happy, depressed = glass of wine. I gave up drinking many years ago and was shocked at how little the majority of people drink. I'm glad that's it's now completely normal to order a soft drink.